


Of All the Camps in All of Korea

by oldmoviewatcher



Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-11-09
Packaged: 2019-06-06 12:33:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 45,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15194888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oldmoviewatcher/pseuds/oldmoviewatcher
Summary: Finally taking in the scenery of Central Park, Margaret barely registers the wind take her hat off as she pulls her coat closer to her."Penny for your thoughts?" A male voice asks her. She turns to find a pair of blue eyes staring down at her and a dazzling smile to match. Instantly, Margaret smiles back as she explains, "I was just admiring the park. I've never been to New York before."





	1. Chapter 1

Stepping off the plane, Margaret Houlihan and her father gather their belongings, hail a cab, and head to the hotel General Al Houlihan's friend is staying at. Three years after the Second World War and only six months state side, Margaret is finally getting used to civilian life. And, as of 1948 is attending an Army Navy game with her father and his friend. The three joyfully root for their team and after attending the game, Al's friend proposes they all go out for dinner. Margaret declines a dinner invitation and ventures on her own through the city. Finally taking in the scenery of Central Park, Margaret barely registers the wind take her hat off as she pulls her coat closer to her.

"Penny for your thoughts?" A male voice asks her. She turns to find a pair of blue eyes staring down at her and a dazzling smile to match. Instantly, Margaret smiles back as she explains, "I was just admiring the park. I've never been to New York before."

"I've only made it down here a few times, myself. How do you like it?"

Margaret shrugs. "There's less bugs."

Noticing his confused expression, the blonde explains, "I was stationed in Australia during the war. I was a nurse there. I just got stateside about six months ago."

"Just got back?" The man questions. Margaret nods explaining, "I stayed until the Nurse Corps was nearly discontinued."

The blue eyed man smirks, "I'm a doctor. There's a medical conference in town that I'm currently avoiding. Some pompous surgeon is giving a boring, opinionated lecture."

Margaret smiles and imagines the many doctors from war. A small break ensues until the doctor announces, "I think your hat flew off."

Graciously, he extends his hat holding, gloved hand toward her. Margaret smiles and takes the hat. Thanking him, the army nurse puts the hat back on, but not before the blue eyed doctor rights an errant blonde strand of her hair. Stepping away, the doctor gives his name. Margaret gives hers just as her new friend motions toward the bench. They sit down as he asks, "What brings you to New York?"

Sitting beside him, Margaret answers, "The Army Navy Game. My father's friend had tickets."

"Army or Navy?"

"Sorry?"

"Who did you root for?" He clarifies. A wide grin plays on the blonde's face as she answers, "Army."

Shivering from the cold, Margaret wonders aloud if they can get a cup of coffee. Finding a small cafe, the couple continues to talk until they are kicked out. Leaving, the pair continues to talk until they reach the man's hotel. Margaret almost leaves, when he offers her a drink joking, "My boss is paying for it."

"In that case," Margaret begins with a smile as she holds out her hand for the man to lead her into the hotel bar. The pair continues to talk and drink barely registering the time. The next morning, Margaret wakes up to find herself alone with no one else in the hotel room. Feeling rejected and mortified, the blonde quickly grabs her clothes and changes. Entering the lobby, Margaret asks the front desk for directions to her own hotel before leaving with the little dignity she has left. Walking down the street, the blonde focuses on getting back to her hotel room and explaining to her father why she does not sleep at their hotel. So absorbed in her mission, Margaret never notices anyone call her name or a crestfallen look on the face of a man who holds a bag and two coffee cups.

A year later, Margaret toes off her shoes and stumbles her way into her room. Changing out of her nurse's uniform into a nightgown, the blonde hears a cry and heads toward her son's crib. Stuck in a small, one bedroom apartment leaves her little option where to put the baby. Secretly, she has a fear that something will happen if he is in another room. Picking the baby up, Margaret cradles him and pads into the living room where she keeps the rocking chair a friend so graciously gives her. Rocking her son, she soon lets him nurse and marvels at how big he is. She barely believes three months ago is when she brought him home. Trying to decide if he looks anything like his father, she soon begins to nod off. Waking periodically to her son's whimpers, the mother looks down when the baby stops feeding.

"Michael," She whispers softly. Smiling at his sleeping form, Margaret begins re-adjusting her nightgown to put him back in bed. Picking the baby up, the mother instantly knows something is wrong. He falls limp, and she spends too much time with the wounded not to know what a limp body feels like. Shock courses through her as she feels for a pulse. Then, she hears a knock on her door and a neighbor asking her to open it never realizing her screams are what causes the commotion.

Michael Pierce Houlihan's funeral is short with very few people attending. Margaret is barely functioning and in need of her sister to keep her from crying over the tiny casket. The next month, Margaret finds herself drunk and still mourning the loss of her son until an officer comes into the bar recruiting for the army. Remembering her son is the reason for her resignation, Margaret drunkenly decides to rejoin. Not only will the Army keep her from mourning her loss, but her father will also be happy.


	2. Chapter 2

Stepping into camp, a tall doctor takes stock of where his orders place him. Amid the dirt and army green tents displaying the number of his MASH unit, the man manages to find his way to the Colonel's office where a short bespeckled kid asks who he is.

"Hawkeye Pierce," The man replies before correcting himself. "My papers will say Benjamin F. Pierce."

The younger man looks at the roster of names and leads him to a tent with four bunks.

"Captain Pierce? This is Trapper," The clerk explains.

"Thanks Radar," Trapper states hoping this man is nothing like his other bunk mate. "Welcome to The Swamp."

Hawkeye smiles at the name, easily noticing how well it suits his messy, new abode. Trapper lets Radar leave and begins to show his bunk mate around the camp. Walking around and getting the Grand Tour, as Trapper calls it, Hawkeye jerks his head when he sees a certain blonde nurse walk by. Laughing, Trapper replies, "That's Major Margaret Houlihan. She's head nurse. Careful though, she's taken by old Ferret Face over there."

"Yeah, what's he like?" Hawkeye asks trying to dismiss the memory of Margaret leaving him alone outside his hotel holding coffees and breakfast. Shrugging, Trapper replies, "Dull? Lifeless? Our other bunk mate. His real name's Frank. He's a major, too. I got a feeling the majors like to stick together."

Nodding, Hawkeye watches Margaret laugh at something Frank says. Smirking, Hawkeye motions Trapper to follow him before he catches the Majors' attention. Stunned to find Ben Pierce in front of her, Margaret stands with her mouth open as Frank asks, "Who are you?"

Ignoring his bunk mate, Hawkeye extends his hand to the nurse. She takes it out of reflex, and is soon locked in a seering kiss. Pulling back, Margaret whispers, "Hi."

Now she remembers how they end up sleeping together two years ago.

"How dare you!" Frank exclaims breaking the moment as Trapper nearly falls to the ground laughing. He and Hawkeye are going to have fun.

"It's okay, Frank," Margaret replies cooly before she stalks off with the man. Trapper and Hawkeye watch the pair leave, the latter wanting to run after them. Hawkeye has no idea seeing the blonde again can stir up so many feelings he is unprepared to deal with. Instead, he forges a friendship with his new bunkmate and begins to silently observe his former one night stand. Every so often he makes a flirtatious remark or outright flirts with her, but every time she brushes him off. He wants to talk with her alone, but Frank is always around. For a bit of sanity, Hawkeye needs to know why Margaret leaves all those years ago, and why she is so cross with him. Instead, he digs as deep a hole as he can find via sarcastic comments and jokes hoping that she will fall in with him one day. Maybe then they will actually talk.

For Margaret, seeing Hawkeye is too hearbreaking. All she sees is a man who left and a burning image of her son. Somehow, Michael has his father's eyes from day one. She never gets to see what else her child possesses. Indifference and Army superiority are what keep her going. Every so often, Hawkeye glances at Margaret. He knows there is something different about her, but cannot figure out what it is. She is obviously more serious than their first– only– encounter, but he chalks that to Army life. Working with her in surgery one day, he detects a possible hint of sadness in her eyes. He tries to nonverbally ask her what is wrong, but she merely shakes her head and proceeds to pass him another instrument.

"Margaret," He whispers sincerely. The glare he receives keeps him quiet a moment as he switches to a lighter subject. Appreciating the change, Margaret wonders how she can be so transparent. Hawkeye does not need to know he is partially to blame for her pain.

However, from that surgery session, the pair realizes there is more of a connection then just their one night stand two years ago. To both Chief Surgeon and Head Nurse's dismay, they find they work well together. Usually that is helpful, but not with so much unsaid tension.

On the anniversary of her son's death, Margaret is surrounded by the chaos of the OR. She tries to keep focused on everything that happens which results in her critiquing the nurses just to know she is actually doing her job and not thinking of her son.

"'And I'd like to make an announcement! Major Houlihan and I are getting married! Right sugar?'" Hawkeye asks bringing her out of her memory as well as ending her tirade.

"'What?" She yells adding, "'We are not!'"

"'Then go ahead and have the baby alone.'"

His words are like a punch in the stomach and her eyes glass over for a moment. Thankfully everyone is too busy to notice Margaret's quickly masked grief. No one needs to know about her three month old's death. Receiving a letter from an old friend later that day finally sends the nurse into a rage. Ranting to Frank, Margaret finally goes to Colonel Blake's office to request a transfer naming Hawkeye and Trapper as the main cause. In reality, Hawkeye is the only cause. Without him she would not be grieving. As if she declares late November her own personal holiday, Margaret steadily drinks herself into an unfeeling mess.

Saddled with a drunk nurse thanks to their barbs, Hawkeye and Trapper guide her into the showers. Being closest, Trapper pushes Margaret into a stall and keeps her still while Hawkeye pulls the shower cord.

"'I could've gone for you'," Margaret admits staring at Hawkeye once she is a little sober. He smirks replying, "'It's been known to happen.'"

Dismissing his remark, the head nurse immediately turns to Trapper signaling to Hawkeye that the shower is definitely helping. Deciding the thoroughly drenched Margaret is fit to dry out in their tent a few minutes later, Hawkeye and Trapper keep her company. Giving the nurse a shot of B10, Hawkeye can see the confused look in her eyes as she remarks, "'I didn't get you anything.'"

Bitterly, he thinks about her leaving instead. Dragging the nurse to her tent to let her get dressed, Trapper asks Hawkeye, "What was that about?"

"What was what about?"

"You and Margaret. That look you shared."

Shrugging, Hawkeye answers, "I don't know what you're talking about."

Before Trapper can say anymore, Margaret throws her tent door open. Eyes wide, she asks, "Did we have wounded?"


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, Hawkeye stifles a laugh as Trapper teases Margaret about her drinking.

"'I want to tell you how much last night meant to me'," Trapper mocks. She gives Hawkeye a slight glance as if asking if what they say is true. However, most of her is too tired and hungover to care. Shaking his head, Hawkeye merely gives her a small smile adding, "It could be worse."

"It could be you?" Margaret deadpans as she notices the spark in Hawkeye's eyes dim just a little. Shaking her head, the nurse whispers an apology. She knows they need to talk, however showing up at The Swamp and asking for Hawkeye will cause more harm then good. Especially from Frank. Instead she shrugs it off.

The next week, the camp talks of nothing but medical jargon, wounded, and the Army Navy Game. Placing bets and treating patients ceases on the day of the game. Unfortunately, so does the happy atmosphere of the camp. When an unexploded bomb lands in the compound, Hawkeye and Trapper become the surgeons to disarm it.

Watching the men disarm the bomb, Margaret stays tense. Only when they are safe does she breathe a sigh of relief. She almost runs over to make sure they are okay, when Frank opens his mouth and complains, "I could've done that."

"Stuff it, Frank," Margaret states watching Hawkeye closely to see if he is okay. After the men walk back to Henry, Margaret is able to get a better look at them.

"See something you like," Hawkeye teases softly so only Margaret can hear. He receives a small smirk and the pair is brought out of their side conversation when Henry asks about the game. Quickly, Henry, Radar, and Trapper head to the office leaving Hawkeye with the two majors. Waggling his eyebrows, Hawkeye teases, "I'll leave you two alone. I need to get my bet money."

"You lose again, Pierce?" Frank badgers. Rolling his eyes, Hawkeye shoots back, "I'll have you know that I won big time a couple years ago."

Quickly, the surgeon leaves before he can see Margaret's reaction. Frank however stays oblivious as Margaret masks her shock and excuses herself to her tent.

"Okay, Pumpkin," Frank states as he follows her. Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "Alone."

Left alone, Margaret sits down at her desk to think. She has no idea how to process Hawkeye's remark to Frank, and wonders how she can be considered a win. Maybe she is just one of his conquests like all the other women he is with. No better than the Generals she knows. Putting her head in her hands, the nurse tries and fails to stop thinking about New York.

"We sure know how to celebrate Army Navy Games," Hawkeye remarks when he enters Margaret's tent after the winner of the game is announced. Confused as to why the man is in her tent, Margaret merely stares at him.

Finally, she answers, "If you're looking for a repeat of that night, I'm not in the mood for it."

Hawkeye's eyes light up not expecting to hear the comment come from her mouth. He almost starts to speak when the nurse stops him.

"Even if your boss is paying for the drink," She teases although confused on why the words leave her mouth. Somehow this man makes her more herself, and she is a little scared by the prospect. Hawkeye nods. After a moment, the surgeon confesses, "You know, I was on my way back when you left that morning?"

Margaret stares at him in shock as Hawkeye continues, "You weren't paying attention to anything. I called out your name and nothing."

"Ben," The blonde whispers reverting back to their night together. She is desperate not to have their much needed conversation, but to her dismay, Hawkeye gently asks, "Why did you leave?"

It is a question he needs answered for two years, and if this is the only chance, he will take it. Shaking her head, Margaret tries to change the topic, but Hawkeye's eyes are so insistent that she truthfully answers, "When I woke up, you weren't there. I was shocked and ashamed. You don't know what that's like! I was alone. I'd never been alone like that before. So unwanted."

He barely hears Margaret's last confession and wonders if she even wants him to.

"You weren't unwanted," He begins. "When I woke up, you were sound asleep. I left a note telling you I was getting breakfast. I guess it fell off the table."

With a self deprecating scoff, the surgeon adds, "You know I kept it?"

"The note?" Margaret whispers feeling like the worst person to exist as she adds, "I almost wrote you, but I figured you'd moved on."

Shaking his head, Hawkeye replies, "Not for a while. I was pretty pathetic. You?"

"I had a hard time forgetting about you, too," She answers delicately. She never writes about Michael in the first place because she is a coward, but wonders if saying something now is a good idea. There is no point getting his hopes up just to crush them, though. Thankfully, she is interrupted from her thoughts by a knock and a whiny, "Margaret!"

Rolling her eyes, Margaret calls out, "Just a minute!"

"Why do you like him?" Hawkeye asks returning back to his camp self. Shrugging, the nurse asks, "He's safe. My father would approve."

"Ah! If I remember correctly, you talked highly of him. Would Dear Old Dad disapprove of me?" Hawkeye teases. Margaret smiles slightly answering, "Very much so."

"Good," Hawkeye grins. Unable to resist, Margaret grins back until another whine from Frank brings them back to reality. Standing, Hawkeye says to Margaret as she opens the door, "Thanks for telling me, Margaret. It's a load off my mind."

"Pierce! What are you doing in here?" Frank hollers. Shrugging, Hawkeye replies, "Just checking on a patient."

"I was the last nurse on duty to see him," Margaret lies letting her former lover escape. Lying in bed that night, Margaret finally begins to question her decisions the last few months of camp. She knows Frank is not the best choice, but he has too much of his own baggage to worry about hers, which is a comfort. Drifting off to sleep, Margaret reminds herself that nothing can happen with her and Hawkeye again, even if she still has feelings for him.

The next day however, any good words spoken are easily lost when Hawkeye degrades Frank during surgery. However, when his own patient does not get any better, Hawkeye tries to keep any thoughts of his own mistakes to himself causing himself to be a little rude to Margaret in the process. Talking to Henry in the compound a little later, Hawkeye notices Margaret come toward him.

"'Captain Pierce'," She calls out.

"'Taking to cruising the compound, Major?'" He patronizes upset over the last days' events. Annoyed, Margaret asks, "'Can't you put your hostility aside for one minute?'"

"'Oh, all right. I'll stack it on top of my anger'," Hawkeye sarcastically answers. Ignoring his remark, Margaret explains that she is worried about Hawkeye's patient.

"'Welcome to the club'," Hawkeye remarks. Knowing she needs to tell him now rather than later, the nurse asks, "'Sort of going over it in my mind, and- Well, is it possible you missed something? I'm not trying to be a wise guy.'"

"'That I missed something is not exactly a new thought. But what? There were an awful lot of fragments. You couldn't account for every one of them'," Margaret placates knowing how good a surgeon he is, but also keenly aware of human error. After a moment she adds, "'Look, there could've been more damage, but where? Could it have nicked the small intestine?'"

"'Impossible. I couldn't have missed that. I ran the- I ran the bowel before I closed him up. What about- What about the- - No. Come on. Look. You were just assisting. I ran the controls. I ought to know'," Hawkeye defends obviously a little too hostile. Hurt by the man's words, Margaret accuses, "'Well, you obviously don't.'"

"'Well, I'll just hang a diploma in the latrine and open a hot dog stand. Good night, Major'," Hawkeye answers wounded by her lack of faith. Annoyed by his ego, Margaret repeats her own good- night before heading off to her tent ranting about her conversation with Hawkeye to Frank. When she is finally asleep that night, Margaret decides to dismiss the loud knock on her door.

"'Hey. Hey! Hey! Hey, wake up! Come on! Wake up! Let's go! Open the door!'" The voice calls out. Realizing Hawkeye is at her tent door, Margaret opens the door to him asking what is wrong.

Too enthusiastic for the middle of the night, Hawkeye remarks, "'I'm opening him up again.'"

"'What?'" Margaret questions wondering how much sleep Hawkeye actually has. She is doubly confused when Hawkeye tells her she will assist him. Knowing there is no getting out of the midnight surgery, Margaret answers, "'Wait till I get some clothes on.'"

"'Later. Wake up UglyJohn. Get somebody to prep Thompson. Come on. Move'," Hawkeye orders waking up Frank in the process. In surgery, Hawkeye is quiet except for when he needs different instruments. Finally Margaret asks, "'Anything?'"

"'Not yet. Pick up some scissors.'"

"'These okay?'" She asks. Taking the proffered scissors, Hawkeye answers, "'Yeah, fine.'"

Finally, Frank and Margaret hear Hawkeye call out, "'Bingo. The shrapnel tore the back of his sigmoid colon.'"

"'That has to be it'," The nurse praises still in awe of the surgeon's skill. Not wanting to feel left out, Frank announces, "'Anybody could've missed that.'"

"'Thanks, Frank'," Hawkeye deadpans before announcing, "'Okay, let's close him up.'"

"'You know something, Major?'" Hawkeye asks once his patient is sewn.

"'What's that?'" She answers realigning the instruments to clean. With a smirk, he answers, "'You're beautiful when you sweat.'"

Margaret merely rolls her eyes before getting ready for post opt duty. When Hawkeye comes to breakfast the next morning, he notices Margaret sitting alone. Sliding into a seat beside her, Hawkeye formally apologizes adding, "'I want to thank you for your help, and tell you how sorry I am for not believing you."

Putting her spoon down, Margaret thanks him and accepts the apology adding, "And I'm sorry for leaving."

"Apology accepted," Hawkeye answers before handing her a piece of paper and walking away. Opening the note, Margaret masks any shock she may have when she realizes it is the note Hawkeye leaves her on the nightstand two years ago. Suddenly losing her appetite, the nurse heads to her tent to read the note alone. Written in his handwriting, she notices he thanks her for that night and that he will be back. When she reads that he signs it as 'Ben', Margaret begins to cry realizing all that she may have missed with him.


	4. Chapter 4

The next day, Hawkeye waits for Margaret to thank him for or at least acknowledge the note he gives her. Instead he notices her distance herself. For a few days, he tries asking her about the note before giving up. Unable to talk to anyone about his problems, Hawkeye simply makes snarkier comments than usual. Finally, he corners her in the scrub room after surgery.

"You've been avoiding me," Hawkeye whispers to Margaret as they get out of their scrubs. Instead of facing him, Margaret throws her scrub mask and hat into the laundry bin and skirts away from him. She will not make a scene while people walk by. However, when she hears him plead her name, the nurse turns. Seeing Margaret's eyes brim with tears, Hawkeye pulls her behind the curtain. Finally, she whispers, "I'm so sorry."

"Sorry?" Hawkeye questions. Softly, Margaret states, "I should have written you, and I didn't. I at least had your home address."

Realizing that she really is sorry, Hawkeye answers, "I forgive you. I just wanted to know what you thought of the note."

Margaret watches as a hint of a smile crosses his lips. Feeling a little embarrassed for her outburst, the nurse answers, "I did. Thank you. The fact that it was on the hotel stationary was a nice touch."

Confused, Hawkeye asks if she is implying that the letter is fake. Shaking her head, Margaret emphatically denies it adding, "It was nice seeing the crest. Almost like an odd momento."

Nodding, the Chief Surgeon teases, "You want to go find a coffee shop and talk some more?"

With a smile, Margaret shakes her head just as they hear a voice call Hawkeye's name. Signaling for her to stay behind the curtain until he leaves, Hawkeye comments that he will be out in a second. Stepping out from the curtain, Hawkeye heads out the door with Trapper leaving Margaret to resume her army exterior before entering Post Op. Checking patients, Margaret sits and talks with the soldiers unaware that Hawkeye walks in. For a moment all he does is watch her interact with the soldiers and easily realizes how great a nurse the woman is. She may present a tough persona, but she really has a heart of gold. Something that draws her to him even years after they meet is her compassion. He just wishes she shows it more. When a patient calls out to him, Hawkeye finally stands away from the doorway. Out of the corner of his eye, Hawkeye notices Margaret is up, too.

"You get stuck here, too?" The nurse questions as she walks past him while he hangs up a clip board. Shaking his head, Hawkeye answers, "Just checking on a patient. Do you mind keeping an eye on Corporal Michael while you're here? I don't want to risk his getting an infection. If you need anything, Trapper's in X-ray. I'm going to sleep."

Margaret nods in reply before continuing her work until she finds out that Trapper and Hawkeye are going to operate on an enlisted son of a general. Despite wanting to continue her work, Margaret decides to placate Frank and go with him into surgery. However, after all the commotion, the camp is given an Officer's Club. Falling into her "Frank" persona as she dubs it, she happily takes in the quiet of the new club with Frank's aggravating chatter as her  
personal white noise to help her drown out her feelings for Hawkeye. After the other night, she is unsure if the feelings are true or residual. Left over from a son Hawkeye knows nothing about, or from a latent, undying affection. Staying on shallow topics, Margaret is unamused when she hears distinct voices praising the Officer's Club.

Sitting down with Frank and Margaret, Hawkeye and Trapper proceed to ask for drinks. Turning to Margaret, Hawkeye asks, "'Margaret? What is that? An Old Fashioned?'"

"'With fruit, yes'," She answers wishing the doctors and de facto officers will leave. One of her proponents for having an Officer's Club that is strictly for officers is to keep away from Hawkeye. Even though he is listed as Officer, she highly doubts he will enter the new club. However, now that he barges in, she has nowhere to hide.

"'Margaret, let me dance my way into your heart'," Hawkeye announces as he takes her hand and she escapes her thoughts. Reflexively, she accepts as Frank tries to keep them apart. Margaret is quiet as she wonders what Frank will do if he knew her history with the Chief Surgion. As Hawkeye whisks her away, the nurse easily falls into him. However, remembering how much she is supposed to dislike him, Margaret pulls away asking, "'Must we dance so close?'"

"'I do. It's a muscular problem'," He admits knowing that having her in his arms in any way is a problem, especially since they have forgiven each other. Despite his reputation as camp womanizer, Hawkeye is merely just biding his time until they can be together again. Quickly, he adds, "'If I don't rub thighs with someone every four hours, I get the bends.'"

Margaret merely nods seeing through his ruse. However instead of telling her some drivel about missing her, she is shocked when Hawkeye states that he and Trapper have a petition to let the enlisted men into the club.

"'Sign it, Margaret'," Hawkeye states after Margaret denies signing. "'I'm warning you, my legs are loaded.'"

Despite his insistence, Hawkeye cannot convince her. When they walk into the Officer's Club that night, Hawkeye and Trapper walk right up to Frank and Margaret the latter commenting on their clean-shavenness. Staring at Hawkeye a little too long, Margaret is thankful when the men walk toward the bar. She is in no mood to continue thinking about how nice Hawkeye looks in and out of uniform. However, the nurse's resolve begins to crumble when she can smell Hawkeye's aftershave when he stands behind her and grabs his drink later that night as part of her remembers their one night in the hotel bar. Shaking her head, Margaret immediately begins to talk to the General. After Hawkeye and Trapper end up bringing in the entire camp an hour later, Margaret is completely distraught. Leaving ten minutes later, the nurse knows she looks like a haughty, spoiled brat, but has little need to care. However, when footprints come up behind her, the nurse walks faster.

"Margaret!" Hawkeye calls out confused. She walks faster making the surgeon guess what is wrong with her. After he calls her name again, Margaret turns and answers, "Captain?"

"You left!" He accuses. Angry, more at herself than anyone else, Margaret spits, "Hurts, doesn't it?"

Bewildered, Hawkeye stares at the blonde wondering what he does wrong. The enlisted deserve a place to relax, and their own tents are less than ideal most of the time. Finally, he asks if she is angry about the Officer's Club. Margaret's eyes darken at the question as she grinds out, "That was my one place to get away from you."

"One place? Margaret you have a whole camp to get away from me at!" Hawkeye replies. Shaking her head, Margaret whispers, "Everywhere I go, there is a reminder of you. Surgery, Post Op, my tent!"

"Your tent?" Hawkeye repeats causing Margaret to backtrack. In no way does she want him to know that unsent letters and their son's birth certificate lie in a locked desk drawer in her tent. Swallowing, Margaret lies, "Yours and Trapper's pranks and Frank's incessant complaints permeate every wall of my tent."

"Well, I'll pay to have it dry cleaned," Hawkeye scoffs. The pair lock eyes trying to win a battle of wills when an MP on watch comes across them. Aware of a question directed toward them, Hawkeye answers, "Just a friendly fire. Good night, Major."

"Captain," Margaret answers before heading to bed.

The pair decides against speaking to each other for the remainder of the week until they are the last two not ravaged with Flu by the weekend.


	5. Chapter 5

Left to run the camp, Margaret and Hawkeye make a deal to divide and conquer. Hawkeye will take care of patients and Margaret will work the administrative aspect. Stuck together, the pair falls into an easy repoir that seems to linger from the first day they met.

"'Hi, dear. Having a tough day at the office?'" Hawkeye teases enjoying the ease of talking to her without Frank around.

"'Just filling out the daily report'," Margaret answers busy at the typewriter. Unceremoniously, Hawkeye hands over more papers. "'Add these. Pints of blood used. Pints of blood needed. Progress of cases reports. And on page six, you'll find my resignation. If you skip every other word, you'll see it's also a suicide note.

"'Don't be facetious'," Margaret chastises not wanting to think of her only link to Michael dying in the middle of a war. Shrugging, Haweye answers, "'All right, then I'll go home as a deserter, in chains, anything.'"

"'That will do, Captain'," The nurse replies as Hawkeye continues, "'I don't care. I'm getting out of here. And I'm taking you with me, Margaret. We'll send for Frank later.'"

"'Can I interest you in a little Have you examined the flu patients? Frank's temp is up'," Margaret explains hoping to end the man's prattling and her fantasy of actually running off with him. Playing along, Hawkeye gives the vitals of Henry and Trapper.

"'I'm gonna sack out. You want anything from me before I go? I'm yours'," Hawkeye adds. Knowing this may be her only chance, Margaret tells him she has a serum that may prevent the flu before explaining, "'It's experimental.'"

With a laugh, Hawkeye replies, "'Classic army thinking: Locking the barn after the horse has the flu.'"

Ignoring his joke, Margaret advises, "'It may help. We ought to immunize each other.'"

Smirking, Hawkeye exclaims, "'Margaret, another dream come true.'"

"'I think we ought to give each other injections'," She proposes causing Hawkeye to immediately explain, "'I'm no good with a needle. I never have been.'"

"'I can take it'," The nurse replies realizing what they are doing is frowned upon in any other medical setting. Taking the vial, Hawkeye playfully asks where Margaret wants her shot. Too tired to play games, Margaret answers, "'In my arm.'"

"'Party pooper'," He teases as he sticks Margaret with the needle. She lets out a shout as he defends, "'Told you I was lousy.'"

As an afterthought, Hawkeye adds, "'Maybe we are in a movie. You're Bette Davis and I'm George Brent. You do me.'"

The nurse wants to say he is Clark Gable and she is Claudette Colbert, but keeps the thought to herself. Professionally, Margaret states, "'Roll up your sleeve.'"

When her the surgeon objects, the nurse asks, "'What do you mean, "uh-uh"?' Someone could walk in.'"

"'I want mine in my tushy'," Hawkeye explains making Margaret question his real age. Still confused, she asks, "'You what?'"

"'Derriere.'" Hawkeye explains, "'The back of my front. The fleshy part. I can't take pain. I can only give it.'"

Rolling her eyes, Margaret states, "'All right. Lower your trousers.'"

"'I thought you'd never ask.'" He teases as Margaret adds, "'Only as far as you have to. You're just loving this, aren't you?'"

"'Aren't you?'" Hawkeye questions unable to see the small smirk on the blonde's face. Instead she states, "'Let me get at your hip.'"

"'Anytime, darling'," The surgeon replies just as Radar walks in, "'Sir? Excuse me. I'm sorry.'"

The now traumatized clerk backs out of the office as Margaret jabs the needle into Hawkeye's flesh. Shocked, Hawkeye exclaims, "'Ow! Margaret, that was fantastic.'"

"'Fine'," Margaret answers as she caps the needle to dispose of it and wishing to take a nap somewhere without a man she cannot seem to get out of her head. She may still like him, but hours with sick patients is grating her nerves. Ever the jokester, Hawkeye adds one more barb as he pulls his pants back on, "'I hope you realize this means we're engaged.'''

Unable to resist his teasing any longer, Margaret caves and smiles adding, "We never were conventional."

Instantly, the nurse regrets her comment knowing she does not need to joke about a child he will never know. Hawkeye merely laughs as the nurse tries to look away. Noticing a look of sadness cross the woman's face, the surgeon whispers her name softly just as the office door opens. Shocked to see their CO, the former lovers quickly breaks apart.

"'Well, Mr. and Mrs. 4077 th at home, in my office'," Henry complains. The surgeon and nurse question why the man is walking around before he is soon back in his bed. Every so often, the pair finds themselves alone, but it is usually to take the smallest of naps. While tending to Frank and Trapper hours later, Margaret and Hawkeye are told there are wounded. Trapper insists he can help, but Hawkeye easily talks his friend out of performing surgery. Instead he informs Radar to get blood from anyone he can. About to head off, Margaret stops the clerk. Ignoring the nurse, Hawkeye orders Radar, "'Tell them you're acting under the direct orders of General Clayton.'"

Insulted that no one will listen to her, Margaret yells, "'Just one moment, Captain!'"

"'Radar, go'," Hawkeye orders.

"'Stay!'" Margaret insists as Hawkeye battles, "'I said go!'"

"'And I said stay!'" Margaret exclaims. Breaking the stalemate, Radar replies, "'She outranks you. She's got more things on her uniform.'"

"'She's got more things in her uniform, but go'," Hawkeye orders. Looking at Margaret, Radar apologizes before leaving. Angry, Margaret asks, "'I thought we understood that I am administration.'"

"'Let me tell you something, administration'," Hawkeye begins, "'You know that little shot you gave me for the flu?'"

"'Yes'," Margaret replies.

"'Well it worked, I got it'," Hawkeye states as Margaret asks, "'Are you sure?'"

"'I've got enough nausea to light up the city of Toledo, okay? First I'm hot, then I'm cold, and my knees are in business for themselves. My tongue has gone cashmere, and I'd like to find an all night latrine that takes servicemen. Now, have I got the flu or am I just in love?'" He questions knowing the last comment will keep her quiet. Now concerned, Margaret asks, "'Do you think you can operate?'"

Still left with a bit of humor, Hawkeye sarcastically replies, "'I've got to. What am I going to tell the casualties? To stop bleeding until I feel better?'"

Hawkeye watches Margaret take a thermometer from her pocket.

"'I want to see if you have a fever'," She states softly as she feels a sudden need to take care of him.

"'Oh, trust me. I've got fever to burn'," Hawkeye remarks.

"'I'm worried about you, Doctor'," Margaret admits, worried now as a friend rather than a colleague. However, the look they give each other is much more than friends. Quickly, Hawkeye realizes the nurse is worrying about just him and not his operating abilities. Touched, the surgeon asks, "'You really are, aren't you? You know all those rotten things I've said to you, all those nasty little tricks I've played on you?'"

"'Yes'," Margaret answers wondering where the man's flu addled brain will go. With a smirk, he tells her, "'I'd like to get well and do them all over again.'"

As they operate, Margaret keeps an eye on both the patient and her crush and asks, "'How do you feel?'"

"'I have this terrific thirst for embalming fluid'," Hawkeye jokes. Unphased by his humor, the nurse specifically asks, "'Are you gonna make it?'"

"'That's up to you, Margaret'," Hawkeye answers honestly knowing she can do most of the work by now. Astounded at his ability to work while close to delirious, Margaret gushes slightly as they perform surgery, "'You're incredible. As sick as you are, digging into someone's gut, and you still can proposition a nurse.'"

"'I've endowed a dirty old man to make a pass at you two years after I'm dead. It's in my will'," Hawkeye replies as he continues to operate before relinquishing the patient over to Margaret.

"'You close the skin'," Hawkeye tells her. Soon Father Mulcahey comes into the operating room, Hawkeye soon coaches the two of them into finishing the procedure. The lucid part of his brain thinks this moment is perfect to kiss Margaret on the cheek. He will simply blame it on the fever. Instead, he sees Radar come in with blood. Thankful they can have transfusions, Hawkeye directs Radar where to go before telling him, "'Radar, you'll be assisting Margaret Houlihan, nurse, friend and all around good egg.'"

After his last declaration, the surgeon leaves the OR to find a place to sleep off the flu. Staring at the head nurse, Radar silently questions Hawkeye's compliment. Deflecting, Margaret replies, "'He's very sick.'"

Covered in blood a couple hours later, Margaret takes off her surgery scrubs and throws them in the laundry bin. With a sigh, she sits on the bench until Radar comes up to her.

"Major," He asks timidly, "Captain Pierce is asking for you, Ma'am."

Nodding, Margaret tells the clerk to take her to him. Finding him in his tent, Margaret sits down beside his cot. Smoothing his hair back, Margaret whispers his name.

Swallowing, Hawkeye states, "You came back!"

"Yeah," She softly answers before asking Radar for a cup of water. Feeling his forehead, the nurse is shocked by how high his fever is.

"Did you want coffee? I got some sugar packets from the diner in case you don't like black," Hawkeye mumbles. Smirking, Margaret thanks him. Stroking his hair again, the nurse takes the cup Radar offers and encourages Hawkeye to drink. After taking a sip, the surgeon announces, "I'm glad you came back. I missed you."

"You're delirious," Margaret replies knowing Hawkeye will not remember anything either of them says. The surgeon merely nods before mumbling that he loves her. Quickly, Margaret hides the shock on her face, especially when she notices Hawkeye is asleep. Making sure no one is looking, Margaret whispers, "I love you, too."

Breathing a sigh of relief, Margaret realizes just how much the words feel less like a weight. Kissing his forehead, Margaret heads to her tent telling Radar to wake her if she is needed.

Once everyone is well, Margaret breathes a sigh of relief. Busy in surgery less than a week later, the nurse tries her best to keep up with the rush, but finds herself unsteady. When she does not hand over the correct instrument to Hawkeye, he looks at her curiously.

"Are you alright, Major?" He questions. She nods, but goes to her tent right after her shift. Lying on the bed, Margaret closes her eyes to keep the room from spinning. Deciding she is well enough for dinner, the nurse exits her tent only to dash off to the latrine.

"Hey, Margaret, let's get you to bed," Hawkeye advises when he sees Margaret's wan complexion after she leaves the latrine. The nurse nods mumbling, "Okay, Ben. We can go to your room."

Rolling his eyes, the surgeon leads Margaret to her tent and helps her back in bed. Grabbing a washcloth from her vanity, Hawkeye goes to soak it in water before coming back. Placing the washcloth on Margaret's forehead. Thinking she is asleep, Hawkeye goes to leave when he hears Margaret tell him, "You would've made the best father."

Telling himself that she is delirious, Hawkeye merely nods before leaving her tent.


	6. Chapter 6

"Major! You're alive!" Hawkeye teases when he sees the nurse scrub in a week later. With a wink he adds, "Looks like the vaccine didn't work on either of us."

"No," Margaret replies standing next to him in surgery. "Um, I didn't say anything to you did I?"

Shaking his head, the surgeon lies, "No. Did I?"

She shakes her head before letting the man work. For a few days the adults are able to get back to a new normal until Hawkeye playfully tells Margaret he loves her to get a rise out of Frank. While Frank cries in indignation and Trapper continues to tease him, Hawkeye notices Margaret stiffen.

Later, the surgeon pulls Margaret aside when they work in Post Op to ask her what he tells her when he is sick. Shaking her head, the nurse answers, "You just thought we were back in New York."

"Did I–"

"No," Margaret reassures deciding not to tell him about his admission. "And just so you know, I like my civilian coffee black."

"I said all that?" He questions wondering what else slips out. Hopefully not that he loves her. He can barely tell himself let alone Margaret.

"Did I say anything?" Margaret questions knowing she has more secrets than he does. Shaking his head, Hawkeye answers, "Just that you thought you were going to my hotel room."

Shaking her head, Margaret states, "We need to get over that."

"I know," Hawkeye agrees as he rubs his neck. After a moment he holds out his hand. Confused, Margaret simply looks up at the surgeon. Deciding to continue, Hawkeye states, "I never fully introduced myself when I got here. Benjamin "Hawkeye" Pierce. Crabapple Cove, Maine."

Shaking his hand with a smile, Margaret introduces, "Margaret Houlihan, Army Brat."

With a frown, Hawkeye asks, "You don't have a home?"

"The Army is my home, Hawk."

She wants to add that he knows almost everything about her, but is fine with starting their relationship over. They need it after their unlikely history.

Slowly the pair become friends with an unsaid love between them, not that anyone else is aware. The only thing they do is fight less as long as Frank is away from them.

One night, Hawkeye falls asleep only to wake up in a cold sweat while images of a small child a combination of him and Margaret fades away. Getting up, the surgeon almost heads to Margaret's tent, but thinks better of it. Taking a walk to clear his head, the surgeon eventually returns to bed hoping he does not dream anything else that night. The next day, Margaret notices Hawkeye will not match her gaze during surgery. Concerned, she asks him what is wrong. Hawkeye merely shakes his head knowing he does not need to focus on Margaret's fever induced comment. Instead, he finds himself, Margaret, and Klinger at an Aid station twelve hours later. When he sees his new operating area, he wants to bolt. However, the lack of a surgeon prevents him from doing so. Making quick decisions and working with little to no jokes causes Hawkeye to yearn for the 77th. After hours of surgery, Hawkeye cleans up, eats whatever is in their rations, and hunkers down next to Margaret. After she lets him get settled, she states proudly, "'We did it.'" Getting as comfortable as he can, Hawkeye teases, "'My lips are sealed.'"

Dismissing his comment, the nurse asks, "'Do you suppose there are snipers out there?'"

"'If they're good union snipers, they are'," Hawkeye says as he scoots close to Margaret and covers her with a blanket. "'I want you to know, chivalry isn't dead. It's just been replaced by exhaustion.'"

Eager to fall asleep herself, Margaret leans closer into Hawkeye. Despite deciding to start over, there are some things she will never forget. His arms are one of them.

"'Good night, Captain'," She mumbles as she closes her eyes.

"'Good night, Major'," Hawkeye answers realizing again how much he loves her.

The next morning, Klinger wakes up to make a call to Radar that they are heading home when he notices Hawkeye and Margaret cuddled together.

"Should have brought a camera," He mutters before placing the call. Hanging up the phone, Klinger smirks at the Chief Surgeon and Head Nurse who are still sleep. Quietly, he crouches at the pair's feet before asking, "Got room for one more?"

Jolting awake, the officers scrambles apart.

"You can't tell anyone about this!" Margaret declares. Raising his hand, Klinger agrees as Hawkeye teases, "But Ferret Face will love it!"

Her disapproving look makes him grin, and Margaret can practically envision Michael.

Heading home is a more enjoyable experience despite Hawkeye's singing. Seeing the compound in view, Margaret is surprised when Hawkeye stops. When he kisses her on the cheek, Margaret easily smiles, but is painfully aware that she and Hawkeye need to establish ground rules for their new relationship. The past needs to stay in the past no matter how painful it may be to at least one person involved.

"Hawkeye, we need to set up boundaries," Margaret states when they are alone in supply the next day taking inventory. Turning from the shelf, Hawkeye tries to figure out where her train of thought is coming from.

"What?" He questions thinking their friendship is going as well as it can for them. Nodding, Margaret explains, "We need some ground rules if we're going to continue our relationship."

Wanting any relationship he can have with Margaret, Hawkeye agrees.

"First," Margaret begins, "I want you to know that I like our relationship, but I don't want it to go as fast as before."

Nodding, Hawkeye waits for her to continue. After a minute, Margaret adds, "This is stupid. I'm sorry I brought it up."

Doubly confused, Hawkeye questions her.

"I can't stop thinking about," Margaret stops before she mentions Michael, "our past. I don't think we can ever truly be friends."

"Platonic friends," Hawkeye translates. The nurse nods adding, "There is too much there. I just want us to get to know each other. If something comes of it, then fine."

"If not?" He asks. Margaret shrugs, "Then we continue to see other people."

"Yeah, okay," Hawkeye states confused by the seemingly random conversation. Awkwardly, the pair gets back to work and stays away from each other for the remainder of the day.


	7. Chapter 7

The pair dances around each other for months as Margaret goes back and forth between Frank and Hawkeye between the nurses. However, the pair continues to confide in each other before anyone else. Trapper notices, but keeps quiet thinking Margaret is simply one of his bunk mates new girlfriends of the week. He comes close a few weeks later to ask Hawkeye about his new relationship with Margaret, but ends up leaving without being able to tell his best friend good bye. Then, Henry's flight is shot down causing a loss among the entire camp. Slowly, Hawkeye makes his way through the compound and knocks on Margaret's tent door knowing that Frank is on a phone call.

"Hawkeye," Margaret says in surprise. Noticing the fatigue and worry in his eyes, the nurse lets him in her tent.

"I can't do it, Margaret! I can't be here without Trap!" Hawkeye laments as Margaret gives him space to pace around. "I've had too many people leave me without a word! Carlye, You, Trap? Why does this always happen?"

Sinking into the woman's cot, Hawkeye puts his head in his hands. Deciding not to ask about Carlye, Margaret simply bends down and puts her hand on his knee.

"It'll be okay," She whispers. "You have his address. You can actually see him again."

"Or I could leave it up to fate," He answers ruefully wondering if throwing her into the mix of AWOL friends and lovers is a good idea. Squeezing her hand, Hawkeye apologizes.

"Why? I left?" Margaret replies wondering why he has to take on the burden alone. Suddenly, Hawkeye's eyes light up. Margaret can see an idea strike him, but is surprised by a kiss on the cheek when he says, "Margaret! You're brilliant! I'm going after Trap!"

"Hawk!" Margaret starts as the surgeon leaves her tent. Pulling her robe tighter, the nurse watches as the man she loves runs for a jeep. The next day he comes back with a young surgeon named B.J. who magically and drunkenly knows who she is. However, any hard feelings she has toward Trapper's replacement quickly vanish. Settling in to a new doctor, Hawkeye and Margaret quickly come to like the man. He is happily married, which comforts Margaret knowing that he is one less surgeon who will make a pass at her. Hawkeye is simply happy he is not stuck with someone he can constantly compare to Trapper.

With the establishment of a new Colonel as well as a new doctor, the surgery unit quickly readjusts to the changes in camp. They all finally work well together when there is shelling at the orphanage causing Nurse Cratty and her orphans to stay with them for the night. Margaret eagerly takes to the children from the orphanage once they arrive feeling as if they fill a little bit of the hole Michael leaves. Settled in her cot with two of the children sleeping in her tent that night, the nurse is woken up by screaming. Running out her tent door after checking on the children, Margaret notices Radar screaming for help. Quickly, the nurse tells Radar to take the child he is carrying away as she takes the pulse of the expectant mother who was supposed to be in camp hours ago. Following after Hawkeye and B.J. who carry her to surgery, the nurse immediately changes into scrubs. After an assessment, Colonel Blake's replacement, Sherman Potter declares B.J. the lucky winner of the Cesarean performance.

"'Patient's ready'," Margaret informs Hawkeye as she ties her mask over her face while B.J. is given scrubs.

"'Fine, Major. Shall we make a baby?'" He asks seriously wondering if she will ever decide to properly have a relationship with him. Margaret's eyes go wide and she hopes Hawkeye just thinks it is a look of surprise instead of curiosity over his serious remark. Glancing back at the mother on the operating table, Margaret makes sure to swallow back tears before assisting Hawkeye with the wounded that come in.

Being led into The Swamp hours later by Frank, the nurse's eyes immediately scan Hawkeye and B.J.'s side of the tent and looks at the various trinkets they accumulate. Merely tolerating Frank now, the nurse is eager to see how Hawkeye lives. Her fun is over when Frank runs out of the tent accusing one of the children of stealing his medal. She yells after him, but knows she is due for her shift. A few minutes later, Margaret walks into Post Op to find a ceremony of sorts being given. When she realizes Hawkeye steals Frank's Purple Heart for the baby B.J. saves, she teases that she knows where the medal comes from.

"'Bite your tongue, Margaret'," Hawkeye jokes adding, "'Better yet, let me do it.'"

Already loving him, his act of thievery and gallantry causes Margaret to gain more respect and admiration for him. His flirting is helpful, too.

An hour later, the camp rounds up the children to head back to the orphanage, and everyone except Frank makes sure they get on the truck safely and says good bye to them.

"'Thank you for all your help, Major'," Nurse Catty tells Margaret who gets off the truck after telling the children good bye.

"'Thank you'," Margaret replies knowing the children heal her more than the orphanage nurse will ever know. Standing to the side, Margaret and a few other camp members wave the kids off.

"They're gone," Margaret remarks once she sees the truck gets out of the compound safely.

"Yeah," Hawkeye replies surprising Margaret. "You were really good with them."

"You were, too. You'd make an excellent father someday," Margaret truthfully replies. With a grin, Hawkeye flirts, "Was that an offer?"

When the nurse rolls her eyes, Hawkeye states, "I bet you'd make a wonderful mom. Besides, imagine what our kids will look like!"

However instead of playful banter, the surgeon merely sees Margaret turn and walk away. She has no desire to explain Michael to him. Even if the orphaned children heal her a little, she will always have a scar. Whether selfish or not, Margaret does not want Hawkeye to share that burden, too. What she fails to realize is he dies a few days later.


	8. Chapter 8

Walking out of the office, Hawkeye notices a man coming out of a truck trying to get his attention. Stopping, the surgeon listens to the man less than confidently state, "'I'm Lieutenant Detweiler, the Quarter Master Morgue Detail. I'm here to pick up a body. Who do I see?'"

Pointing to the company clerk's office, Hawkeye tells the man to see Klinger before walking off to take a shower. What he is not expecting is to see Lieutenant Detweiler come in the shower after him. He watches the man closely before continuing to apply shaving cream.

"'Is this the whole tent?'" Detweiler asks. Quickly, Hawkeye quips, "'And nothing but the tent.'"

He is in no mood for jokes when his father actually calls Korea to talk to B.J. instead of him. When he is handed a copy of his death certificate, the surgeon quickly rinses off his shaving cream. Grabbing his clothes and putting them on, Hawkeye verbally explains why his dad calls for his bunk mate. When the man on Morgue Detail complains that Hawkeye is supposed to be dead and that he will be put on something worse for messing up three times in a matter of weeks, Hawkeye asks what to call the man.

"'Digger'," He replies. Putting his jacket on, Hawkeye explains, "'I hate to inconvenience you Digger. I really do, but I happen to be alive. Born that way, you know?'"

However when Digger keeps insisting he needs a body, Hawkeye directs him to the mess tent before heading off to Colonel Potter's office. Thankfully, Klinger is put in charge of contacting Daniel Pierce leaving Hawkeye to avoid Digger as he follows the company around waiting for a body to drop. Complaining to B.J. during surgery, Hawkeye looks over once to find Digger standing near the door eating a candy bar. Addressing the Lieutenant with the unhappy news that there is no dead body for him to take back, Hawkeye hopes to be rid of him.

Thankfully, Digger leaves and B.J. proposes having a wake in honor of Hawkeye's death. The Chief Surgeon eagerly agrees when Klinger comes in suggesting a telegram be sent to Maine instead of a long distance call. Happily, Hawkeye dictates a message to Klinger who immediately goes to send it.

Exiting surgery, the man runs into Margaret who asks, "I heard you were dead!"

Grinning, Hawkeye says, "Dead tired, but not dead dead. Were you worried?"

Rolling her eyes, Margaret says that she is fine, but is thrilled to be invited to the party. She decides to go to the party after her shift in Post Opt, and can hear the party in full swing when she goes to do her job. Inside The Swamp, Hawkeye has the time of his life, drinking, eating, and flirting. However, his mood is dampened when Klinger comes by to announce that there are no calls or wires going in or out of the area.

"'I've gotta get through to him!'" The surgeon explains as Hawkeye explains that a visit from Eisenhower is preventing the call. At some point in the night, he curls up on his bunk to sleep off the party. Waking up, he finds B.J. writing a letter to Peg and decides to sit up and pour himself a cup of coffee. The morning is worse when Frank walks in. Then, Klinger comes in to tell him there is no way he will be able to get in touch with his father. Asking again, Hawkeye merely leaves the tent and wanders around the compound. Bumping into Margaret, he smirks, "You never came to the party last night."

She can tell his smirk does not match his eyes and asks, "Can't get a hold of your father?"

With a sigh, Hawkeye answers, "No! Eisenhower and Death prevent me!"

"I'm sorry," She empathizes. With a shrug, Hawkeye thanks her before heading to the mess tent for breakfast. Eating what he thinks is oatmeal, the surgeon merely smiles as people congratulate him on the party. At first, the party is fun, but the death jokes are getting old. What he really wants to do is get in touch with his father. Knowing he cannot really do anything, the surgeon decides to spend time with his living patients before standing in line for pay roll later in the day. When he gets no pay is when he really riots.

Unknown to him, Margaret marches into the company clerk's office and demands Klinger give her access to the phone. Making her way through various Generals and other higher ups, the nurse is able to get in contact with Crabapple Cove.

"Doctor Pierce?" Margaret asks once Klinger gives her the phone. Hearing confirmation on the other end, the head nurse continues "This is Margaret Houlihan from the 4077th? I just wanted to call and tell you that Hawkeye is alive."

Hearing the sound sound of relief from Daniel, Margaret's eyes mist over for a minute. Holding back tears, Margaret listens as Daniel asks her how she is privileged with sending the phone call.

"I felt it should come from someone who understood," The head nurse replies wondering why she says the words so openly to a man she only hears about. Chalking it up to Pierce charm, Margaret lets the man tell a few stories of Hawkeye's childhood before the smile drops off her face when he asks her name again.

"Margaret," The blonde answers. She can hear Daniel murmur her name before telling her he will await his son's phone call. Only a few minutes after the line goes dead is Margaret able to properly hang up with the man. Exiting the office, Margaret goes back to her work. Not until the next day does she get to see Hawkeye who unhappily trudges back into camp.

"What are you doing?" The nurse questions when he is closer to her. Shaking his head, the surgeon answers, "Not now, Margaret. I need to see if Klinger can get a phone call through."

"Hawkeye, I called your dad yesterday. Told him you were still alive," Margaret whispers sadly still thinking about Daniel's stories. She waits for some sort of backlash, but is surprised when the man is speechless unsure whether to be angry or elated. Finally, he asks how she gets the call through. A small smile creeps across Hawkeye's face when he realizes she is his lifeline to contact his father. The nurse waits for an exuberant thank you, but is shocked when Hawkeye's lips are on hers. Before she can even register the kiss, Hawkeye thanks the woman before running off to call his father.

Margaret follows the man knowing he will ask for her in a few minutes, and orchestrates the call. Once she is patched through, the nurse hands the phone back to Hawkeye.

"Dad?" Hawkeye asks when a voice answers the phone. Suddenly, his father starts crying explaining how a woman called him.

"That's Margaret, Dad!" Hawkeye announces. He nods answering, "Yes, that Margaret. She's right here. Do you want me to thank her for you?"

After a moment, Hawkeye turns to Margaret stating, "Dad thanks you for getting through to him."

With a small smile, Margaret answers, "Tell him he's welcome."

As Hawkeye continues to talk to his father, Margaret silently slips out of the office knowing Hawkeye needs alone time with his dad. A tear escapes her as she selfishly wishes the same for herself. As the day continues, the temperature starts to drop while the casualties get higher. Too distracted by her work, Margaret somehow tells Frank that she keeps all his letters to her. She thinks nothing of it as she heads off to her shift that night in post op unaware that she will be dealing with an all night surgery session. Walking into her tent after a ridiculous night of post op duty, Margaret stares at the scene of scattered papers that litter the area before screaming.

"'Frank! What are you doing?'" She exclaims. Frank merely gives a dazed answer as Margaret repeats herself. Knowing he is in trouble, Franks asks stupidly, "'Uh... Have you got a pencil?'"

"'A pencil?'" Margaret questions before making the man leave her tent. Surveying the mess, the nurse gently starts to pick up the papers. Reading each one to look at its contents, Margaret sighs in relief when she sees that Frank finds the correct box with his letters and not the ones to Hawkeye. Putting the letters back in the box, Margaret stowes it in her vanity before glancing at her desk. Sitting behind it, Margaret opens the top left drawer and gingerly picks up the first stack of letters. Reading over them, Margaret jumps when there is a knock on her door.

"Go away!" She calls expecting Frank to be crawling back to her.

"It's Hawkeye."

After a moment, Margaret tells him to come in. Noticing a few letters scattered about, Hawkeye goes to pick one up.

"Touch those, and I will kick you out," The nurse threatens. Nodding, Hawkeye puts the paper down.

"I just came to see how you were after Frank ransacked your tent," The surgeon admits. Looking back at the other papers, Margaret sighs.

"I'm fine, I guess. I just had important papers that I didn't want him to see."

"Ah, another lover?" Hawkeye teases. Margaret merely rolls her eyes debating on what Hawkeye is to her.


	9. Chapter 9

A few days after Frank ransacks Margaret's tent, there is a lull in the compound. With nothing to do, Hawkeye sits in the Officers Club eating pretzels and drinking cheap beer. It is not until the next day that he gets the bright idea to stuff as many people as he can in a jeep. Rounding up willing participants, he starts to work. Coercing one nurse inside, he sees Margaret and Frank come up making comments while Margaret tells him that he has one of her nurses. Telling her he will return her, Hawkeye goes back to work. After a minute he looks over at the nurse who stares at the chaos.

"'Squeeze in Major! There's still room'," Hawkeye states as he continues to help Nurse Grable in.

"'That is utterly beneath me'," Margaret insists even though she simply doubts she will fit inside. When Hawkeye tells her he is hoping for the honor to be beneath her instead, Margaret lets Frank become offended while she merely watches the insanity. Thoroughly entertained by Hawkeye's being dragged into the jeep, she does not notice Frank run off.

"Hey! You can't drag me in! I have to photograph this thing!" Hawkeye insists merely trying to escape the confined space. Getting out of the jeep, Hawkeye fits a couple more people in the passenger side before walking over to the driver's side. Noticing there is still room, Hawkeye tries to persuade Margaret to get in. He knows she has a playful side, and just wants her to express it more, especially since Frank seems to drag her into Regular Army shenanigans. When she agrees, he nicely pushes her behind the wheel.

"'Will you photograph my best side?'" Margaret asks once she is inside the jeep.

"'Absolutely'," He answers before hitting her rear and heading toward the camera. Setting the camera timer, Hawkeye quickly squeezes in beside Margaret with one leg out of the jeep. Happy to see Margaret smiling, he is less than thrilled when the head chaplain comes to visit turning any fun version of Margaret into the pretentious Frank loving Margaret he despises. Part of him wishes to be closer to her so that he can tell her how Frank makes her act. Instead, he remains impartial.

A week later, Hawkeye somehow ends up in a jeep with Frank and his crazed Army zeal. After performing surgery for hours straight and having to deal with Frank's complaining, Hawkeye is beyond annoyed. Finally getting back to camp with a few extra bodies, Hawkeye takes comfort in the fact that he can sleep soon. Sadly for him, he is stuck with Frank's racist remarks in the operating room, but is saved by Margaret being the nurse he operates with. They are both calm under the tension of the surgery and Hawkeye happily demonstrates his surgery techniques for Margaret. Even if she is still with Frank, Margaret can at least admire Hawkeye's surgical skills. What Frank has that he does not, the Head Surgeon will never know. Instead of dwelling too much on his own problems, Hawkeye finishes the surgery and tiredly steals one of the unused post op beds to sleep and keep an eye on his patient. The next morning, Margaret enters post op to find Hawkeye asleep on one of the cots. Knowing what and who he has to deal with in the last two days, Margaret takes the blanket at the end of the bed and begins to put it over him. When he suddenly wakes up, she can see the shock in his eyes and wonders what he dreams about.

"'I woke you, I'm sorry'," She apologizes. Sitting up, Hawkeye jokes that they can try again tomorrow. Brushing off the sexual comment, Margaret asks if he sleeps in post op all night.

He tells her he has before explaining how he keeps Colonel Spiker from dying. Impressed, Margaret commends his workmanship.

"'There's only one reason this man didn't die'," the nurse commends.

"'Yeah, HQ didn't cut him his orders'," Hawkeye states tiredly not in the mood for a compliment. He is still hoping to sleep again.

"'I've never seen you work better'," Margaret compliments still in awe over how much he cares for his patients no matter who they are. Moments like these make her question her choice in a lover at the 4077, especially since she and Hawkeye already have a history. Again, she commends him and tells him that she is proud of him only to have her comment turned into a joke. Then, she remembers why they are not together. Hawkeye merely likes to annoy her and flirt with her whenever he can. Still having feelings for her is not doing him any favors, and he knows it.

After checking on the Colonel later in the day, Hawkeye heads to Margaret's tent to apologize. When she lets him inside, the captain is shocked by her appearance. She looks upset, and his hand immediately goes to brush some hair out of her face. After he does, Margaret turns her head away from him. The gesture reminds her too much of when they first meet, and she is too confused about her relationships to fully look him in the eye. Only when Hawkeye formally apologizes for his callous reaction to her compliment, does she look up. Searching his eyes for any hint of a lie, Margaret finally thanks him. After a moment, he asks if she is okay. Nodding, Margaret replies, "I just need some time to think."

Not believing her, Hawkeye decides not to answer, and leaves her. Grabbing his lawn chair and taking it to another area of the compound, Hawkeye sits and watches the camp go by. B.J. finds him half an hour later and sits with him until her goes to get them a couple of beers. He comes back to find Frank searching around. Asking Hawkeye what Frank is doing, B.J. helps his friend make fun of their bunk mate who digs up a kimchi pot. Once Frank leaves in humiliation, Hawkeye and B.J. burst out laughing. Finally, the younger man states, "I have to write Peg about this!"

"Someone should tell Margaret she is dating a certified nut!" Hawkeye remarks with a laugh.

"Thinking of taking her for yourself?" B.J. teases. Hawkeye merely rolls his eyes secretly wishing the remark is not true. What he wants is Margaret to leave Frank for him.

Deciding to only be around Margaret when he has to be, Hawkeye tries to keep himself as distant as possible until Frank cries about his wife wanting a divorce. Slipping out of the tent once he is sure Margaret knows about the letter, Hawkeye heads across the compound. When he knocks on her door, Hawkeye notices Margaret is less than amused.

"How are you feeling?" He questions seriously. Margaret shrugs before letting him inside her tent. Slipping behind her desk, Margaret leans back in the chair before stating, "Frank's wife knows about the affair, if that's what you can even call it, now."

"That's still going on?" Hawkeye questions thinking the affair is over. Sighing, the nurse answers that it is.

"But you know how slow mail is," She humorlessly jokes. Nodding, Hawkeye adds, "I know."

"Hawk?" Margaret asks softly. "Do you ever think we should have started over?"

Confused, Hawkeye parrots her question. Sighing, Margaret explains, "I sometimes think that my relationship with Frank was wrong. That it shouldn't have happened."

"What makes you think that?" He asks trying to keep a self satisfied smirk off his face. After a moment he asks why she even dates Frank. Shrugging, the nurse responds, "He liked rules and regulations, and was the complete opposite of you."

"Still can't get over me, huh?" He teases. Shaking her head, Margaret counters, "Can you?"

Swallowing, Hawkeye looks at Margaret before excusing himself. The next day, he finds himself caught between his emotions for Margaret and his resurfaced emotions for a former girlfriend from med school who is sent to the 4077th.

"I proposed myself into a corner, Margaret!" Hawkeye exclaims as he sits in the head nurse's tent after leaving Carlye. Sympathetically, Margaret takes Hawkeye's hand wondering if he has a hard time forgetting all of his former girlfriends, or just the blonde ones. Running his hands through his hair, Hawkeye admits, "I thought I still loved her, but she left so suddenly! I never got a note."

Realizing why he is so upset over people leaving, Margaret whispers his name. Shaking his head, Hawkeye tells her he does not need the sympathy. Thanking her for listening to him, Hawkeye heads back to his tent only to confide in B.J. who asks, "What does Margaret have to do with this?"

Noting Frank's absence, Hawkeye explains his history with both Carlye and Margaret. Eyes wide, B.J. asks, "You slept with Margaret?"

Nodding, Hawkeye remarks, "Of all the camps, they had to walk into mine."

"Technically, you walked into Margaret's," B.J. corrects. Waving away the comment, Hawkeye states, "Same difference. It's just, Carlye brought out all these feelings, but I don't think they were for her."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the hiatus! I am continuing this!


	10. Chapter 10

The day after Carlye leaves, Hawkeye decides to emotionally distance himself from Margaret. However, blondes are still his MO. When Margaret returns to Frank for some unknown reason, Hawkeye finds himself with Nurse Able. However, he still cannot bring himself to stop thinking about Margaret. The feelings he has for her are different than Carlye. He wanted Carlye, but needs Margaret. Somehow he stops thinking about the head nurse as much until the camp finds out that Colonel Potter is going to be gone to Tokyo for a few days. Giving out instructions, Potter sets out to leave his office when he remembers to talk to Hawkeye.

"'Oh, Hawkeye, I almost forgot'," Potter remarks, "'Major Houlihan's appendix has to come out she wants you to do the job.'"

"'What about Burns and his 10 magic thumbs?'" Hawkeye asks. Finding out Margaret decides not to let Frank perform the operation, Hawkeye replies, "'Zorro will leave his mark.'"

Once the Colonel leaves, Hawkeye decides to make his way to Margaret's tent. Knocking on the door, the surgeon hears Margaret call, "'Go away, Frank! I told you not to bother me!'"

Deciding to mess with her, Hawkeye opens the door, leans in, and answers, "'Fuller Brush Man. I have a special today. A back scratcher in the form of a naked doctor.'"

"'Did I say come in?'" Margaret questions from behind her clothes line which acts as a barrier for both of them.

"'Only part of me is in'," He teases. "'The best part is still outside.'"

Exhasperated, Margaret asks, "'What do you want?'"

Fully coming into the tent, Hawkeye remarks, "'I didn't come to see you, just your appendix.'"

"'We can discuss my appendix in the O.R., post-op, anyplace but here'," Margaret demands afraid of what will happen if Hawkeye sees any stretch marks on her here rather than in a professional setting.

"'No, it's Wednesday. I always make tent calls'," Hawkeye jokes hoping she will relent and let him see just how bad her appendix is. Deciding to catch her off guard, Hawkeye looks at her and comments, "'You know, that robe does something for you. It does something for me too.'"

"'Watch it, Doctor.'"

"'I'm just a growing boy with active glands'," Hawkeye teases. Glaring at him, Margaret demands, "'When you're in my tent, you'll curb your glands.'"

"'Next time I'll leave 'em tied up outside'," The surgeon reassures. Fed up with his jokes, Margaret asks more to herself than to Hawkeye, "'Why are such skillful medical hands attached to someone like you?'"

Unable to resist one more joke, Hawkeye states, "'Sorry, I come as a set.'"

Sobering, Hawkeye admits, "'Potter told me about your problem. So, uh, Major, if you'll just lie down there.'"

When Margaret refuses, Hawkeye states, "'Your lips say, "No, no, no," but your appendix says, "Yes, yes, yes."'"

"'My appendix does not bother me. When it flares up, I'll call you'," Margaret dismisses. Noticing her anger, Hawkeye states, "'You know, when you're angry, you look just like Victor Mature.'"

"'Please leave'," Margaret pleads.

"'Margaret, a pre-operation grope is essential'," Hawkeye teases. With a sigh, Margaret comes from behind her clothes line and begins to tell him about the pain as Hawkeye adds, "'And fun.'"

Finally, Margaret lifts up her shirt and quickly shows Hawkeye where her appendix is hurting before making him leave the tent. Jolting awake from the pain in the middle of the night, Margaret makes her way to The Swamp to wake up the head surgeon. Shaking his shoulder a little, the nurse announces, "'Pulse is rapid, temperature's up. I can't stand it anymore.'"

Teasing, Hawkeye replies, "'I'm ready. Your tent or my father's Chevy?'"

Prepping Margaret for surgery, Hawkeye notices her tension. Gently, he reassures, "Margaret, it'll be fine. I'll be here when you wake up."

She nods before Hawkeye puts her under, brushing her hair back as he lets her count backwards. Lifting up her shirt, Hawkeye stares at her abdomen for a moment noticing a couple scars or possible stretch marks he barely remembers from before. He traces the lines under the guise of feeling her appendix. Shaking his head, Hawkeye continues with the procedure before sewing her back up.

True to his word, Hawkeye is sitting beside Margaret when she wakes up. Noting her confused expression, Hawkeye remarks, "I told you I'd be here."

"The scar?" She mumbles. Teasing, the surgeon remarks, "No worse than all the others."

Seeing her eyes widen, Hawkeye adds, "You can barely see it, but I've heard of a cream that's supposed to make it nearly invisible."

Scoffing, Margaret murmurs, "I tried that. It didn't work."

"When?" Hawkeye begins to ask just as Frank walks into post op. Quickly, the surgeon leaves the cot before he can hear too many of Frank's disgusting endearments. Leaving Margaret's bed, Hawkeye looks after his other patients before circling back to Margaret.

"We meet again," Hawkeye remarks as he sees Margaret is still awake. She nods and asks about the patients.

"They're fine," The surgeon reassures her. "But don't worry about it. Tomorrow, we can let you recouperate in your tent and you'll be good as new in a few weeks."

With a sigh, the nurse puts her head against pillow and curses her misfortune.

Hawkeye studies Margaret closely over the next few days under the guise of doctoral professionalism.

"Hovering is a better word," Frank remarks when Hawkeye defends himself to B.J.'s question.

"I just want to make sure she's okay. She scared me in surgery a bit."

"Hey, I'd be scared operating on a friend, too," B.J. reassures his friend.

"I think he likes her," Frank sneers ignoring the men's remarks about his acting like a teenage girl.

As the two week mark after Margaret's surgery comes closer, the nurse corners the Chief Surgeon and finally asks, "Did I say anything while I was under anesthesia?"

She has a fear that knowledge of Michael slips from her lips, and breathes a sigh of relief when Hawkeye answers, "No, but I don't remember any scars on you before."

Glaring at the man, Margaret defends a little too quickly, "You were drunk."

"I'll have you know I've always performed my operations with complete sobriety!" Hawkeye retorts knowing Margaret cuts him off from any access to the last two years. After a minute, he gently states, "We can't be friends if you keep closing yourself off."

"Maybe I don't want to be," The nurse whispers regretting the words as instantly as she says them. Seeing Hawkeye's face fall, Margaret tries to speak to him, but she knows he is shutting her out now. With a heavy sigh, the nurse heads toward the Officers Club.

Sulking in his tent, Hawkeye tries to ignore any of B.J.'s cheerful whistling. Noticing the Chief Surgeon's mood, the younger man asks, "Why so glum chum?"

He is a little surprised by Hawkeye's lack of expression and instantly realizes something is seriously wrong. Sitting on his bunk, B.J. questions what is wrong with his friend. Running his hands through his hair, Hawkeye replies, "Margaret. She said she doesn't want to be friends anymore."

Wondering how he ends up back in grade school, B.J. takes a deep breath. After a moment he asks, "What happened?"

Shrugging, Hawkeye explains the situation without going into too much detail about his and Margaret's one night stand. Absorbing the information, B.J. tries to keep his best poker face. He knows Hawkeye is keeping something from him, but decides not to pry. Instead he encourages Hawkeye to talk to Margaret. With a scoff, the surgeon remarks, "That won't lead to anything but disappointment."

"Okay, what if I talk to her?" B.J. asks. Getting permission, The younger surgeon leaves the tent and heads to the Officer's Club. Walking inside, he easily spots the blonde in the corner nursing a bourbon. After getting his own drink, B.J. goes to the back table and sits beside Margaret.

"Hawkeye's pretty upset over your conversation with him from earlier," B.J. remarks as he takes a sip of his drink. Shrugging, Margaret answers, "He shouldn't be nosy."

"He was worried, Margaret. Friends have a right to be worried over each other," B.J. defends. He notices Margaret's eyes glaze over for a minute and wonders for the first time if Hawkeye and Margaret share more than just a one night stand. Again, deciding not to pry, B.J. lets Margaret rant about the Chief Surgeon until she admits, "I didn't mean to say it."

She pauses a moment trying to best explain herself. After a minute she carefully begins, "His friendship is keeping me sane. Yours, too. Now. But, Hawkeye and I have never been good at communication. Frankly, we're better at miscommunication."

"So fix it. Communicate."

Shaking her head, Margaret smirks.

"You make it sound easy," She admits. Shrugging, B.J. volleys, "Maybe it is. No relationship is perfect, but communication helps."

The friends are quiet a moment until B.J. says a good bye and heads out the door leaving Margaret to push her drink away and put her heads in her hands.

Two hours later after operating on a patient, Margaret throws her scrubs in the laundry and takes a deep breath. Walking into Post Op where Hawkeye is doing rounds, the nurse stops him and asks, "Doctor, may I have a word with you?"

"Ne," He answers speaking what little Korean he knows and following Margaret off to the side.

"Hawk, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you. You were worried, but please don't keep asking me questions. If I want to, I will tell you about my scars, but not now. I'm used to doing things alone, and I need time."

The surgeon nods acknowledging her words. After a moment he remarks, "Remind me to thank Beej tomorrow morning. I can't lose our relationship."

"Me neither," Margaret admits. Smiling at each other, the pair goes their separate ways.


	11. Chapter 11

The next day brings another round of surgery as well as an impromptu bug out. Left with a spinal patient, Hawkeye elects to stay behind. He sits next to his patient waiting for clear signs of a recovery while the rest of the camp takes down tents and packs up the camp. Only when there are few beds left does he register how dire the bug out actually is.  
"'Kitchen's down'," Margaret states as she enters the almost deserted Post Op.  
"'Well, that's good news'," Hawkeye comments as Margaret hands him a cup of coffee. Telling him there is no more coffee to drink, Margaret watches the patient's breathing when Hawkeye remarks how bad the beverage is. Checking the patient's IV, Hawkeye tells the nurse, "'I'll be back in ten minutes. Then, you can leave with the others."  
Gently, Margaret demands, "'I'm staying.'"  
The pair may be on even footing for once, but in no way will she adhere to Hawkeye's request that she leave. However, instead of receiving a rebuttal, the nurse gets to hear Hawkeye tease, "'You've finally realized I have a beautiful body.'"  
Not in the mood for his jokes, Margaret defends, "'I've never seen your body!'"  
Both knowing she is lieing, Hawkeye alludes to their only night together by remarking, "'Every evening at eight thirty and matinees Wednesday and Saturday.'"  
Refusing to fall into his trap, the nurse asks to keep their relationship medical.  
"'You wanna play doctor?'" Hawkeye questions. He knows his remarks aggravate her, but he wants to keep Margaret safe. Despite all that goes unsaid between them, he still cares for her.  
"'Look, Margaret. I can handle this. Go on the truck and get out of here.'"  
"'I'm staying with you'," Margaret states before looking up at him. Knowing he is not going to win the argument, the surgeon replies, "'If you need me, I'll be packing up my troubles in my old kit bag.'"  
However, after finding out that all his stuff is gone, Hawkeye returns back to the deserted post op.  
"I thought you were getting your stuff?" The nurse questions when Hawkeye walks back in. Shaking his head, Hawkeye answers, "They took it all. How's the patient?"  
"The same," Margaret replies before Radar walks in telling them he is staying with them.  
"'Does the enemy rape female prisinors?'" Margaret asks after a round of shell fire falls an hour later. Reassuringly, Hawkeye replies, '"Margaret, there is no reason to be afraid.'"  
"'Aren't you scared?'" The blonde asks wondering how the surgeon can be so calm.  
"'Me? Scared? This whole body is one white knuckle'," Hawkeye admits. Still envious, Margaret answers, "'You don't show it.'"  
"'The minute this kid is stable and on the chopper, I may wet my pants and suck my thumb'," The surgeon states. After a moment, he asks, "Why don't we take turns keeping watch?"  
"Sounds fine by me," Margaret answers while stifling a yawn. She rolls her eyes, but agrees when Hawkeye announces he will take the first watch. She finds the best wall to lean against before drifting off. Waking up to a hand on her shoulder, Margaret has to reorient herself to the situation.  
"I'm up," She mumbles as Hawkeye helps her to her feet. As Hawkeye sits down, the nurse asks how their patient is.  
"Stable, no real change," He answers before nodding to floor. "That seat comfortable?"  
Margaret nods before taking residence on the chair next to the soldier. Radar comes in once to check on them, but for the most part she is alone. Surprisingly, she never hears a sound from Hawkeye until he mumbles sleepily from the other side of the room, "'What's his blood pressure?'"  
Margaret tells him, but remarks, "'I thought you were asleep.'"  
"'I always wake up when a lady pumps her sphygmomanometer'," Hawkeye remarks. Standing, the surgeon adds, "'Besides, I don't sleep well on a soft wall.'"  
The pair continues to talk until Radar comes back. Noticing the patient's vital signs are good enough for him to be moved, the nurse, clerk, and surgeon transport the soldier to a chopper. Seeing the chopper off, the three remaining camp members head to the jeep. After everyone gets in, Hawkeye starts the engine and proceeds to leave. Stopping in the middle of the compound, Hawkeye takes in the camp possibly for the last time.  
"'A big hunk of our lives has been spent here'," The surgeon remarks after Margaret asks him why he stops.  
"'Yeah, just think of all the guys we've operated on'," Radar supplies a little in awe. Taking in the camp herself, Margaret becomes a little wistful as well.  
"'A lot of them didn't make it'," She hears Hawkeye say causing her to reassure him, "'Most of them did. You should be proud.'"  
Humbled by her words and amazed at the nurse's own abilities, especially staying behind, Hawkeye remarks, "'You too.'"  
Kissing her on the cheek, the surgeon hopes Margaret will stay calm. Knowing she cannot kiss the man back, Margaret gently tells him they need to leave. Suddenly, Hawkeye remarks on the lack of shellfire and bombing. Disturbed by the quiet, Margaret urges Hawkeye to get them out of camp when the jeep quits. As Radar gets out to check the engine, Margaret exclaims, "'I'm gonna be ravaged. I know it!'"  
"'Tell them you're with me'," Hawkeye jokes weakly before they all jump out of the jeep to find safety. Finding out their camp is coming back only a few minutes later, Margaret, Radar, and Hawkeye happily run off toward their friends. Thinking they may actually have a chance together as the pair talks to Colonel Potter, Hawkeye sadly watches Margaret turn into her usual self when Frank comes up to her. Resuming his usual persona, the surgeon jumps in a jeep with the nurses.  
Reveling in the still and his own bed, Hawkeye listens to B.J. tell him about the convoy and exactly how Klinger loses all his dresses.  
"'I'm gonna go help Margaret," Hawkeye remarks once they sit in a comfortable silence. Knowing Frank is off to supposedly be in charge of something, B.J. offers to tag along. Taking his martini glass with him, B.J. follows Hawkeye to the Head Nurse's tent.  
"Who is it!" Margaret calls when there is a knock on her tent door.  
"Just two Swamp rats hoping to help you get your tent back together," B.J. states. Opening the door, Margaret lets the men inside. The trio gets along rather well and Margaret happily tells them that she will go to Tokyo soon.  
"Good for you, Margaret!" B.J. praises knowing she needs the time away. Happy for her, but also wishing for some R and R after their stay alone at camp, Hawkeye teases, "Can I go with you?"  
Margaret simply laughs stating, "Tough luck! Colonel Potter asked me to do this three weeks ago!"  
However, any joy she has going into the trip, is trampled by Frank whining over her leaving. By the time she leaves, the nurse decides she will do her job, but have the best time she can while she is there.  
When Margaret comes back from her vacation, the entire camp soon finds out she is engaged. Frank is visibly upset, while Hawkeye grins wildly. It is the only thing he can do to keep from breaking down. Silently, the man questions what happens to their relationship, but remembers their agreement. Neither says anything about actually wanting a romantic relationship, so the Head Surgeon settles on being happy for Margaret. While Hawkeye keeps his dislike hidden, Frank actively expresses his outrage, namely by pricking Margaret in the finger during surgery. Volunteering to bandage her wound, Hawkeye leads the nurse to a basin of peroxide to clean the wound.  
"'That sadist'," Margaret remarks as Hawkeye fixes her finger. "'He did it on purpose.'"  
"'Yeah, well if he hadn't, I would've'," The Chief Surgeon answers. Margaret looks at him curiously trying to decipher any underlying feelings, and asks, "'What's that supposed to mean?'"  
Looking at her, Hawkeye states, "'It means you have the sensitivity of a Sherman Tank. Talking about the guy in front of Frank is a swift kick in his ego.'"  
He chooses not mention himself in that list before continuing both his minsitration and converstation, "'A target one can hardly miss.'"  
"'He's a grown man isn't he? Semi?'" Margaret defends. In retaliation mainly for his own hurt ego, Hawkeye pours peroxide on her cut causing her to cry out in pain. Nonchalantly, Hawkeye asks if there is something wrong. Narrowing her eyes, the nurse states, "'You did that on purpose.'"  
"'Well, you can take it. You're a grown woman. Semi'," Hawkeye mocks smoothly. Confused by his reactions, Margaret asks when Hawkeye begins to care about Frank. Remarking that it is a recent phenomenon, Hawkeye listens as Margaret reminds him how mean he is to Frank.  
"'Yeah, but never when he was down'," Hawkeye defends. "'Only when he wasn't looking.'"  
"'I'll always have a soft spot'," Margaret admits before explaining how Donald is metaphorically superior to Frank. Putting the cap back on the peroxide bottle, Hawkeye listens to her comparisons wondering where he fits in. As far as he is concerned, he means something to Margaret. At least, she does to him. Cleaning up, Hawkeye excuses himself saying, "I'll let you bandage it yourself."  
However when her engagement bliss becomes too much again, the men of The Swamp practically pray for intervention from her prattling.  
"'Morning, Princess'," Hawkeye states when he, B.J., and Frank sit beside her at breakfast the next morning. Still giddy over her engagement, Margaret never registers the sarcasm coming from the officers. That is, until Frank tells her he will trade her in for someone younger.  
"'If you'll exuse me, I'm going to go finish my letter'," The nurse remarks as she gathers her things visibly annoyed. Knowing their relationship is rocky now, Hawkeye teases, "'You need any help holding up your pen?'"  
She sends him a small glare before leaving the men at the table.


	12. Chapter 12

Although he is upset over her engagement, Hawkeye is happy to see a glimpse of the Margaret he meets in Central Park. She is still Regular Army, but he can look past that for now. He is just happy she is laughing a little more and smiling. Whenever he gets the chance, Hawkeye tries to flirt with her. She may be engaged, but engaged is not married in his books. Thankfully, she takes the teasing lightly and becomes closer friends with both B.J. and Hawkeye. Every now and then, Margaret feels old feelings resurface around Hawkeye, but is not too shy to not wear boxers to a poker game one night. She can catch him looking when she walks in for the game, but easily sits beside someone who is not him. Although she is flattered by the attention, Margaret is too afraid of what may happen if they get too close, especially since she is engaged. He still pays attention to her though. What surprises her most is when he notices her perfume after he blinds himself with the nurses' camp stove. Using the latrine, Hawkeye is unaware of Klinger leaving and Margaret taking his spot. Once he exits, he smiles happy to have the Major walk arm and arm with him. She is happy, too. Lying to Klinger about Colonel Potter needing him is purely selfish on her part. Secretly she is worried about him, and may still harbor some affection.

"'Where do you want to go?'" She questions once she corrects Hawkeye on the name of her perfume.

"'Mess tent'," Hawkeye answers adding as they start walking, "'Then after that we can go to your place and play Blind Man's Bluff.'"

Simply happy to see his sense of humor back, Margaret sarcastically answers, "'Savage.'"

Taking him to the mess tent, she stays with him until he starts singing to her. Then, she drops him off with B.J. for a quick escape. Never leaving him for long, Margaret still continues to check on him until he grabs her hand one afternoon. Stopping she looks at him questioningly. Gently, Hawkeye states, "Margaret, I'm fine. You don't have to keep checking on me."

Nodding, Margaret answers, "I know."

For a split second she imagines herself kissing him, but instead squeezes his hand in reassurance. However, she is the first to fully hug Hawkeye after he gets his sight back. The lingering hand on his back does not go unnoticed by either of them, but there is no time to share any awkward glances. Soon a portion of the camp members are going after Frank Burns.

A few days after his sight returns, Hawkeye and Margaret are given the task to check supply. Grumbling, Hawkeye remarks, "I just got my sight back and they want to destroy it again."

"Stop complaining," Margaret states as she heads into supply. Both tired from a long day of surgery, they try to quickly get everything finished. Instead they come up with terrible puns and jokes, which is a side of Margaret that Hawkeye is unfamiliar with. Smiling, Hawkeye commends her wittisisms.

"Is that all?" Hawkeye asks as he looks to Margaret who holds the clip board. Nodding, Margaret tells him the list is complete.

"Good," He states leaning against the shelf. The nurse parrots his words before setting the clip board down. Standing up from the shelf she sits on, Margaret stretches just a little to relieve any stiffness when she accidentally hits Hawkeye in the face. After he gives a small cry of pain, Margaret immediately makes sure he is okay. Brushing away any hair that impedes her vision of any bruise she gives him, Margaret assesses the injury. Smiling at her compassion, Hawkeye easily reassures her that he is fine. When she does not listen to him, Hawkeye takes her elbows stating, "Really, Margaret. I'm fine."

Searching for any trace of a lie, Margaret quickly gets lost in his eyes. Neither is aware of anyone coming into supply until a minute later.

"I just came for some penicillin," B.J. announces wondering if Margaret and Hawkeye are together due to how intense their gazes are. Stepping apart, Margaret deflects, "I'm going to head to my tent."

Nodding, Hawkeye answers, "I'm going to check on my patients."

However, following his Swamp mate, B.J. asks, "What was that between you and Margaret earlier?"

"Don't know what you're talking about," Hawkeye answers not wanting to explain his feelings for a woman he is only just now getting to know despite a whole night of getting to know her years ago.

"Okay," B.J. exaggerates knowing he needs to get back to post op. Wounded come in out for the the next two days until Colonel Potter decides to quietly get ride of the hepatitis Father Mulcahey somehow contracts. Stuck with check multiple camp members in a 24 hour period, Hawkeye soon grabs the necessary instruments.

Looking over a letter from Donald, Margaret quickly folds it up and puts it under a picture when there is a knock on her door.

"'Come in!'" She calls out hoping the person is not Frank.

"'I have to get a look at your body, Margaret'," Hawkeye states once he comes into the nurse's tent. She gives a halfhearted chuckle before teasing, "'Don't you wish.'"

Not in the mood for games, the surgeon tells Margaret to lay down on her bed so he can check her liver. Sitting at her dressing table, Margaret crosses her arms and refuses. She does not want the man to ogle her scars again, especially if she is awake for it.

"'Margaret, we may be facing a hepatitis epidemic. I have to examine you. You'll get a shot, too'," Hawkeye explains not wanting to do this as much as she, but equally happy to make a joke. Pointing her brush at him, Margaret counters, "'So are you, kiddo.'"

Deciding not to question the woman's use of 'kiddo', Hawkeye begins, "'Let's start small. Show me your eyes.'"

Unable to get a clear look, the surgeon asks her to step outside due to the tent lamp's yellow bulb. Surprised that it is not a joke, Margaret stands up to follow him asking, "'You're serious, aren't you?'"

"'Believe me! I wouldn't be going around poking people's livers if I didn't have to'," Hawkeye states as he opens the tent door. Margaret looks up at him so he can check her eyes. When Hawkeye asks her to stick out her tongue, the nurse disagrees.

"'How 'bout I show you mine first?'" Hawkeye volleys as he shuts the tent door and follows her back to her dressing table. He lets her check her own tongue, compliments it, and then asks for a vein so he can draw blood. While he draws blood, Hawkeye makes small talk about Frank and Margaret's fiance Donald. Finally, Margaret asks if she can confide in him. Hawkeye caps the blood vial while Margaret explains she is getting passive aggressive notes from Donald's mother. While she bends her arm to keep the pressure on the wound, the nurse grabs the letter she hastily hides under the picture. Reading the letter that obviously shows how badly Mrs. Penobscott thinks of her, Hawkeye points out, "'What difference does it make? He loves you. He's not in love with the chauffeur.'"

When it comes to giving her a shot in the butt, Hawkeye grins knowing she gets to give him a shot there almost a year ago. Quickly realizing what the man is grinning about, Margaret turns and pulls up the sleeve of her robe. Telling her she is taking the fun out of his current job, Margaret answers, "'That's right, I am.'"

"'Margaret, this is not merely a dream come true. Gamma globulin goes better in a person's caboose.'"

"'Not this person's'," Margaret remarks wishing he will just give her the shot already. His voice loosing any humor, Hawkeye remarks, "'Margaret, you're a nurse.'"

Knowing he is right, Margaret puts her sleeve down and reluctantly agrees. Pulling her pants down, Margaret asks that they get the shot done quickly. Hawkeye agrees, but not before verbally admiring her backside. Once he is finished, Margaret pulls her pants back up and berates him for ogling her. When he asks what she wants, she replies, "'Respect. Simple respect. I expect nothing more, and I'll accept nothing less.'"

Marveled by her words, Hawkeye tells her to use the confidence she shows him on Donald's mother adding, "'That attitude. Simple respect.'"

"'Maybe'," Margaret answers still not sure how to say something like that in a letter. She is also caught up in Hawkeye's eyes. Noticing some sort of adoration, Margaret is equally surprised when Hawkeye truthfully tells her, "'You know in some ways you really are magnificent. And not just on the outside.'"

"'Thank you'," She nearly whispers. However any nice moment they have is stopped by Hawkeye asking if she will give him a shot. Not truly angry, an amused Margaret asks the man to leave her tent. Respect stays in her mind, but she is unable to pen a letter for a few days due to wounded. As she sits with a few soldiers one afternoon, she tries to block out Frank and Hawkeye's bickering while the soldier tells her about how he receives his wound. Then, she pens a letter to his mother for him. Once the letter is finished, Margaret wishes the boy well before leaving Post Op. Walking back to her tent, she sees Hawkeye with a concerned look on her face. Sidling beside him, she asks if he is okay. Nodding, Hawkeye asks, "Are you?"

With a heavy sigh, Margaret answers, "I had to pen a letter for a soldier to his mom, and it made me think about what I want to say to Donald's mother."

"Yeah?" Hawkeye asks with an eyebrow raise. Nodding, the nurse answers, "I think I am going to ensure that we do not come from chauffeur and maid stock, but I doubt we'll ever have a good relationship like that boy and his mother."

"Well, we can't win them all, Margaret. Like I said, Donald loves you. That's all that should matter," The surgeon reassures even though he has his reservations. However, as Frank frowns and jibes, Hawkeye grins and bears Margaret's happiness to a family she may not actually fit into. She gives him a small smile and a thank you before heading off to her tent to write her own letter. Hours later, the nurse goes in for Post Op duty to find a soldier hit on her.

"'Do you know how many times I've heard that line?'" Margaret asks unfazed. It happens to her at least once a week, but usually more. Finally, she leaves the man and eagerly gives up some of her blood once her shift ends the next morning. However, as she lies alone in her tent, his words about an engagement being a trial period echo in her mind. When Frank mercilessly jibes that no wedding date and no ring means he forgets about her, Margaret is as determined as ever to see Donald again. Getting him to have a two day pass, Margaret happily throws her arms around Donald once he gets to camp. While Margaret and Donald take a walk around the compound, Hawkeye tries to hide his own disgust at the Father's remark about how well Donald and Margaret fit together. The snide comment in his mind tells Hawkeye that he can look just as handsome. Thankfully, B.J. does a mock play by play of the happy couple's conversation which distracts Hawkeye from his jealousy. What throws him over the edge is Margaret announcing her marriage will be the next day.


	13. Chapter 13

The day of the wedding, Hawkeye and B.J. sit together making jokes about how mad Margaret is about Donald's leg being encased in plaster after the impromptu bachelor party the night before. Happy to have a distraction from his misery, Hawkeye's feelings come full force when the head nurse walks into the tent to be married. B.J. keeps commenting, but Hawkeye cannot take his eyes off of her. As Margaret stands in front of Father Mulcahey beaming, Hawkeye somehow keeps himself from objecting. Thankfully a surgery comes toward the end of the ceremony expediting the process and dispersing the attendees, including the bride. Finally when the surgery is over, Hawkeye joins the crowd that congregates near the helicopter to take Margaret and Donald away. When she runs back to them, Hawkeye almost sees it as a sign of fate, but all she does is hug them one last time. For Hawkeye the hug is almost as bad as her leaving him outside a hotel, but instead of being melancholy, the surgeon watches the helicopter leave the launch pad.

A week later the camp is bombarded with wounded. With one surgeon AWOL and a head nurse on leave, the camp is running on fumes.

"'When is Margaret due back from her Honeymoon?'" Hawkeye asks as he assess wounded.

"'Two days'," The Colonel answers as the Chief Surgeon barks orders.

"'I wish I was with her'," Hawkeye announces anxiously regarding the amount of wounded around him and the lack of Margaret beside him. Pretending not to be jealous is getting worse by the day.

"'She's with her husband'," The colonel replies. Teasing, Hawkeye answers, "I wouldn't peek."

Thankfully, unbeknownst to the entire camp, Margaret comes back in the middle of surgery. Seeing her come into the OR, B.J. exclaims, "'Look who's here.'"

"'Uh- oh, Lulu's back in town'," Hawkeye teases with a song he sings to her with when they first meet. Margaret smirks from behind her mask, before telling Baker she will take over.

"'Mrs. Penobscott, it's a pleasure to have your finger in my work again. How come you're back here so early?'" The Chief Surgeon asks keeping himself from sounding jealous. As they continue to tease her, Margaret is thankful when the surgery is over. For two days Donald is the perfect, doting husband. Then, she talks with General Weiskopf and Donald leaves for a pretty brunette in the corner of the club. Disgusted by the general's offer to sleep with her about an hour later, Margaret finds her first flight back to Korea. Annoyed, the nurse walks back to her tent unaware of Hawkeye and B.J. head to Colonel Potter's office. Drinking with their CO, the surgeons talk about Frank's absence and an substitute surgeon. What Hawkeye is unprepared for is finding a surgeon he sees at a lecture over a year ago. Hawkeye tries to act like his usual self, and is thankfully saved from further conversation when Margaret comes in to tell them about a patient who needs another operation. With the four surgeons and head nurse heading toward OR, Hawkeye scrubs up and drags Margaret behind the curtain.

"The new surgeon is the pompous surgeon whose lecture I escaped," Hawkeye states. Confusion clouds Margaret's eyes until she asks, "The one from when we met?"

"The one and the same!" Hawkeye grins with false cheer. Eyes wide, Margaret states, "Wow!"

"Yeah, Wow is right! At least he doesn't know me," Hawkeye remarks as he watches a grin spread across Margaret's face as she thinks of the coincidence.

"Just for that smile, I wish I'd taken your hat back!" He teases happy to see her smile. With a mock expression of shock, Margaret answers, "You wouldn't dare!"

"Try me," He grins unaware of how close they get to each other during their conversation. Never noticing either, Margaret stares him down playfully.

"Stop flirting. We have surgeries to perform," Charles demands as he walks by unaware that one of the party is recently married. Excusing herself, Margaret goes to surgery leaving Hawkeye to face Charles' questioning gaze. Quickly, Charles shakes his head before heading into surgery.

Seeing Colonel Potter in Post Op after the surgery, Margaret finds out that Hawkeye and B.J. are packing her former friend's trunk. Knocking on The Swamp door, she hears one of them call out in terrible French, "'Entrez- vouz!'"

Entering the tent, Margaret explains, "'Colonel Potter said you were packing Frank's things. There's something of mine I'd like back.'"

"'I don't think that's possible'," B.J. teases as Hawkeye jokes, "'Margaret, please. We packed so carefully.'"

"'I bet'," She scoffs as she hears them ask what she is looking for.

"'The torn shorts are right on top'," Hawkeye tells her in jest. Only mildly annoyed, Margaret answers, "'I'll slap you.'"

"'Bully'," Hawkeye answers as she finds the object tucked inside one of Frank's shirts. She gasps when B.J. catches a glimpse.

"'This is none of your business'!" Margaret exclaims putting the picture closer to her chest. Curious, Hawkeye asks, "'What is it?'"

"'A picture of Margaret in a bikini'," B.J. answers for her. Quickly, Hawkeye asks if he can see it. When she refuses, he asks, "'Give you a nickel'."

"'No.'"

"'Show you where the horse bit me'," Hawkeye announces. Again, she refuses. Upset Hawkeye answers, "'Oh, come on. How does she look?'"

"'Beautiful'," B.J. tells him. "'A goddess.'"

"'Really?'" Margaret asks taking a peek at her photo just as her former lover exclaims, "'Oh! Yum! Yum! Yum!'"

"'You're spitting on it'," She complains.

"'I'm gonna faint'," Hawkeye dramatizes. "'Margaret, put it back. It'll keep him crazy.'"

"'Why torture him? Frank wasn't all that bad'," Margaret states.

"'Compared to what?'" B.J. asks.

"'Well, he's no Donald Penobscott'," Hawkeye remarks. Upset, Margaret replies, "'In some ways, Donald is no Frank Burns.'"

She turns to leave when the two surgeons stop her and ask if she wants to elaborate. When she refuses and heads toward the door, B.J. remarks, "'Might make you feel better.'"

Unsure of their actions, Margaret asks, "'Why should I trust you two?'"

"'Because we're all you've got'," Hawkeye answers as B.J. follows up, "'Because we care.'"

A slight pause ensues until B.J. offers her a drink. As the younger surgeon sits down Hawkeye leads Margaret to the chair and his bed.

"'Come on. Sit down. You don't have to tell us if you don't want to. But sit down. You look upset'," He tells her as Margaret sits in the chair. "'Have a drink.'"

"'What'll it be,'" B.J. asks, "'gin or gin?'"

Watching his friend take a sip, B.J. asks how the gin is. Margaret gasps and then chuckles before coughing out, "'Terrible. Thank you.'"

"'Something went wrong, didn't it, Margaret?'" Hawkeye asks gently wondering if Donald hurts her somehow. Looking closely at him, Margaret asks, "'Your word of honor?'"

"'Sure.'"

Nodding to B.J., Margaret asks, "'What about him?'"

"'Him too'," B.J. confides. Sighing, Margaret begins, "'Well the first two days were perfect. Then after that, it was like being on a honeymoon with my old auntie.'"

"'What happened between the second and third day?'" B.J. asks.

"'Nothing. We were having a wonderful time tennis, shopping. A lovely party that evening at General Weiskopf's.'"

She pauses a moment before continuing, "'Lyle was a charming host.'"

"'Lyle?'" The men question.

"'General Weiskopf. He's an old friend. We stayed up and talked and laughed until 3:00 in the morning'," Margaret explains before Hawkeye asks, "'Was the groom in the room?'"

"'Sure'," She states. "'He was right there listening.'''

"'What happened after the party?'" B.J. asks as Margaret answers, "'Nothing.'"

"'As in "nothing"?'" Hawkeye asks surprised, but a little satisfied. He has at least one thing over Donald.

"'He stopped talking. He stopped smiling. He stopped everything'," The nurse admits bringing Hawkeye back to the conversation.

"'As in "everything"? Well, Margaret, don't you think that's it?'" B.J. questions. Confused, Margaret asks, "'What?'"

"'That's probably it. Donald was competing with your whole past'," Hawkeye explains as B.J. adds, "'Some guys can't take that pressure.'"

"'The male libido can be a very fragile thing'," Hawkeye remarks knowingly. Feeling awful, Margaret laments, "'Oh, poor Donald.''

"'Oh, he'll get over it'," B.J. replies adding, "'It happens all the time.'"

"'Frank never had that problem'," Margaret remarks. Shrugging, B.J. states, "'Frank didn't need it. He had every other one.'"

"'Oh, I know. I know'," The head nurse states as she stands up and walks back to the open foot locker, "'Frank Burns was a little too "by the book" for you guys, but I personally have some very fond memories of our friendship.'"

She takes a last look at Frank's belongings before exclaiming, "'That dirty rat! My alarm clock. He said the bellboy took it. That fink!'"

"'Margaret, remember the fond memories'," B.J. says. Angry, Margaret yells before leaving the tent, "'Oh, I'll give him a fond memory.'"

Left by themselves, Hawkeye holds his glass up before looking at his bunk mate. With a small raise of both their glasses, Hawkeye salutes, "'Bottoms up, Frank.'"


	14. Chapter 14

When the camp finally tolerates Charles, Hawkeye commits the biggest snafu by insulting Radar. After receiving backlash from the entire camp, Hawkeye tries to talk to Radar again. Instead the clerk yells at him. Knowing he needs the stinging remarks, the Chief Surgeon sits outside the OR trying to figure out how he can make everything better. He always sees Radar as a younger brother, and operating on the young man nearly kills him. After talking with Charles, Hawkeye finds his was to Rosie's Bar. To his astonishment, Radar goes there too and the two are able to come to an understanding. Walking back to the camp together, Hawkeye talks things out with Radar a little more before leaving the clerk back at Post Op. Entering the compound, Hawkeye notices Margaret's tent light is on. Knocking on her tent door, he is a little amused to find the nurse with cold cream on her face when she answers. Feeling honored to be around her in such a state, the man smiles.

"Are you coming in?" Margaret asks annoyed and still upset that she does not get to yell at him. Nodding, Hawkeye enters the tent and asks, "Do you still have that Purple Heart? Radar's going back to work tomorrow and I thought I'd surprise him."

Surprised at the turn of events, Margaret asks, "You made up?"

Nodding, Hawkeye answers, "I gave the kid a beer, too."

A small smile appears on the nurse's face before she remembers what Hawkeye comes to her for. Rummaging through her desk drawers and vanity, the nurse finally finds the medal. Turning back toward her friend who now sits on the bed, she notices the somber look on his face. Tentatively, Margaret says his name and asks, "Are you okay?"

With a sigh, Hawkeye answers, "Now. I just felt so sick operating on him, you know? It just felt like my fault, and then when he held me on that pedestal? I lost it."

Nodding, Margaret walks toward Hawkeye to hand him the medal. Placing the Purple Heart in his hands, Margaret is surprised when Hawkeye leans into her. Smoothing the man's hair, the nurse softly asks if he is going to be okay. Nodding, Hawkeye straightens up and stands. Thanking her, the surgeon leaves the tent.

The next day, Hawkeye walks to the mess tent after pinning a Purple Heart to Radar happy their relationship is fixed. Finding himself next to Margaret a minute later, the surgeon acknowledges her.

"Major," He nods politely.

"Captain," She answers. "I just wanted to see how the medal ceremony went?"

Grinning, Hawkeye answers, "It went really well. Thanks for holding onto that for Frank."

Chuckling, Margaret answers, "Radar needed it more. I just hope everything is okay between you two again."

"It's perfect," Hawkeye says with a smile as he opens the mess tent door for the nurse and himself. Sitting together, Margaret and Hawkeye talk about Donald until B.J. and The Colonel come toward them.

"I heard Radar got a shiny medal," Colonel Potter remarks with a knowing look at Hawkeye. Shrugging, the man answers, "He deserves it."

"Oh, Margaret, there's going to be a new nurse coming next week. I take it you'll brief the nurses?" The Colonel asks changing the subject. Nodding, Margaret answers that she will.

Her new nurse however proves to be rather incompetent when after two weeks is still running out of surgery. Chastising her for the infraction after helping B.J. with the surgery the new nurse leaves, Margaret angrily gets out of her scrubs and heads out of OR. The Head Nurse's anger subsides when she easily befriends a stray dog in camp. For as much as she prides herself in having a tough demeanor, Margaret knows that children and animals are her weakness. Thankfully, the dog she befriends likes to come around when no one can see her softer side show. However, the dog also pushes her to act tougher than usual, especially on her crying nurse. Toward the end of the week, the nurse even tries to get the crying nurse transferred. However, her mind is changed when the new nurse tells Margaret in Post Op that she will be as cold as Margaret is. Numb, the Head Nurse leaves Post Op wondering how her nurses actually see her. Walking to her tent, Margaret tries to tell herself that she has to be tough in order to lead.

While decompressing in her tent, Margaret spies her calendar. Noticing the date, the nurse immediately feels ill. Ill at forgetting the day as well as remembering it. With the knowledge that her son's birthday is today, the Head Nurse heads toward the mess tent hoping a change of scenery will help her. Eating alone, Margaret sets aside a bit of her food knowing the stray dog will want it. Taking small consolation in the animal lifts her spirits just a little until she overhears the nurses talk about the stray being killed by a jeep near the camp. With the emotions of the day washing over her, Margaret allows herself to quietly break down at the table. Swallowing, the nurse throws her trash away so she can cry privately in her tent. Almost bumping into Hawkeye on her way out, the nurse chokes, "'Excuse me, please.'"

Not used to seeing Margaret so upset, Hawkeye falls in behind her asking if she is okay. When she tells him to leave her alone, he remarks, "'What's your hurry? Let's talk a little.'"

"'What do you want?'" She asks turning to face him. He is partly to blame for tonight's disappointments. Always confused as to why Margaret never comes to him for counsel when he always comes to her, the surgeon states, "'Well, you look all choked up and I don't think it's the food.'"

"'I don't know what you're talking about'," Margaret downplays, "'And anyway, it's none of your business.'"

"'It might help to talk'," Hawkeye states adding he has two ears to listen to her with. Walking away from him, Margaret asks, "'Will you stop annoying me?'"

"'Fine! I thought something was bothering you and decided to help!'" The surgeon admits.

"'You're always trying to get into my head when there's there'," Margaret announces knowing she is lying. Her head is always filled with at least a little bit of Hawkeye, and she hates that. His talking to her is not going to help anything except the headache that is beginning to form in the back of her head.

"'Look, Margaret. Sooner or later this place gets to everybody.'"

"'I don't fall over, Captain'," Margaret insists, "'Everything around here would be just fine if there were a little less leaning and a lot more leadership. We need obedience. We need discipline. Not this chaos! Doctors like you constantly out of uniform! Nurses who don't belong in uniform! Dogs running around loose, and cats-'"

"'Dogs?'" Hawkeye questions following her rant until then.

"'Getting run over by jeeps'," Margaret finishes as her face falls and she begins to cry. Thankfully, all she has to do is walk in her tent to escape him. What she does not, but should, expect is Hawkeye following her inside. All she wants is to cry and simply be alone. Yelling at the surgeon to leave, she is infuriated when Hawkeye refuses stating, "'Your emotions are all churned up. You're not doing yourself a favor putting a cork on it! Let it out!'"

"'Let out what? There is nothing to let out!'" She exclaims always choosing denial over acceptance. "'I'm not churned up. I'm not emotional. If you want to cork something, cork your mouth!'"

Then Margaret tells Hawkeye to leave again even going so far as to take his arm to show him the way. Finally, the surgeon tells Margaret he sees her sneaking food to the stray adding, "'This morning he got run over? Are you telling me you're not upset by that?'"

"'I've got people dying all around me. You think I got upset because a dog gets run over?'" Margaret questions as if that makes the death of the stray any better. On a tirade the nurse adds, "'Why should I get upset about a little-'"

Trying to keep her composure, Margaret is quiet until she adds, "'About a little dog?'"

In this moment she wants to tell Hawkeye about Michael. She wants to tell him her fears, but knows that it will just lead to fights and questions she is completely unwilling to answer. Instead Margaret turns away from him and cries. Cries for the dog, her son, herself. Then, Hawkeye puts his arms around her, turns her, and lets Margaret cry into his fatigues. Wrapping her arms around him, Margaret revels in the embrace and lets all reservations fall away. She has no idea how long she makes him stand there, but finally looks up at him. Hawkeye's eyes fill will compassion as he sees the nurse's red eyes look up at him with a silent thank you. Brushing her hair back behind her ear, Hawkeye asks if she is truly okay. Shaking her head, Margaret answers softly, "But, I will be. Thank you."


	15. Chapter 15

The next week, there is a cold snap as well as advancing forces causing the entire camp to seek shelter in a cave. Much to Hawkeye's dismay, he still has to go. On the way to shelter, the surgeon continually tells himself that his fear is irrational and that there is no reason to be afraid of a cave. Despite his own reassurance, Hawkeye still asks to keep watch outside the cave. Inside, Margaret makes sure the patients are well situated and notices Colonel Potter and Father Mulcahey come back in. Hearing Hawkeye's name, the nurse asks them what is wrong with him. Shaking his head, Potter answers, "He just has a touch of claustrophobia. I've set him on sentry duty."

Margaret nods before going back to her work. Deciding to head to the front of the tent after she is no longer needed in the tight space, the nurse finds Hawkeye standing outside the cave. Calling his name, Margaret watches Hawkeye turn around and walk toward her.

"Joining the party?" He jokes to keep his mind off the cave. Nodding, Margaret sits down and motions Hawkeye to sit with her. Once Hawkeye is sitting beside her, Margaret asks, "How do you like sentry duty?"

Shrugging, Hawkeye remarks, "It has its advantages. But so does sitting here."

Rolling her eyes, Margaret asks, "Why don't I take over? You need to sleep."

Shaking his head, the surgeon answers, "I'll be fine. Use my blanket and get some sleep. They'll probably want you back in there soon, anyway."

Agreeing, the nurse grabs the blanket but bargains, "I'll sleep only if you stay here."

"At your service, my dear," Hawkeye teases before making himself comfortable and listening to Margaret's breathing even out. After about ten minutes, Hawkeye has to leave the tent again. What he is unaware of is Margaret is still awake. Unable to sleep due to the shelling, the nurse grabs onto Hawkeye's jacket sleeve to keep him from leaving. As she tugs him toward her, Margaret asks where he is going.

"'I'm going around the corner to get a paper and a larger room'," He answers sarcastically. Shaking her head, the nurse answers, "'No, no. Stay here. Come on. I'll sit with you.'"

As they sit together, Margaret wonders if sleeping is even a great option. She only knows that it calms her own fears, but never takes his coping mechanisms into consideration.

"'Do you believe in reincarnation?'" Hawkeye questions once they are situated. Confused, Margaret questions him. Nodding toward the inside of the cave, Hawkeye remarks, "'Looking in there makes me think of all the things I wouldn't want to come back as. A snail, an oyster, a turtle.'"

He gives a nervous half laugh and Margaret quickly realizes the surgeon is masking how scared he is. She listens intently as he remarks, "'Can you imagine me as a turtle? 'Fraid to get in my own shell? I'd die of embarrassment! All the other turtles laughing at me in my underwear?'"

"'I wish I was strong and brave like you, Margaret',"

"'Ha!'" She huffs, "'That's a laugh. As much as you want to get out of this cave, that's how much I want to stay in.'"

"'Oh? You like suffocation?'" Hawkeye teases.

"'With you it's closed in places. With me, it's loud noises. I've always been oversensitive to them. Trains? A car backfiring?'" She remarks just as a shell drops. Closing her eyes, Margaret is happy that Hawkeye is looking the other way. Once the noise dissipates, the nurse adds, "'Shellfire. I hate shellfire.'"

"'So naturally you joined The Army'," Hawkeye jokingly infers. Clicking her tongue, Margaret answers, "'To be a nurse. Every time a shell goes off I have to practically nail my feet to the floor to keep myself from running away.'"

As they start a comfortable silence, another shell goes off causing Margaret to close her eyes.

"'Don't worry'," Hawkeye reassures, "'that wasn't close.'"

When another shell goes off, the pair immediately hugs each other as Hawkeye remarks, "'That was close.'"

"'Boy, I can't leave you two in the back seat of anything'," B.J. comments as he walks toward them with a couple mugs of coffee. Still holding Margaret to him, Hawkeye jokes, "'Don't mind us. Just sitting under the rocket's red glare sharing our favorite unreasonable fears.'"

Walking closer to set the mugs down, B.J. remarks, "'I see it hasn't helped.'"

Handing Hawkeye a coffee, the younger surgeon adds, "'This probably won't either, but at least it's warm.'"

Taking the mug, Hawkeye immediately hands it over to Margaret knowing she probably needs it more than he does. His fear is currently on stand by while hers is right outside and as noisy as ever. Looking outside, Hawkeye remarks, "'This is every nightmare I've ever had coming true.'"

"'Hang on, the shelling can't last much longer. We'll be out of here soon'," B.J. answers reassuringly.

"'What are you saying? It's all that surplus ammo from World War Two they haven't been using'," Hawkeye jokes as he takes the mug from Margaret. "'I don't know how much more of this I can stand.'"

"'You'll stand it as long as I do'," Margaret insists as Hawkeye takes a gulp of the coffee. Her eyes widen as if to make a point. Looking over at Margaret, Hawkeye immediately sobers knowing that she is right.

"'Thank heavens none of us have to stand it alone'," B.J. reasons. Bolstered by his friend's positivity, Hawkeye comments, "'I know. And that's a great comfort as long as I'm sitting near an opening.'"

Being told by a nurse that his patient's blood pressure is dropping, Hawkeye stays still as B.J. decides to take over. Hawkeye starts to thank his friend before telling him, "'No, wait a minute. I'm a doctor and he's my patient. Let me try.'"

Putting her her hand on Hawkeye's arm, Margaret asks, "'Are you sure?'"

"'Of course I'm not'," The claustrophobic surgeon answers before getting up. Margaret watches Hawkeye leave with B.J. following close behind. Holding the mug tighter in her hands, the nurse concentrates on what is happening inside the cave instead of the shelling. Agreeing to help Hawkeye go back to camp, Margaret makes sure the patient is situated and hops into the jeep while trying her best to ignore the shelling. Only once Hawkeye runs to the entrance of the cave after only a few minutes with his patient is Margaret aware of just how awful his claustrophobia is. When he darts in and out a second time, Margaret is quick to get behind him and make sure he is okay. B.J. follows only to state that he will take care of his friend's patient. Hawkeye quickly refuses knowing B.J. has enough to worry about on his own. Soon, they come to the conclusion that Hawkeye will transport the soldier to the 4077 to get the proper procedure done. B.J. goes back into the cave to notify Colonel Potter as Hawkeye turns to Margaret and asks for one of the nurses. Selfishly not wanting to leave Hawkeye's side, Margaret tells him that she will go. He is the only calming presence she can find so far, and she is unwilling to leave him while shelling goes on around them.

"'Margaret'," Hawkeye begins, "'Stay here. It's a lot quieter.'"

"'I know, I know'," Margaret states, "'I'm crazy and I'll probably never forgive myself. But, I'm also the Head Nurse.'"

She will not be the one to stay behind to face what she is terrified of, and she tells him so.

"'You're a better nurse than me'," Hawkeye commends before Margaret leaves and he waits for a jeep and his patient. Once the jeep is ready to leave, the Head Nurse and Chief Surgeon get a few parting words from Colonel Potter before Margaret quickly starts the jeep and they head out. Hawkeye quickly puts himself over the patient to make sure nothing else can hit him and stays that way until Margaret is at their MASH unit. Putting the jeep in park, Margaret quickly jumps out and begins to help Hawkeye get the wounded soldier inside OR. Walking in as Margaret preps their patient, Hawkeye comments, "Some date this is."

Rolling her eyes, Margaret states that their patient is ready. Nodding Hawkeye goes to once side of the patient as Margaret goes to the other. Halfway through the surgery, Hawkeye notices the nurse begin to waver. He tries to keep her thoughts from the shelling, but with every demand and joke he makes, Margaret's voice wavers more. Finally, he employs a round of Twenty Questions to get her mind of the shelling and onto their patient. As he continures asking questions, Margaret stops him to note that the shelling is over. When Hawkeye announces that it may simply be a lull, Margaret counters, "'It's over! We made it!'"

"'We must be really brave'," Hawkeye states before they get back to work. Finishing on their patient close to an hour later, Margaret and Hawkeye take off their masks and gloves before transfering their patient to post op. They each keep watch over the soldier until Hawkeye tells Margaret she can go to sleep. Taking the cot next to Hawkeye's, Margaret asks, "Wake me up if anything changes."

"I will," Hawkeye answers with a yawn. Soon, he finds himself asleep as well. Neither wakes up again until the camp comes through Post Op. Being the first to wake up, Hawkeye gently wakes up Margaret.

"'They're home'," He tells her. Rolling over, Margaret answers, "'Oh, good. We'd better help.'"

"'Right'," Hawkeye responds knowing as well as she how much work there is to be done. Both make it to a sitting position before falling back to sleep again. They only wake up again when a few of the wounded need beds more than they do. Still running on fumes the rest of the day, Margaret and Hawkeye fight a bit as they work, but are otherwise fine. Finally getting out of his surgery scrubs, Hawkeye talks with his bunk mates and Colonel Potter when Margaret runs into the scrub room in a panic trying to find her wedding ring. After finding out that Klinger throws the ring out with the trash, Margaret stops talking to both the surgeons and Klinger. When a merchant comes into camp, Hawkeye and B.J. first find out that Donald is a cheapskate and Margaret's wedding ring is actually a mass produced Korean trinket, then decide to buy one and get it engraved with the same inscription.

"'Over hill, over dale, our love will never fail'," B.J. states. Noting the merchant's distaste at the sentiment, Hawkeye sarcastically answers, "'Yes, it is lovely.'"

After paying for the ring, the friends quickly remember their clamp and get one made as well. Finally entering their tent after buying thirty five dollars worth of stuff, B.J. comments, "I can't believe someone would get their wife a cheap trinket ring."

"Well, Donald is cheap," Hawkeye remarks as B.J. adds, "Peg's ring cost me a fortune! I finished paying it off a month before our wedding."

Three days later, Hawkeye and B.J. see the merchant again and get the ring and clamp from him. Stuffing the ring in his pocket, Hawkeye heads toward the kitchen with B.J. behind him. Finding Klinger washing dishes, the men soon tell the man that his troubles are over. Presenting the ring, the men tell Klinger that he has to give Margaret the ring since the man throws it away. Finally agreeing, Klinger presents it to an ecstatic Margaret. After making up a story, Klinger watches Margaret inspect the ring before hollering that it is a fake. As Margaret yells at him, Klinger finally explains that they give the ring back to help her and not make fun of her. Thoroughly chastised, the nurse puts the ring on her dressing table just as an announcement for wounded comes in. Working with Hawkeye again, Margaret states, "'Klinger found my ring.'"

Smiling behind his mask, Hawkeye tells her she will find it again. Giving the surgeon a knowing look, the nurse states, "'It's not the original.'"

"'Oh really?'" The surgeon remarks feigning innocence.

"'No, it's a cheap copy'," Margaret answers adding, "'And I like it a lot better. Thank you.'"

"'Any time'," Hawkeye states wondering what life would be like if he and Margaret did get married. Quickly banishing the thought both because Margaret is married and their night together needs to stay in the past, the surgeon asks how the nurse knows it is a fake. With a small smile, Margaret quotes, "'Over hill, over dale, our love will ever fail.'"

Behind his mask Hawkeye smirks thinking the inscription to be prophetic somehow, but decides to keep his mouth shut. Hawkeye may be jealous of Donald, but at least he gets to spend more time with Margaret than her husband does.


	16. Chapter 16

For the next few weeks the pair is happy around each other and they even run Rosie's bar for her when she is hurt. Then, their relationship comes to a halt when they are sent to the 8063rd to review the clamp that Hawkeye and B.J. create. Already in the jeep waiting for Margaret, Hawkeye is about to take off when Radar hands her a letter from Donald. Happily opening the mail, the nurse's mood instantly changes. Being stuck with an angry Margaret is not his idea of fun. He tries to ask her what is wrong knowing it is the letter she holds in her hands. The day only gets worse when they end up stranded in the middle of snipers and shell fire. Finding an abandoned hut, the pair duck inside only for Hawkeye to go help a wounded Chinese soldier. Wondering why he always has to put himself in harm's way, Margaret watches in fear as Hawkeye goes to assess the body. After he reenters the hut they take shelter in, a blast of shellfire lands Hawkeye on top of the head nurse.

"'You better get off me, buster!'" Margaret demands as Hawkeye explains, "'I think I got something stuck in my leg.'"

Margaret takes a look at the wound and is shocked by what she finds. Taking hold of his leg, Margaret tells him to wait.

Teasing, Hawkeye teases, "'Margaret, there's no time for that now. Look at my wound.'"

"'Oh, will you be quiet? You're hurt. Do you want some morphine?'"

Curious about what is in his leg, Hawkeye questions, "'How bad is it? I can hardly feel it.'"

"'You got a hunk of wood in there. You want me to take it out?'" Margaret asks. Annoyed and in pain, Hawkeye exclaims, "'Of course I do! If I want a souvenir, I'll go to a gift shop.'"

Nodding, Margaret explains, "'I'm gonna pour some alcohol on it. It might sting.'"

She can tell by his body language that he is nervous, but yells, "'Stop twitching! You're making this very difficult!'"

Deciding he'll take his chances, Hawkeye replies, "'Forget it. Leave it in.'"

"'Just hold still'," Margaret demands. When he obviously is still trying to move his leg away, Margaret yells, "'Will you be quiet and hold still? I can't get ahold of it. I don't want to make things worse.'"

"'No, me neither'," Hawkeye replies. After a moment, Margaret triumphantly takes the wood out of Hawkeye's leg despite his cries of pain. Nursing humor getting the better of her, Margaret asks if Hawkeye wants to look at the wood. Rolling his eyes, the man remarks, "'Don't be morbid. Just clean it off and put a dressing on it.'"

"'Let me give you a shot of morphine'," Margaret remarks knowing how bad the procedure will hurt.

"'Stop pushing the morphine'," Hawkeye complains knowing there is no time to get it out. Taking his reply into account, the nurse states, "'Okay, but this is gonna hurt a little.'"

"'That's all right. I'm tough'," The chief surgeon admits.

"'Uh-huh'," Margaret answers when Hawkeye screams. Rolling her eyes, the blonde admits, "'I haven't even started yet.'"

"'I'm just practicing'," He remarks. Fifteen minutes later, Hawkeye is limping around the hut as Margaret sits at the table in the corner staring at her letter. After a while, she apologizes, "'I'm sorry I insisted on going ahead when we started getting shelled.'"

"'Oh, that's all right'," Hawkeye remarks, "'You come from a long line of courageous military people. Insanity is hereditary.'"

"'I suppose I deserve that'," The head nurse admits.

"'No, you don't. I was being kind'," Hawkeye comments. Defending herself, Margaret replies, "'I was upset. I wasn't thinking clearly.'"

"'What's eating you, anyway? What is it, the letter?'" Hawkeye asks adding, "'What's in it?'"

"'Never mind!'" Margaret declares. She watches the man chuckle before asking, "'What are you laughing at?'"

"'I just remembered. You're gonna be sorry you were mean to me when you see what I brought'," Hawkeye teases. Not in the mood for jokes, Margaret mumbles, "'Probably a bottle of that liquid rat poison of yours. Forget it.'"

"'Ha-ha on you. Japanese scotch'," The chief surgeon declares. Her curiosity piqued Margaret quickly masks her interest by asking how good the scotch is.

"'How good does it have to be?'" The man counters. Silently agreeing, Margaret demands, "'Give me the bottle. Is that cup clean?'"

"'It can't be too dirty. Whatever's in the bottom is still alive.'"

"'Just pass the cup'," Margaret demands. They each drink the scotch for a moment before Margaret asks, "'Do you think we'll ever get out of here?'"

"'I was just gonna ask you the same question'," Hawkeye replies.

"'I don't like the war, you know'," Margaret admits. "'I hate it. I hate the destruction. The stupidity of the waste. The disruption of personal lives.'"

Knowing her anger lies with the letter she receives, Hawkeye asks what it says. Complying, Margaret replies, "'Oh, well It probably would, uh, hand you a laugh, actually. For instance This is only the beginning. 'My dear Darleen'."

"'Is that your nickname?'" Hawkeye asks. Margaret shakes her head and replies, "'No.'"

Confused, Hawkeye questions, "'Why is he calling you Darleen?'"

"'He's not calling me Darleen. He put this letter in the wrong envelope'," Margaret explains before reading, "'

'My dear Darleen. How long it's been since we walked together on the beach at Oahu. I can still see the moonlight splashing on your shoulders and hear the gentle whoosh, whoosh, whoosh of the waves.' His last letter to me dealt entirely with a self-loading semiautomatic submachine gun. My letter went 'clickety, click, click,' whereas hers goes 'whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.'"

"'And splashing moonlight'," Hawkeye adds. Glaring a little, Margaret continues, "'I know you've heard I'm married. I'm sure you'd like her. She's competent and a hard worker. 'She'll make an excellent hostess when we return to the States. All in all, a sturdy woman.' Sturdy!'"

"'Sturdy is nice'," Hawkeye tries to reason seeing the remark as more of a character trait than a physical attribute.

"'I mean nothing to him! If I were a half-ton truck, he'd be more lyrical about me'," Margaret exclaims, "'And the worst thing is this stupid woman with the ocean whooshing all over her toes is this minute reading the letter he meant for me.'"

"'I'm sorry, Margaret. You must really hurt'," Hawkeye replies not knowing what else to say. Still on her tirade, Margaret asks, "'Hurt? You know what it feels like to give your heart to somebody? To live just for a glimpse of his handwriting in the mail? To lose sight of his picture because you've covered it with lipstick? And then to find out you're sturdy? And then to have them lob artillery shells at you, huh?'"

Hawkeye wants to tell her he does, sans a picture and lipstick. By the time he gets his draft letter, the man loses hope that he will ever see Margaret again. After a moment, Hawkeye states, "'It's certainly been an interesting day. Margaret I wish there was something I could say to ease the pain.'"

"'I'm all right'," She deflects, "'I've always taken great pride in the fact that I can adjust to anything.'"

"'Why don't you get it out of your system?'" Hawkeye offers knowing now is as good a time as any to cry. Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "'I'm fine! Thanks for the drink.'"

Knowing how she must feel, Hawkeye offers her more scotch. Shrugging, Margaret replies, "'Oh, a sip, maybe.'"

To Hawkeye's disbelief, the blonde pours almost another full cup. After she finishes the contents of the glass, Margaret leaves the table and grabs a stick leaning against the wall. A moment later she states, "'I'll sleep over there. Oh, I think I should warn you If you come over here for any reason during the night, announce yourself. I intend to swing this to night.'"

The surgeon nods before making his own pallet on the floor to sleep on far away from the Head Nurse.

"'What? What? What?'" Hawkeye yells once he hears a shell exploding in the distance that wakes him up. Then, he registers Margaret calling out, "'Stop it! Will you stop it?'"

"'Margaret, wait a minute'," Hawkeye soothes as he crawls toward her.

"'We're people! You can't shoot at us like we're animals! You want to drive us crazy? You want us to go insane? Is that what you want?'"

"'Shut up!'" Hawkeye demands hoping no one will find them.

"'Why don't you let us have one hour of sleep in peace?'" Margaret asks tiredly. When another shell explodes, Margaret yells out, "'Stop it! Stop it! You don't even know whether we're Americans or Chinese or Koreans!'"

Trying to calm the woman down and knowing how much she hates loud noises, Hawkeye goes to put his arms around her as he demands, "'Margaret, come here.'"

"'I'm sorry'," Margaret aplogizes, "'I'm afraid.'"

"'Me too. So am I'," He admits. Burying her face in his neck, Margaret whispers, "'I don't like being afraid. It scares me.'"

"'Me too'," Haweye agrees as the nurse continues, "'I'd feel a lot braver if I weren't so scared.'"

A moment of silence ensues before Margaret pleads, "'Please hold me.'"

"'I'm holding you.'" Hawkeye states. Shaking her head, Margaret states, "'I can't feel it. Hold me. Hold me.'"

"'Margaret, I'm holding you'," Hawkeye replies as he holds her tighter. When another shell goes off, Hawkeye joins in as they both scream for the shelling to end. Ending their tirade, the pair's eyes lock and their old feelings resurface. In some silent agreement, the head nurse and chief surgeon kiss as if their lives depend on it. As they kiss, the pair releases any frustration they may still have toward their one night stand all those years ago. They figure talking can come in the morning. If there is one. When Hawkeye wakes up to light streaming into the hut and no sign of shelling, he is startled to find Margaret staring at him wistfully. They share a good morning, but Hawkeye has no idea why Margaret is acting so clingy and sweet. It honestly scares him a little, and he question if she is not suffering from some sort of concussion. Unknown to him, Margaret simply decides to act how she thinks his former flings would in her situation. As the camp womanizer, he must have a type. She merely figures blonde and clingy is his.


	17. Chapter 17

After bickering in surgery almost a day later after being taken to the 8063rd, the pair makes their unhappy trek back to camp. Not much is said between them, although they are now civil to each other. Finally coming back to camp, Margaret and Hawkeye happily revel in the camp's party. Everything is happy and fun until Margaret slaps him and stalks out of the tent. Retiring to their tents, Hawkeye hears B.J. as what the heavy handed slap was for. Giving him a cursory version of the affair, Hawkeye explains, "'I may have insulted her and I don't know what to do about it.'"

When B.J. tells his friend to talk to Margaret, Hawkeye shakes his head.

"'Yeah, well, I thought of that'," The Chief Surgeon states. "'Only, I'm afraid if we make up it's liable to start all over again.'"

"'Are you afraid of her or of you?'" B.J. questions knowing their night together years prior. Deflective, Hawkeye asks why he needs to be afraid of himself. Proposing that Hawkeye has feelings for Margaret, Hawkeye quickly dismisses the claim. However, as B.J. teases his friend, the Chief Surgeon finally admits, "'Well, actually, while I was screaming and yelling at her a while ago, part of me was remembering the night before.'"

Surprised at his friend's honesty, B.J. again tells Hawkeye to talk to Margaret. Taking B.J.'s advice a few minutes later, Hawkeye heads to Margaret's tent to ask how she is. Knocking on her tent door, Hawkeye announces himself and waits to be let in. Standing from her cot, Margaret goes to open the door.

"'Hurry up. Don't let anyone see you'," The nurse demands still reeling from the affair. She wants to forget the whole thing, especially the memories that resurface.

"'Nobody saw'," Hawkeye reassures her as he closes the tent door.

"'You can't hang around my door like this. You want people to talk?'" Margaret questions afraid for both her marriage and reputation. She is able to keep the effects of one night together a secret, but has no idea how to do so a second time in a war zone. Understanding her dilemma, Hawkeye explains that he wants them to be on the same page. Softly and deliberately, Hawkeye lies, "'I don't think anything could come of us because we're so different.'"

It hurts him to lie to her this way, because he is well aware that they can be together. He wants to be with Margaret like they were in 1948, but knows that is impossible now. They are still reeling from their recent night together, and he is not going to cross the impossibly thin line they set for themselves. More so, Hawkeye wants the nurse to be happy, and he doubts an affair no matter what their past history will change that. Truthfully, Hawkeye states, "'Something happened to us out there. Both of us. Maybe we cared for each other more than either of us would like. I don't see why we can't own up to that. We might even turn out to be friends.'"

Hurt by his words and unaware how much they will sting, Margaret quickly denies they even have feelings for each other, especially in regard to the affair. Confused by her dismissal, Hawkeye asks, "'Wait a minute. Nothing happened? Is that what you're trying to tell me?'"

"'Not unless you took advantage of me while I was drunk'," Margaret replies making Hawkeye wonder if they are still talking about the same night or the one from over two years ago. A small laugh escapes him as he jabs, "'You know? For a minute I was afraid I might like you too much, but I don't think I have to worry.'"

Knowing he hits a nerve, Hawkeye begins to leave. Quickly asking the surgeon to stay, Margaret tells him to sit down. Sitting across from him on her army issued cot, the nurse easily agrees to be friends. Not sure where the conversation is going, Hawkeye waits skeptically for the nurse to continue. Apologizing, Margaret states, "'I'm not a very open person sometimes.'"

Understanding the woman's reservations and feeling as if they are backsliding in the odd relationship they carve for each other at the beginning of the war, Hawkeye explains that nothing will be different for not only themselves, but also for Margaret and Donald. He never means to hurt her in either 1948 or 1951, and he will take the chance he has to smooth over the whole misunderstanding while he can. From experience with the same woman, Hawkeye knows that waiting is a terrible option. To his surprise, Margaret remarks, "'Oh, I don't expect things to be the same with Donald.'"

"'You're not leaving him are you? All he did was accidentally send you a letter he meant for somebody named Darleen'," Hawkeye states. "'I'm sure the one he meant for you is just as nice.'"

With a gleeful smile, Margaret tells him about and reads the letter she writes to Donald in retaliation. As she reads aloud, Margaret lets all of the feelings she has for Hawkeye pour out before closing with a thank you to the figurative 'Hank'. Touched by how much Margaret respects him, Hawkeye answers, "'Thank you, Darleen.'"

After a moment of reflection, Hawkeye states, "I'm glad we can be friends now. I don't think what we had before was friendship."

Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "It wasn't, and I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. It takes two to tango'," Hawkeye teases causing a smirk to spread Margaret's lips. Quickly she remarks, "Don't I know it."

Noticing some type of hidden meaning, the surgeon gives her questioning gaze before Margaret tells him good night. He returns the remark before leaving her tent. Looking down at the letter in her hand, Margaret shakes her head deciding not to send it off. Instead, the nurse stands up and puts the letter in the top drawer of her desk with all the other letters she writes to Hawkeye over the years. Maybe one day she will finally stop closing herself off, especially to the man she first knows as Ben Pierce.

Although they remain friends, Margaret and Hawkeye decide to keep their distance and figure out what a real friendship will look like between them. That same week, Hawkeye and one of the nurses are swapped with a surgeon and nurse from the 8063rd. Ecstatic, at seeing an old friend from her childhood, Margaret insists that Lorraine Anderson stays in her tent. Catching up, Margaret admits to Lorraine how bad her relationship with Donald is.

"I'm sorry, Margaret," Lorraine sincerely states knowing how much Margaret wants a normal life after Michael. That night after they turn out the lights, Lorraine asks her friend, "Did you ever get a hold of the man from the park?"

With a sardonic chuckle, Margaret answers, "No, but the war made sure I did. He's the Chief Surgeon here. Got swapped for Dupree."

Now sitting up, Lorraine remarks, "You're kidding! Does he know about him? Michael?"

Shaking her head, the Head Nurse casts her friend a somber look.

"No," She answers. "I don't want to hurt him. Besides, we've been through our own rough patch recently and are just becoming friends again."

Hearing silence, Lorraine figures the conversation is over when she hears her best friend confess, "I slept with him."

"Central Park guy? I know."

Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "No, less than a week ago in a hut before we came to your outfit."

"Margaret," Lorraine whispers wondering what hold this man has on her friend. Before she can ask questions, the blonde adds, "I also just got a letter from Donald saying we can work things out. I leave day after tomorrow."

Sincerely, the 8063rd nurse wishes her friend luck before they go to sleep. Whether it is luck with her marriage or with Hawkeye, Margaret has no idea.

Driving back into camp the next day, Hawkeye grins at the familiar scenery. After he parks, he helps the nurse who goes with him out of the jeep before grabbing his bag. Stepping away, Hawkeye hears a voice call his name. Turning, he smiles when he finds Margaret walking back to her tent. Her hair is wet and she has her robe on, but is positively beaming.

"Miss me?" He teases. Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "A little. But, the nurse we got? My best friend, Lorraine!"

"How 'bout that!" Hawkeye exclaims as Margaret has him follow her back to her tent adding, "You told me about her when we first met, right?"

Nodding, Margaret replies once they enter the tent, "She was actually the only person I told about you."

"You told someone?" Hawkeye asks. Sitting down to brush her hair, Margaret replies, "I had to tell someone! You didn't tell anyone?"

Shrugging, Hawkeye replies, "Just my dad."

The nurse stops brushing her hair to turn and look at him. Memories of her phone call with Daniel and Hawkeye's own phone calls makes her see the man's accidental death in a new light. Empathizing with Hawkeye, Margaret asks, "You miss him a lot, don't you?"

Hawkeye nods before asking about his replacement. Smirking, the nurse tells what she knows about him before stating, "You'd need to talk to B.J. and Charles for the rest. They only told me a little bit in the mess tent today, and everyone already knows about the horse."

"The horse?" Hawkeye asks intrigued. Margaret nods. After a moment, she tells him she needs to get dressed.

"Nothing I haven't seen before," The surgeon smirks causing Margaret to roll her eyes and push him out of her tent. Shrugging his bag onto his shoulders, Hawkeye walks back to the Swamp. He gets a warm greeting from B.J. and Charles when he walks into the tent before they ask how the 8063rd is.


	18. Chapter 18

Just as he gets used to being back at the 4077, Hawkeye gets a temporary promotion to CO when Potter goes off to a meeting. Margaret, after just getting back from her trip to Donald is in an especially good mood, if not to simply see her friend run the camp without Frank lurking around. As Hawkeye becomes more and more military in Potter's absence, Margaret relishes the scene. When the Chief Surgeon complains about B.J. going AWOL during a surgery, Margaret replies, "'I don't believe what I'm hearing. Since when did you join the Army?'"

"'Since it was left to me!'" Hawkeye exclaims as he continues working on his patient. Smirking, Margaret asks, "'If only Frank Burns could see you now. It's not so easy to be the clown when you have to run the circus, is it?'"

Annoyed by Margaret's sudden turn to comedy, the surgeon asks if she is finished.

"'Just one more thing'," The nurse remarks before saluting her friends, "'permission to say, 'it serves you right, sir!''"

After surgery, Margaret attends to Post Op while some of the surgeons and her nurses get some sleep. After checking on the men, Margaret sits at the table in the corner to write any notes that a doctor may need about their cases when she hears one of the soldiers cry out in pain and call out to her. Assessing the damage, Margaret gives a reassuring smile before leaving the room. Walking into OR from Post Op, Margaret regretfully walks over to Hawkeye who tries to catch some sleep on one of the surgery tables. Gently waking him, she professionally asks, "'Doctor?'"

Then, she says his name. Hawkeye wakes up to find Margaret standing over him and jokes, "'Oh, Margaret! It can't be heaven, I've only been dead five minutes.'"

Still exhausted he turns back over. When Margaret tells him he has to wake up, the surgeon replies, "'The second wave isn't here already.'"

"'No'," She agrees, "'One of your patients tore open his sutures. Post operative vomiting caused by the ether.'"

"'Alright, get him back in here'," Hawkeye states still unwilling to get up. Margaret replies that the patient is being prepped before she helps Hawkeye up. Still tired, the surgeon asks Margaret, "'And get me something to lean against while I'm operating. Preferably, you.'"

Hearing the last part of his sentence Margaret smiles. For all the bad her marriage comes to, a stronger relationship with Hawkeye is the good.

When Potter comes back, the main surgeons and the head nurse are told to come in the CO's office. Finding out there is need for a soldier at the front, Hawkeye ends up being volunteered. Scared out of his mind, Hawkeye rights the quickest will ever written while on a break from wounded. Writing down his father's inheritance, then B.J.'s, the surgeon stops when he notices himself write Margaret's name. His hands shake as he realizes what he really wants to give her is any money his father doesn't inherit, but knows that is too personal a gift for a friend. Especially, a married female friend. As another shell goes off, Hawkeye quickly writes down that he gives her his Groucho Marx glasses. When Margaret reads about the gift, she is a little upset. Figuring she means more to him than a pair of glasses, the woman stalks back to her tent. Angry, the nurse throws her door open still trying to understand the glasses. Deciding to distract herself, Margaret notices a few papers on her desk that need attention. Setting to the task, the nurse soon goes in search of a pen when her eyes lock on the drawer with Hawkeye's letters. Looking through them, Margaret realizes she may never get to tell him what he actually means to her. She also remembers she is married. Shaking her head, Margaret puts the letters away before standing up and going about her day. Unable to stop thinking about how Hawkeye is doing, Margaret makes herself physically ill. When Hawkeye does come back safe a few days later, the nurse is quick to hug him. Going past the border of friendship, they lock eyes in some sort of silent communication. With a smile, Margaret whispers, "I'm glad you're okay."

Smiling back at her, Hawkeye remarks, "Me too."

As the weeks continue, Margaret notices her becoming physically ill while Hawkeye is gone is becoming an everyday occurrence. Then, when she skips her period, the nurse is terrified. She cannot believe that she is pregnant. Her mind instantly flashes back to three years ago when she finds out about Michael, but quickly remembers this baby is quite possibly Donald's and not Hawkeye's. Neither is the best scenario. Margaret and Donald are far from working their problems out and she and Hawkeye are no where near ready to have another go at a relationship. Keeping the secret for another few weeks to simply see if she is wrong, the nurse finally breaks down to Hawkeye one day after surgery. Frustrated that she cannot untie a simple knot on her mask after snapping a more than a few people that day, Margaret is surprised to find Hawkeye stand behind her. She can feel his hands against her neck as he teases, "'Oh, Margaret, let me give you a hand. This may take a minute. I'm used to doing this in the dark.'"

"'Go away'," Margaret insists hoping he will leave her alone. Instead he continues to untie the knot in her mask. Annoyed, and not at all happy for her future, the nurse complains, "'I just wish you people would leave me alone!'"

"'Oh, yeah? Like the way you left Nurse Bell alone? I was doing my job! You never fall on a nurse that hard for such a nitpicky mistake.'" Hawkeye counters adding, "'You're too good for that. What's eating you?'"

When she dismisses his question, Hawkeye finally coaxes Margaret into telling him what is wrong with her. Making sure no one is around and with a few false starts, Margaret announces, "'I'm pretty sure that I'm pregnant.'"

Eyes wide with excitement, Hawkeye asks while Margaret keeps shushing him, "'Pregnant? You mean with child? Expecting? Our little major is gonna have a minor? That's wonderful!'"

Realizing she wants him to be quiet, the surgeon apologizes.

"'There's nothing wonderful about it'," Margaret answers only seeing further problems not only with Donald, but also with herself. A selfish part of her wants to keep the memory of Michael untainted. She is unsure if she will be the best mother to this child, especially with her past. Seeing the worry in Margaret's eyes, Hawkeye asks, "'Are you kidding? All we see around here is death and destruction. Now, in the middle of an inferno that even Dante wouldn't buy tickets to there's a little glimmer of life thanks to you. That's not wonderful. That's a miracle.'"

Margaret wants to cry at Hawkeye's exuberance. He is ecstatic at the thought her having a baby– possibly his, again – and guilt courses through her. Knowing how great a father he may have been and how she still has the letter to tell him about Michael, the nurse tears up. Brought out of her thoughts, Hawkeye asked if she took a test.

Shaking her head, the nurse listens as Hawkeye tells her to set one up. Declining the offer, Margaret explains that she does not want the entire camp to find out. Nodding, the Head Surgeon decides they can do the test with a rabbit. The next two weeks are agonizing as Margaret becomes increasingly indecisive about even wanting a child, let alone with Donald. Thankfully wounded come to take her mind off her troubles until the day Hawkeye and Margaret steal the OR for a definite diagnosis. Anxiously, Margaret watches Hawkeye look through the microscope to give her her answer. Finally, the surgeon states that the test is negative.

"'Congratulations. You're still a major, Major'," Hawkeye jokes. With a smile, Margaret remarks, "'Yeah. I guess I still am. Thank you. Thank you very much.'"

"'I'm glad it turned out the way you wanted it to'," The surgeon tells her happy that there will not be a child to bind Donald and Margaret together.

"'So am I'," The nurse replies happy to stay with her friends and not be a housewife with a man she is sure she does not really love. However, both are all too aware of the other possible outcome.

"'I'm also sorry'," Hawkeye comments knowing there is a possibility the child not to be is his. Remembering Michael and all the joy he brings her, Margaret replies, "'So am I.'"

Left in their respective lulls, the friends decide not to talk about the subject or to each other. So far removed from each other, the surgeon only hears through his friends that Margaret's father is coming to town.


	19. Chapter 19

Knowing only Margaret's rose colored version of her father, Hawkeye is surprised to find out just how military the man is. Howitzer Al makes Margaret look reasonable, especially as she makes the camp crazy with her strict, Army regulated cleaning. When Margaret introduces her father to the head surgeons and CO, Hawkeye shakes the man's hand and greets, "'Any father of Margaret is a father of mine.'"

Letting out an uneasy laugh, Margaret decides to send her father elsewhere. She never tells him about Hawkeye three years ago, and decides to keep it that way. Guiding the General away, Margaret is well aware of at least one pair of eyes on her. Hawkeye simply notices how hard the nurse tries to please her father. For Hawkeye, the relationship between Margaret and her father upsets him. He never has to do anything to know his father loves him. Margaret tries everything. However, a side of beef that a patient gives Hawkeye and B.J. preoccupies the Chief Surgeon's mind instead of Margaret's father. At least until surgery. As the Head Nurse whispers to him to stay professional, Hawkeye tries to keep her calm. Instead she turns and knocks over a tray of instruments. Hawkeye can see the hurt in her eyes and immediately wants to march up to Howitzer Al and tell him how great a daughter he has. That night, Hawkeye and B.J. decide to go to the officer's club and immediately spot Margaret's father.

"'Come on. For Margaret, let's go make nice'," Hawkeye tells B.J. when they decide to sit with Al and The Colonel. Hawkeye tries not to say much, but is fully disgusted by the older man's attitude, especially when he storms off after yelling at them for something no one even brings up.

"'I hope you both are satisfied you louses!'" Margaret yells when she sees them in the compound the next morning. Angry, she begins telling them how her father is leaving and all the things the men did to him. Trying to calm her down, Hawkeye and B.J. soon realize the effort is futile when she sees Klinger wheeling beef around the compound. Deciding to find her later that day, Hawkeye is pleased to find his friend in a happier mood.

"Hey," He says sliding in beside her in the mess tent. "You seem happier than before."

Nodding, Margaret replies, "He's proud of me, my dad! I did a lot to disappoint him in the last year or so."

"Sorry about that," Hawkeye sheepishly apologizes. Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "It's not all your fault. I did enough to lose his trust."

Hawkeye nods before telling her he is getting something to drink adding, "You want anything?"

Shaking her head, Margaret admits to drinking some coffee already. Hawkeye nods before heading off to get his own cup.

"I always said that if I had kids, I'd tell them how much I loved them until they were sick," Margaret reveals once Hawkeye comes back to the table and sits opposite her. A smile graces her lips as she remembers Michael cuddling against her as she coos how much she loves him. Noticing the nurse's soft smile, Hawkeye almost asks her what she is thinking about. Instead, Margaret quickly remembers who she is sitting with and asks, "Was the meat you confiscated at least worth all the effort you put into it?"

With a huge smile, the surgeon answers, "Sure was! We're having a feast tonight! Igor's pulling out all the stops! White table cloths, real plates, and mushrooms!"

"Mushrooms!" Margaret questions happy to have an edible and identifiable vegetable. "I'm hungry already!"

After the feast, a bunch of the officers and enlisted sit around and talk. Slipping out, Margaret decides to walk around the camp while there is still some daylight left. Noticing Hawkeye coming back to the Mess Tent, Margaret gives him a smile thanks him for the food. Flashing his own smile, Hawkeye replies, "You're welcome, but Klinger and B.J. did most of the work. What brings you out here?"

Margaret shrugs.

"I just wanted to take advantage of the peace," She answers. "I usually took walks after dinner when I was in the states."

"Yeah?" Hawkeye asks as he begins to walk beside his friend while she continues, "Sometimes I'd stop at a park or something when it was just me."

"A lot of suiters state side?" Hawkeye teases. Swallowing, Margaret answers, "Something like that."

The friends stay quiet for a moment until the nurse asks, "What about you? What did you do stateside?"

Shrugging, Hawkeye answers, "Dad and I usually sat outside on the porch if was nice enough and talked about our days. When I was a kid I'd do my homework out there while he helped me and told me stories."

Chuckling, the surgeon adds, "I remember one time I decided to surprise my dad and come home early one semester during med school. I snuck under the porch and knocked against the wood. I'm pretty sure I almost gave him a heart attack."

"Your dad seems like a really good man," Margaret remarks. Nodding, Hawkeye answers, "He is. Raised me for most of my life after my mom died. The first girlfriend he had after my mom, I think I was fourteen? How she put up with me for so long I will never know. Addy was her name. She was the local librarian in town. She was actually the woman who gave me a book I actually wanted to read. My dad and I read Last of the Mohican's together when I was a kid, but it wasn't until I read The Great Gatsby that I really started liking books."

"And ended up becoming a world class Casanova?" Margaret teases. Smiling at her, Hawkeye replies, "No, that was the Clark Gable and Cary Grant films."

She smiles a wide smile as she asks, "Why didn't you tell me any of this when we first met?"

"I was too interested in you," Hawkeye answers. "You'd just been in Australia. How could I compete with that?"

"I don't know. Your life seemed more than interesting to me," Margaret remarks. "I grew up an Army brat, Hawk. I didn't have a home. I'm a little envious, honestly."

Shrugging, Hawkeye almost replies when he hears B.J. call his name. Noticing the nurse's face fall, Hawkeye states, "We should do this again."

"If there's ever a lull again," Margaret answers dryly causing her friend to smirk before he runs off toward B.J. at the other end of the compound.

"Pretty cozy there," B.J. teases once his friend catches up to him. Hawkeye merely rolls his eyes knowing the exchange is friendly. He and Margaret are finally on even footing again, and he hopes they stay that way.


	20. Chapter 20

Over the next week, Hawkeye and Margaret start to walk together around the camp just to talk to each other. Quickly, the pair realize that lack of communication is still a problem for them. As Hawkeye walks Margaret back to her tent one night, the surgeon states, "I'm really enjoying these walks."

Smiling, Margaret answers, "So am I. We should've done it sooner."

"Yeah," He says with a smile. Leaving each other, Margaret curses her marriage once again for her unhappiness. The next day, the camp is quickly tasked with securing the camp when Radar tells the Colonel about a bad storm that is coming in. In full Head Nurse mode, Margaret makes sure her nurses are doing their part to help. Checking on the women at their different stations, the nurse finds out that Bigelow is missing. Rolling her eyes when she finds the woman at Hawkeye's tent, she quickly tells the woman to get to work. Watching Bigelow walk toward her post, Margaret goes to see how she can help. Hearing a crash, Margaret quickly runs over toward the water tower to help the injured. Finding Bigelow is one of the victims makes Margaret sick. Once Hawkeye comes in, she quickly calls him to her side where he assesses Bigelow's injuries. When he realizes the nurse is bleeding internally, Hawkeye tells Margaret that he will operate.

"'I'm assisting you'," Margaret states feeling she needs to help right the wrong she causes.

"'Right. Play hard to get'," Hawkeye jokes feeling the stress mounting. Margaret gives him an odd look before heading off to scrub up. During the surgery, Hawkeye listens as Margaret calls out what is needed in the surgery and is impressed.

"'You're reading my mind'," He remarks. Seeing her apologetic look, the surgeon reassures her, "'Margaret, your nurse is going to pull through, but you're going to have to let me be the doctor.'"

Nodding, Margaret agrees adding that she is a little on edge before handing him the scissors. Thankfully, Radar comes into surgery asking about his guinea pig to ease any tension. However, when Hawkeye tells Margaret it is time for bandages, she quickly leaves the OR.

Sitting outside the operating room, Margaret comes close to crying as she finally starts to fully blame herself for her nurse's condition.

"'You alright?'" Hawkeye asks once he unties his mask and sits next to his friend.

"'Fine'," Margaret automatically responds, if a bit terse. Taking off his surgical cap, Hawkeye answers, "'Try again.'"

They know each other too well for games. With a sigh, Margaret apologizes and answers, "'It's just, I've never had one of my nurses hurt before.'"

"'Look, Margaret. She's going to be okay'," Hawkeye reassures for what he guesses is the millionth time in an hour. Margaret sighs again wondering why she has to be so hard on herself.

"'P.S., thanks you you'," The surgeon adds before Margaret puts her head on his shoulder. Thinking about holding his friend to him, Hawkeye is thoroughly upset when wounded soldiers start to come in. Taking her head off of Hawkeye's shoulder, Margaret listens to how the men are hurt before going with the men to scrub up.

After the surgery, all the doctors and nurses clean up and head to their tents. Hawkeye, after checking on his patients, leaves the recovery ward and walks through the compound. Noticing Margaret's light is still on, he knocks on the woman's door.

"You okay?" Hawkeye asks once the Head Nurse lets him in. Nodding, Margaret answers, "Is Bigelow?"

"Just fine. You could've stayed," He remarks as the nurse lets him inside. Shutting her tent door, Margaret simply shakes her head adding, "No, it's my fault."

"Margaret," Hawkeye begins thinking this conversation is over. Shaking her head, Margaret insists, "It is my fault! If I hadn't been so- so- so overbearing, this wouldn't have happened!"

After he watches his friend continue to rant and put herself down, Hawkeye finally yells, "Enough!"

Eyes wide, Margaret turns to the surgeon in surprise. Realizing he has her attention, Hawkeye remarks, "If you hadn't been so overbearing nothing would have gotten done. If you hadn't been so overbearing, another nurse would have taken her place. Margaret, you couldn't prevent this!"

Margaret simply stares at him as the words sink in.

"But, you can make her feel better," Hawkeye states. Silently, Margaret nods before whispering, "Thank you."

Grinning his trademark smile that wins her as soon as she sees it three years ago, Hawkeye answers, "Any time."

The next morning, Margaret gathers a small make up bag and slips it to Bigelow the next morning. After Bigelow thanks her, Margaret goes back into her regular nurse mode not wanting anyone to think she is soft.

Thinking her week cannot get any worse, Margaret tries to place a call to her no good husband only to find out he requests a transfer to San Francisco. Fuming, Margaret exits the clerk's office and ends up wandering around the compound trying to decide the best course of action. Starting to kick cans across the compound to abate some of her anger, the nurse nearly bumps into Hawkeye.

"'Outta my way, Pierce'," The nurse shouts. "'I'm gonna kick every can in this camp!'"

Still angry about not being able to get out of the army due to an updated points system, Hawkeye throws his own misery into the ring by exclaiming, "'Hey, hey! I don't know what set you off, but I'm not in the mood!'"

"'Of course not'," Margaret scoffs. "'It means nothing to you that my husband got himself transferred back to San Francisco for good!'"

"'Margaret, they changed the rules on us again!'" Hawkeye exclaims trying to push her anger aside. Disregarding his comment, Margaret exclaims, "'He ran out on me!'"

Still on his tirade, Hawkeye grouses, "'We'll be here forever! We'll be here longer than forever!'"

Quickly, Hawkeye registers Margaret's words. Officially concerned for his friend, the surgeon lowers his tone asking, "'What do you mean he ran out on you?'"

"'He lied to me. He kept saying we could work things out. And then to prove it, he went sneaking off. He couldn't even face me, the dirty, miserable weasel!'"

By now she is crying and wants nothing more than to crawl into her tent instead of displaying her tears in public.

"'What are you going to do?'" He asks. Decidedly, Margaret answers that she will officially get her divorce.

Shocked, Hawkeye consoles, "'Margaret, I'm sorry.'"

"'It's my fault. Look at the place I picked to have a marriage!'" The woman sobs before watching Hawkeye run off to a jeep. Confused, Margaret asks as the surgeon walks off, "'What are you doing? Where are you going?'"

"'I'm going to Panmunjom.'"

"'What?'"Margaret asks in disbelief.

"'I'm going to the peace talks'," He declares before jumps in the jeep.

"'The peace talks? Why?'" Margaret asks missing out on the unjust point system conversation from earlier. Hawkeye starts the engine to the jeep he confiscates before yelling, "'To stop the war!'"

While waiting for Hawkeye to come back, Margaret helps B.J. prepare for the party they have at the mess tent. Decorating everything in red, which Hawkeye declares is anti- green, B.J., Margaret, and Klinger stand back to admire their work.

"I think it's missing something," Klinger comments. With a laugh, Margaret exclaims, "Red!"

"Margaret, everything in here is red," B.J. states. Shaking her head, the nurse explains, "Red clothing, red food, red punch."

"Red hair," B.J. jokes, but quickly sees the glint in Margaret's eyes. When Hawkeye finally comes back, B.J., Margaret, and the rest of the camp are already enjoying the party. As soon as the Chief Surgeon enters the tent, he is greeted with drinks and later an already tipsy Margaret.

"'Welcome home, you crazy galoot!'" She exclaims as Hawkeye brags, "'I did it! I told them all! You should have seen me. I was terrific.'"

Stepping away from a bit of the crowd, the surgeon tells Margaret, "'Hey, listen, about your divorce, if there's anything I can do to help'?"

"'Best thing that ever happened to me'," The woman assures him. "'The weight of the world is off my shoulders. I feel like a new woman! It's all coming back the spirit, the confidence.'"

"'Oh, that's great! That's fantastic. That's just what I wanted to hear. I'm proud of you, Margaret.'"

Over the next couple months, Margaret happily works out the divorce proceedings, but is a little upset when the official papers arrive. When she is less than ecstatic, Hawkeye asks, "'Margaret, it's what you wanted isn't it?'"

Not getting a response, B.J. says her name and she answers, "'Yes. Yes! I've been waiting for months.'"

Thankfully any questions or comments are ended by Radar announcing choppers. As everyone gets up to leave, Radar tells her that he will plan a party. As she continues to read the letter, Hawkeye walks back toward her announcing, "'Miss Houlihan, you're on.'"

Looking up at him from the paper, Margaret almost deadpans, "'Yeah, yeah. I just can't get over the good news.'"

"'Right'," Hawkeye drawls out as they head to tend the wounded. After surgery, Hawkeye and B.J. invite Margaret to go with them to the Officer's Club to get a drink. Sitting at the bar and listening to the music, Margaret drunkenly tells them, "'Coming here was a good idea. And I've got to thank you guys for helping me to forget.'"

Leaning his cheek against his hand with eyes closed, Hawkeye asks, "'Glad to help. Forget what?'"

"'You know, my ex-husband. What's his name'," Margaret states with a laugh. Hawkeye laughs with Margaret while B.J. pretends he will not have a hideous hangover in the morning. However, by the next morning all fun and games are over.

As the old Margaret resurfaces in regular army mode, the camp has to quickly readjust. Then, she invites a General to see the new plan she implements for her nurses. When the General begins to flirt with her that night, Margaret quickly makes him leave. She may be single now, but she is keenly aware of how much she does not need a man. A part of her is reverting back to when she was a single mother, and she is rather happy about it.


	21. Chapter 21

Getting used to being single again, Margaret relishes her freedom until Donald refuses to give her her money. She is seething and cannot wait until the accounts are separated. In the midst of her waiting, a war correspondent comes to interview Charles and then ends up sleeping with Margaret. Finally feeling free, the nurse gently lets the reporter know that she is not interested in a relationship. A few days later she gets her own bank account again. That same week reporter Clete Roberts comes by to interview the camp. Everyone is crazy about a break in the monotony and between shifts different medical personnel and staff sit down with the reporter.

"'Our Head Nurse is really something. Major Houlihan, Margaret'," Hawkeye remarks during his interview. With only a hint of a smile, the surgeon asks, "'Did I mention she's really something?'"

"How?" Roberts asks. Deciding to keep the fun parts to himself, Hawkeye explains, "She's very dedicated. To the army, to us. She's good enough to be a doctor, honestly. Margaret, uh, she's fantastic. We couldn't run the camp without her."

Catching her looking at him, Hawkeye blows a flirty kiss in her direction. He can tell she is less annoyed than the beginning of the war, because she tries hard not to laugh at him. Still holding his gaze, Margaret mouths a thank you before ducking out of the tent. Later as she is interviewed, Margaret takes Hawkeye's words into consideration as she explains how much she learns about herself adding, "'I feel as old as I'm ever going to get. Older than I ever intended to be. And, I really can't wait to go home.'"

However, as she says the last words, a part of her realizes she does not really have a home. Thankfully, she is is easily able to leave after her interview. Distracted during her shift, Margaret quickly finds Hawkeye after Post Op duty. Thankful he is alone outside the mess tent, Margaret walks swiftly over to him and hugs him. Hugging her back, a confused Hawkeye asks if she is okay. He can feel her nod against his shirt before she lets herself out of the embrace.

"Did you mean it?" She asks him once she is looking at him. With a smirk, Hawkeye teases, "You're going to have to be more specific."

Swallowing, Margaret elaborates, "When you said I was really something. When you were being interviewed."

Tucking her hair back behind her ear, Hawkeye smiles widely.

"I sounded like a crazy person, Margaret. What do you think?" He asks. Seeing a tear escape her, Hawkeye asks what is really wrong. Her voice choked, the nurse answers, "I don't have a home."

Her face crumbling, she repeats, "I don't have a home."

As Margaret begins to cry, Hawkeye takes her in his arms. They stand still until his shirt is drenched and she apologizes.

"It's fine," He states. "You've been through a lot in the past few months. I'm hear for all your crying needs. Just say the word."

She quickly wants to take Hawkeye up on his offer when she is found under scrutiny by the U.S. government for Communism.

"'How could you think such a thing?'" Margaret yells once she is accused in Colonel Potter's office by Congressional Aide Williamson. "'I've always done my best to be a model American! I'm a commissioned officer in the United States Army.'"

Instead of helping her case, Williamson quickly explains how Communists have been found in both the State and Justice Departments.

"'At Woolworth's you'll find them in the Notions Department'," Hawkeye sarcastically jokes still trying to figure out how Margaret can be accused of Communism. Instead of a response or snide comment, Hawkeye finds the investigator is serious and soon asks Margaret about a man who happens to be an old boyfriend from college. Hawkeye gives a weary glance to B.J. from across the room. B.J. merely rolls his eyes as the stupid questions keep coming. They both want to help, but know there is nothing they can do except support her. However, as the questions become ludicrous, both Hawkeye and B.J. try to defend her. Finally, Williamson leaves the office telling Margaret he wants names of her old friends. The rest of the day she keeps to herself until B.J. and Hawkeye ask to sit with her during dinner.

"'Are you sure you want to be seen with me?'" The Head Nurse questions. Sitting by her, Hawkeye and B.J. listen as Margaret tells them about her friends and remarks, "'Those people meant an awful lot to me. How could I put them through a thing like this?'"

"'Hey, you can fight this guy'," Hawkeye states as B.J. adds, "'We'll help you get a good lawyer.'"

"'I can't do that. All I can do is resign my commission'," Margaret admits. When her friends object, the nurse states, "'It's not me. It's my father. He was so proud of me when I made Major. If I go before that committee? Win or lose, I'll be publicly humiliated. Maybe I could live with that but I could never live with what that would do to my father.'"

Upset by Margaret's lack of fight, Hawkeye tells her so. Eyes filling with tears, Margaret replies before excusing herself, "'I have no choice.'"

Leaving B.J. at the table, Hawkeye heads toward Margaret's tent to see how she is. Just as she lets him inside, Margaret hears a knock on her tent door. To the nurse's dismay, Williamson is on the other side to ask her a few more questions. Speechless, Margaret watches Williamson breeze into her tent and comment on Hawkeye's presence.

"I'm here for moral support," The surgeon quips trying to keep himself from punching the man. Nodding, Williamson motions for Margaret to sit in her vanity chair.

"How would you describe the gap in your military profile?" Williamson asks with no preamble. Margaret's mind flashes to an image of her son as Hawkeye interjects, "I thought this was about Wally?"

Unconsciously, the nurse glances at Hawkeye who nods his silent encouragement. Although he has no idea their son existed, Margaret takes comfort in his gaze.

"Answer the question," Williamson prods. With a deep breath, the head nurse lies, "I wanted to become a civilian. Obviously, it didn't work out."

She remembers making sure not even the Army knows about Michael.

"Or you were working with the enemy!" Williamson accuses. Margaret merely scoffs trying to picture an innocent baby the enemy. The nurse stands up hoping to leave, but instead, Williamson begins to accuse her of joining Wally Chrighton in the last few years.

"I haven't seen him since college!" Margaret defends. Part of her questions if Colonel Flagg is supposed to magically appear. It takes all of her self control not to make the comment. Once the investigator leaves, Hawkeye watches Margaret's face crumble. He goes to hug her, but the nurse shakes her head and walks away from him. Nodding, Hawkeye goes to leave. Entering The Swamp where both his bunk mates are, the Chief Surgeon exclaims, "Williamson came after Margaret in her tent!"

"What?" B.J. asks. "Did he not get enough of her earlier today?"

Smiling, Hawkeye yells, "Beej, I could kiss you! Charles, we need you to help with a plan we have to get Margaret out of this Communist mess."

Grinning, Charles asks, "How can I help?"

After informing Margaret of their plan, the men head off to the Officer's Club for drinks and soon defend Margaret to Williamson albeit with her past as "Hot Lips". The seed planted, the men watch Williamson walk out of the bar and hopefully head toward Margaret's tent. Margaret makes sure Klinger is properly stowed away in her closet when she hears a knock on her tent door. Opening it, she finds Williamson on the other side. When he tells her how her friends support and defend her, Margaret agrees when Williamson asks to go over the case again. Letting him in, the nurse knows the plan will work. She lets Williamson pretend he is seducing her and is thankful it only lasts for a minute before Klinger interrupts them leaving Hawkeye, B.J., and Charles to enter her tent. Once they explain that they will blackmail Williamson if he does not let the charges go, victory is granted to the MASH unit as Williamson exits Margaret's tent. Cheering, Hawkeye immediately holds out his arms to hug Margaret. She almost kisses him in joy, but quickly changes tactics.

"You're a really good friend," She whispers in his ear wishing he could be more. Smiling at the woman, Hawkeye answers, "So are you. Congratulations."


	22. Chapter 22

The next week a wounded soldier comes in that Margaret quickly has a crush on. Having only known the soldier as a casualty before he is awake and talking, she is excited when he finds an interest in her. They trade letters every so often until he comes back into camp and they really start to take the idea of a relationship seriously. When Margaret eagerly grabs for her letter one day, Hawkeye teases her and asks, "Secret Admirer?"

"For your information it's from Jack Scully."

"The Sergeant that came through with the wounded the other week?" Hawkeye teases a little jealous. He thinks he and Margaret actually have something after he helps her get out of her Communist scare. Plastering a grin, the surgeon lies, "Lucky you."

"I'm going to write him," Margaret announces before heading off to her tent. With a sigh, Hawkeye realizes he needs to let the blonde go. When a female, Swedish doctor comes to visit, Hawkeye and Charles are beside themselves. With both men competing for her attention, Hawkeye is smug when he wins. However, the victory is soon destroyed when Inga tells him that he needs to reevaluate his actions. For once his womanizing skills are not to his advantage. Margaret, sick of hearing his chauvinistic bragging finally snaps at him and motions that they leave the mess tent.

"'How dare you do that to me in front of a room full of people! I have to work with them!'" Hawkeye exclaims once he and Margaret are outside.

"'You'll work with them a lot better when you start treating them like people'," The nurse remarks upset over how she never notices the surgeon's chauvinism until now. Dismissing her remark, Hawkeye counters, "'Don't hand me that baloney. You're not standing up for her as a woman, you're really jealous of her, aren't you?'"

"'Jealous of her?'" Margaret sputters wondering if he does not have the situation turned around. She may have a lousy ex husband, but at least she is not always vying for someone's attention.

"'Olive green'," Hawkeye answers. Amazed at how big his ego actually is, the nurse asks, "'Over you?'"

When Hawkeye fails to respond, Margaret scathingly asks, "'You think everything revolves around you and your spectacular body, don't you?'"

"'You're raving'," Hawkeye deflects. Seething, Margaret yells, "'You think a woman is dead until she lives for you. Well, let me tell you something, Benjamin Franklin, we actually survive without you. We live, we breathe, we dream, we do our work, we earn our pay, sometimes we even have our little failures, and then we pull ourselves together all without benefit of your fabulous electric lips! And let me tell you something else, buster. I can walk into that kitchen anytime I want, and replace those fabulous lips of yours with a soggy piece of liver!'"

After her tirade, the nurse waits for a smart aleck remark regarding how well he kisses, but there is none. Satisfied with her chastisement, Margaret turns to head back inside. Entering the mess tent, both Chief Surgeon and Head Nurse are instantly uncomfortable when greeted with applause. Hawkeye because he is thoroughly chastised and Margaret because of the eavesdropping. For the next day, the surgeon decides to avoid Margaret.

"Hey, Margaret! I need to apologize," Hawkeye sincerely states running up to her in the compound after Inga leaves. "You were right, and I'm sorry."

Noticing the words as a true apology, Margaret smiles.

"Apology accepted," She answers before heading to her tent. That night, Margaret makes sure to pull her hair back and put on a little make up. Despite her declaration that women can get along without him, Hawkeye may have been right about being jealous of Inga. Both professionally and personally the woman had everything she wants, but the nurse takes comfort in the fact that she and Hawkeye also have a good friendship despite their rocky past. Walking to the mess tent where they will get to watch one of her favorite movies, the nurse happily sits beside B.J. just before the lights go out. After a moment, the nurse asks B.J. where Hawkeye is.

"Post Op," The younger surgeon whispers never turning away from the movie. Nodding, Margaret silently slips out in search of Hawkeye. Finding him at the desk in the corner of Post Op, Margaret goes toward him.

"You okay?" She asks once she gets his attention. When the surgeon answers with a shrug, Margaret tries a different tactic and asks, "'Didn't you know the movie just went on in the Mess Tent?'"

"'Yeah, Casablanca'," Hawkeye answers glumly. Eager to make the movie appealing, the nurse adds, "'With Humphrey Bogart.'"

"'And Ingrid Bergman. I don't think I'm strong enough to hear a Swedish accent for a while'," Hawkeye laments.

"'It was kinda rough for you, wasn't it?'" Margaret asks not seeing him this upset about a woman since Carlye.

"'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world - she had to walk into mine'," He quotes.

Now determined to make him feel better, Margaret gently demands, "'Come on. See the movie.'"

"'Nah, I'm all right'," Hawkeye dismisses wishing to wallow.

"'I'll buy you popcorn'," Margaret states knowing the food to be his weakness as it is the only edible food they get in camp. Nodding, Hawkeye stands with Margaret. Putting his arms around her shoulders, the surgeon asks, "'You're gonna pull me through this in spite of myself, aren't ya?'"

"'Why not?'" She asks knowing him to do the same for her.

"'You know, Louis,'" Hawkeye quotes, "'this could be the start of a beautiful friendship.'"

Chuckling, Margaret and Hawkeye leave the room and head to the movie. Slipping in from the back, the friends sit next to each other. Despite only seeing the movie once when it comes out, the nurse allows Hawkeye to whisper stupid comments to her as they share a bag of popcorn. She thinks of the outing almost like a date, except both parties are in relationship slumps and there is too much left unsaid.

To her surprise, Margaret finds herself staring at Jack Scully who comes into camp a few days after her and Hawkeye's movie night. When Scully walks into the mess tent to greet her, the nurse's eyes light up. Hawkeye simply decides to change the topic. The thought of Margaret being with anyone after Donald thoroughly upsets him, and not because of their movie night. She deserves someone better than a man like Scully, or Donald, or even him. As Margaret and Jack stare dreamily at each other, Hawkeye is happy as his sarcastic comments go unnoticed by the two despite the nausea that rises up in Hawkeye's stomach. While Margaret and Scully spend some quality time together, any plan to date is quickly squashed when Scully dismisses her rank as honorary. Storming out of her tent, Margaret goes in search of booze from the Officer's Club. In no way will Scully follow her there. Opening the door, Margaret calls for a beer and sits next to Hawkeye who is playing a game of Scrabble at the bar.

"'Margaret'," The surgeon teases, "'You're alone!'"

"'Brilliant observation, Sherlock'," The nurse deadpans. As Igor hands her a beer, the nurse only half hears Hawkeye's plea for her to play Scrabble with him. "'No, I've played enough games for one day, thank you.'"

Intrigued, Hawkeye asks what happens between her and Scully. Immediately, Margaret goes on about how Scully dismisses her rank and its importance to her.

"'Margaret, that's just Scully. You knew all that when you met him'," Hawkeye points out causing Margaret to remark, "'A typical man.'"

"'Don't lump us all together'," The surgeon defends remembering his friend's chastising words from almost a week ago. "'Scully and I are completely different guys, and you and I didn't get along so hot.'"

"'That's exactly my point'," Margaret states. "'You different men are all alike.'"

Suddenly, Hawkeye is not in the mood to play Scrabble anymore. When he is lumped into a list with Jack, Frank, and Donald, Hawkeye remarks, "'Well, excuse us all for not being perfect!'"

Taking a drink of her beer, Margaret sets the bottle down exclaiming, "'Perfect? None of you even tried!'"

"'Margaret, it's not that easy to become something someone else wants you to be. Believe me! I've spent a lifetime not doing it. I couldn't do it in med school for the woman I loved, and I won't do it now for an army I hate. You can't order people to your own specifications. You've got to take them as is.'"

"'People can change when they mean enough to each other'," Margaret demands.

"Look, why can't you just chalk this up to experience and forget about Scully?'" Hawkeye proposes. Right in his ear, the nurse exclaims, "'Because I like him you dummy!'"

As soon as she says the words, Margaret tells Hawkeye to take her beer before she runs out to find Klinger. Deciding she will change for Scully, Margaret asks Klinger to alter a dress for her so she can impress the now Private. However, her plan quickly unravels as Scully starts talking to her as if she is a disrespected housewife. Kicking him out of her tent again, Margaret strips out of her dress and dresses in her army clothes. She decides to give the dress back to Klinger in the morning. It is too lovely to give back so soon. Just like earlier in the day, the nurse makes her way to the officer's club where Hawkeye is still playing Scrabble albeit in his robe. When she orders two beers, Hawkeye remarks, "'Thanks, but I'm having Scotch.'"

"'They're both for me'," Margaret announces as she heads to a table. When Hawkeye philosophizes over beer, Margaret tells him to stop talking. Realizing she is genuinely upset, the surgeon grabs her beers and puts them on the table for her.

"'Put your torch out in that'," He tells her. Taking one of the bottles, Margaret defends, "'I don't have a torch, Pal. I've got smoldering embers. I'd have a bonfire if I didn't keep running into guys who want to get their hands warm.'"

"'Well, one day you'll find Mr. Right'," Hawkeye reassures secretly hoping it will be him. Dismissing his sentiment, Margaret states, "'I have the only heart in Korea with a revolving door."

She goes on to say that she will make sure they meet her minimum standards.

"'Now what are they?'" Hawkeye inquires wondering if he meets them. Instead, he ends up being part of them. Thinking over her requirements, the surgeon answers, "'Maybe you and I are just too choosy. We're both waiting for a custom fit in an off the rack world.'"

"'Sounds like a long wait'," Margaret states. Standing up, Hawkeye tells Margaret that they can play a game of Scrabble while they wait. Going back to the table with the game board, Hawkeye asks, "'Have you ever played Double Solitaire Scrabble?'"

"'Double Solitaire?'" Margaret questions as she puts her bottle on a nearby chair. Her friend explains the rules adding, "'And if you need any extra letters like Y for Sympathy? You can borrow one of mine.'"

"'How many points do I get if I find L-O-V-E?'" Margaret teases.

"'You win the game'," Hawkeye states before they both start playing.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 1 of the episode "Yessir, That's Our Baby".

One morning, B.J. wakes up to a baby crying and it takes Charles to find the bundle left at their doorstep. What does not take long is for the camp to find out about their tiniest and newest member. The Swamp mates bring the baby to the Mess Tent and Margaret immediately gravitates toward her.

"'Be careful with her Pierce. She's not a bag of laundry'," Margaret remarks as she sits next to Hawkeye on the mess tent bench as he holds the rather content baby. Still cradling her, Hawkeye replies that he knows what he is doing and adds, "'She loves me. Look at that smile.'"

To say the entire camp is enamored is an understatement. Margaret simply marvels at both the baby and the man holding her. Trying not to take over and cause suspicion, Margaret keeps her mouth shut over things like a physical until necessary. Once she has hold of the baby after finding out Klinger steals her pajama shirts for baby clothes, Margaret easily takes to rocking her and walking around the exam room telling explaining that she is "Auntie Margaret".

"'Why Auntie Margaret'," Hawkeye teases, "'I had no idea you were so maternal. I could just see you with a house full of tiny little Majorettes.'"

Trying to keep her voice from breaking, Margaret turns to Colonel Potter and asks if he knows where the baby is from or who her family is. With no information about the baby, Klinger proposes they name her. Colonel Potter quickly vetoes Klinger's choice and asks where they baby will sleep. Margaret immediately volunteers before lying the baby down on the exam table to change her and clothe her. Following Margaret back to her tent, Hawkeye asks why the baby cannot stay with him in The Swamp. Gesturing to her tent, the nurse answers, "'Look around!"'

Going to a cleared out trunk and opening the lid, Margaret continues, "'This place is warm. It's pleasant. It's a home. That gutter you're in is a festival of old sneakers, dirty laundry, and yesterday's booze.'"

He watches the nurse place the baby in the makeshift crib and states, "'That's what makes it perfect. She can't mess it up.'"

Just as Margaret makes sure the baby is comfy, Father Mulcahey comes inside the tent and announces, "'Well, I understand the stork dropped off a package while I was gone.'"

"'Good morning, Padre'," Colonel Potter greets, "'This little lady seems to be alone in the world. Do you think the good sisters at the orphanage can help out?'"

"'I'm sure they can, Colonel. The first rule of orphanages and Irish families is, "There's always room for one more."'" The Father happily announces before he takes a good look at the child.

"'Isn't she lovely?'" Margaret beams as she glances up at Hawkeye. The Colonel looks over at his Chief Surgeon and Head Nurse who seem awfully comfortable standing together before turning to The Father who distractedly answers, "'Oh, yes. Yes, quite nice.'"

"'Nice?'" Hawkeye asks in disbelief, "'She's gorgeous. Doesn't she deserve at least a "Wow" or a "Holy smoke"? Where's the oohs and ahhs?'"

Looking at Colonel Potter, the Father asks if the child is mixed race.

''All we know is that there was one of each. Is that mixed enough?'" Hawkeye asks as Margaret adds, "'Her father's an American, and her mother's Korean.'"

"'I was afraid of that'," Father Mulcahey states. After Hawkeye asks why that is a problem, the priest explains how the baby will ultimately by shunned if not killed.

"'Even in the orphanage, the other Korean children will be very cruel to her. And when she grows up, she'll be ostracized by every segment of Korean society. This child has no future here, none at all. She'll end up a virtual slave... or worse'," The Father explains. When Hawkeye asks if there is anyone who can take the baby, Father Mulcahey states, "'Her only hope - and that's slim at best - would be sanctuary in one of the old Catholic missions.'"

"'We'll take it. Slim is better than none'," Hawkeye announces as Margaret comes up behind him. The Father mentally notes that the pair makes a nice, solid couple, but dismisses the thought as Margaret asks, "'What do we do? Where are these places?'"

"'Well, there's one not too far off. Armies, for centuries, have fought around it, left it untouched. The monks will keep her cloistered, educate her, and in fifteen or twenty years, working with their other monasteries abroad, perhaps they can get her out of Korea.'"

Finally speaking, Colonel Potter notes, "'With all due respect, Father, that doesn't sound like much of a life.'"

Gloomily, Father Mulcahey answers, "'It isn't. But it's the best we can do.'"

"'No it's not'," Hawkeye protests. "'She's half American. We'll send her to America and get her a room at The Statue of Liberty.'"

The Father nods knowing nothing can stop a determined Hawkeye and wishes him luck before leaving the tent. Turning toward Colonel Potter, Hawkeye asks how he can start. Nodding the Colonel answers, "First, we need to go through the proper channels. I'll start the paperwork if you want to follow me to my office."

Nodding Hawkeye gives a fond smile to the baby and says, "Don't worry. We'll help you."

He runs his finger along her cheek before turning to Margaret.

"Wish me luck," Hawkeye remarks before he follows Colonel Potter to his office. Alone, Margaret immediately transitions into being a mother once again. Holding the baby, Margaret bounces her and coos before remembering the paperwork on her desk. Putting the baby back in her crib, the nurse gets to work. A knock on her door causes her to look up and call out that the door is open. She sees Klinger come in with his makeshift bottle made out of a surgical glove and smiles.

"You already have her on a feeding schedule?" The nurse teases. Shaking his head, Klinger answers, "I just figured she's hungry. Do you mind if I take her out for a stroll? Women can't resist guys with babies."

With a small laugh, Margaret gives her permission. Deciding to walk with Klinger as he heads toward the nurse's tent, Margaret soon veers off to Colonel Potter's office.

"Sir," She states without preamble, "I want to help Captain Pierce."

"That's a nice sentiment, Major, but I'm afraid the two of you won't be as effective. I've just sent someone to get B.J. so we can brief him," Colonel Potter states. Margaret almost forms a rebuttal when B.J. announces, "You wanted to see me?"

Motioning for the surgeon to sit down, Colonel Potter looks back to Margaret and apologizes.

Turning in his chair, Hawkeye adds, "Besides, the baby is staying with you, Margaret."

She makes a face at him as he answers, "I'm serious. You're already great with her. We need you here."

Crossing her arms, Margaret consents to the plan, but not without looking at Hawkeye and asking him to be careful.

"I'll come back with coffee and donuts for both of us," He answers with a slight smirk. B.J. and the Colonel simply glance at each other wondering what they miss before Hawkeye turns back around and explains the plan.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of "Yessir, That's Our Baby".

When B.J. and Hawkeye leave the next morning, they almost take the baby with them. Quickly, the Colonel, Margaret, and Charles protest. While the men are gone, the baby is continually passed around the camp to eager onlookers. After demonstrating a diaper changing technique, Klinger happily holds the baby. Eyes watering a little, Margaret tells the man that he will make a wonderful father. Klinger thanks the nurse, but states that he wants a son after he is out of the army. While he describes what he and his future son will do, Margaret tries her best to keep from crying knowing she will never get that with her own son.

Later in the day when B.J. and Hawkeye return, Margaret sees them as she takes a walk with the baby. She waves to the men and Hawkeye is struck by how at ease she looks holding the baby girl in her arms. They men smile at her as she walks up to them and hugs them. The men each accept a hug, but not without doting on the baby in her arms. Handing her off to B.J., Margaret follows in step with them as she asks, "How did the meeting go?"

"Abismal," Hawkeye remarks while B.J. gives more detail of the events adding, "All I know is I want to get out of these clothes."

"I second that!" Hawkeye replies as they enter the Swamp. Looking down at the baby, B.J. remarks, "Look at that. She fell asleep in my arms."

Shaking her head, the nurse replies, "She really doesn't need to. She already hates sleeping at night."

"We can always take her for you, Margaret," Charles pipes up from his bunk.

"Willing to play Uncle are we Charles?" Hawkeye teases as he takes his tie off. Rolling his eyes, Charles simply gets up and asks to hold the baby. Just as she is snoring, the PA sounds announcing choppers. Immediately the baby starts crying and Margaret takes her instantly. Finding Klinger in the chaos of the camp, Margaret asks him to take her. Dutifully taking the baby from the Major, the man goes off to calm her down. After surgery, Colonel Potter has the staff and the Father meet in the Clerk's office where Klinger has a cradle made out of half an oil drum to keep the baby asleep. Surrounding the sleeping baby, Hawkeye remarks, "'Klinger, my compliments to Zale on making that cradle.'"

The topic soon shifts from the baby's needs to her placement. As the conversation gets heated, the staff has to calm Potter down so he will not flip the improvised cradle. As the Colonel slows his rocking, Margaret remarks, "'I don't blame you for getting angry. I wish I'd been there.'"

Soon, it is settled. The next day, Colonel Potter will go with Hawkeye to speak to the Korean government. Dismissing them all to bed, Colonel Potter is the first to leave. Margaret gingerly picks up the sleeping baby and takes her to her tent. She knows taking care of the baby is selfish on her part, but just holding the girl makes her feel a little less upset about her son and her pregnancy scare. Noticing the baby wakes up when she turns on her tent light, Margaret quickly goes to quiet her. Rocking the tiniest member of the unit, Margaret speaks gently, "I had a baby like you once. His name was Michael and he was my whole life just like you were your mother's. I promise. She just couldn't do all she could for you. If I could, I'd take you home with me."

A knock on her door causes the woman to stop talking.

"Come in," She calls out. Seeing Hawkeye walk inside, the woman immediately relaxes.

"You okay keeping her here tonight?" The surgeon asks cautiously aware of the lighter shift in Margaret's demeanor since the baby comes into camp.

"Fine," Margaret stresses knowing how much everyone is taken with the baby. "Besides, it'll be less people to wake up."

Not arguing with her logic, Hawkeye states, "Okay, but if you need any help, there's a whole camp willing to take her off your hands for you."

The blonde merely laughs before shooing him off so she can get ready for bed. After rocking the baby, Margaret makes sure the youngest member is fully asleep before putting her in her makeshift crib. Waking up the next morning, Margaret remembers the infant and gets up to check on her. Finding she is gone, the nurse lets out a scream that makes her remember Michael. Stumbling out of her tent half awake, Margaret notices a few of the nurses coming to see if she is okay.

"Have you seen the baby?" She questions. Nurse Able nods answering, "She's with Colonel Potter now. A few of us heard her crying this morning, so Hawkeye offered to check on her."

Numbly, Margaret walks toward the Swamp and her temper starts to soar. Glaring at Hawkeye after she storms into the tent, Margaret begins to yell at him for taking the baby from her without her knowledge. Wondering where her anger is even coming from, Hawkeye remarks, "I didn't want to wake you. I left a note on your desk."

Scoffing, Margaret exclaims, "A note! Why would you leave me notes? You of all people!"

"Sorry, Margaret. I'll just wake you up with a kiss next time," Hawkeye sarcastically replies. After a second he realizes the woman's anger is genuine and asks, "Margaret, what's wrong?"

Instead of an answer, he merely sees Margaret's expression turn to one of devastation as a tear rolls down her cheek. Cautiously, the surgeon walks toward the blonde and hugs her too him. After she breaks the hug, Hawkeye whispers, "Go get some rest."

Nodding mutely, Margaret walks off causing Hawkeye to look over at B.J. who shrugs. After a moment, Hawkeye asks, "Should I go talk to her?"

Shaking his head, B.J. requests, "Do you mind if I talk to her? You have to be at that office soon anyway."

Noting Hawkeye's confusion, B.J. silently asks permission unable to articulate a parent's anguish, especially because he is fairly certain that Margaret has no children. Waiting about half an hour, B.J. finally makes his way over to the Head Nurse's tent and knocks.

"Go away!" Margaret calls out as she stands up to check her face for tear stains.

"Margaret, it's me," B.J. explains. Wiping her face, Margaret lets B.J. inside.

"What happened back there?" He asks. "You acted like it was your child who was taken away."

"He was," Margaret mumbles to herself before brushing off, "It was nothing."

B.J. stands in the tent unconvinced. Knowing she needs to tell someone, Margaret motions for her friend to sit down. Running a hand through her hair, Margaret states, "I had a son."

"Congratulations," The young doctor praises. Shaking her head, Margaret emphasizes, "I had a son. He died over a year ago. He would have been two last week, and I guess that baby just healed me for a moment."

"Margaret!" B.J. sighs. He feels horrible for her especially since he knows it is every parent's worst fear. After another moment, B.J. stares in shock when Margaret admits more to herself than anyone, "He had Hawkeye's eyes."

"Hawk?" The surgeon chokes out figuring the earlier conversation in the Swamp makes a little more sense now, but not by much. Nodding, Margaret continues, "It's just, when she was gone, I had this instant fear and reacted like I did when my son died."

B.J. merely stays quiet knowing a simple "sorry" will not help, nor will reassurance. Instead, the man nods and heads to the door.

"Beej?" Margaret quietly calls before the surgeon leaves the tent. "Don't tell Hawk. He never knew about Mi- my son."

"I won't say anything," B.J. promises.

After a fruitless talk that day, Hawkeye and Colonel Potter update the staff who go to Colonel Potter's tent. When they explain the situation to Father Mulcahey, the priest states, "'I hate to say I told you so, but I told you so. Perhaps you'd like to reconsider my suggestion that we leave the child at the monastery?'"

Colonel Potter decides to leave the decision up the Hawkeye who is the main champion for the cause. Decidedly, Hawkeye states that he wants to talk to Tokyo. Giving his permission, Hawkeye and Charles head out to Tokyo a couple days later. With no luck in Tokyo, Hawkeye admits they need to give the baby the slim chance and agree to leave her at the monastery. Telling Margaret his decision that night, the nurse asks as she rocks the baby, "Are you sure?"

"What am I going to do? Adopt her?" He questions wishing the option is possible. For once he curses his bachelorhood. Margaret looks down at the baby who is still awake before looking at Hawkeye who sits on her cot.

"Hawk," She begins wanting to tell him desperately about Michael. However, having to lose this baby does not bode well for a conversation about their son. Instead she states, "Do what you think is right."

With a wan smile, Hawkeye thanks her before standing up and kissing the baby good night. He begins to kiss Margaret on the cheek, but quickly stops himself knowing that will lead to an awkwardness he does not want to face.

"Night, Margaret," He states before leaving her tent.

She finds it odd a couple days later, passing the baby off to Hawkeye once he is settled in the jeep. A memory of when Michael is given to her to hold and she finally decides on a name flashes through her mind. Secretly, Margaret regrets not telling Hawkeye about their son, but knows there is no reason to now. Why destroy a man's- Hawkeye's- life? This child brings the whole camp together, and heals Margaret just a little. Gently, she brushes the baby's hair and stands back.

As soon as the jeep leaves camp, Colonel Potter tells the camp to disperse before heading off to his tent. Margaret simply stands still staring at the 4077 sign. With tears in her eyes, Margaret heads back to her tent. However, seeing the crib and few items that the baby girl amasses, the nurse instantly breaks down. Still awake when the jeep comes back, Margaret goes off to greet the men. Concern etched on their faces, B.J. finally asks why she is awake. Shaking her head, the nurse answers, "Couldn't sleep. How was she?"

Shrugging, Hawkeye answers, "Asleep. We rang the bell and left."

Charles and Father Mulcahey quickly say their good byes before heading to their tents leaving Margaret standing with her closest camp friends. The men both notice Margaret's devastated expression and B.J. quickly reassures, "She'll be fine."

Giving the younger surgeon a small smile, Margaret whispers, "I know."

B.J. nods before heading to bed. As soon as the man leaves, Hawkeye asks if he and Margaret can talk in her tent. Nodding, Margaret leads the way. Entering the tent, Hawkeye is instantly struck by the lack of the baby's items.

"I put them away," Margaret remarks seeing where Hawkeye's gaze lands. "It's all in the trunk, though."

"Good," The surgeon answers with a hollow tone. After a moment, he states, "I think she made me want to settle down."

"The army is not the place, believe me," Margaret jokes lamely. With a small laugh, Hawkeye states, "Oh, I know. Once I get home. Have a wife, kids? It sounds nice."

Smiling, Margaret answers wistfully, "It is."

Too tired to catch his friend's expression, Hawkeye yawns, "I should get back."

Nodding, Margaret watches her friend head to the door before quickly asking, "Will you stay here?"

Shocked, Hawkeye almost protests, but can see the longing in his friend's eyes. He can tell she needs some sort of comfort, and so does he. Agreeing, Hawkeye soon finds himself snuggled next to Margaret on her cot. Just as he is falling asleep, he hears an equally tired Margaret whisper, "Thank you, Ben."


	25. Chapter 25

Waking up the next morning, Margaret slowly opens her eyes to find Hawkeye snoring peacefully. Cursing her bladder, the nurse tries her best not to wake him as she leaves the cot, however sleeping toward the wall keeps her from doing so. When her friend does wake up, Margaret whispers an apology before telling him to go back to sleep. Coming back from the latrine, Margaret takes in the early morning stillness. She never tires of hearing nothing, especially during the war. Finally going back to her tent, the nurse enters to find Hawkeye awake.

"Morning," She states causing him to turn toward her from his position on the cot.

"Morning," He answers with a smirk. After a moment she asks, "What did you want to tell me last night?"

Noticing his confused expression, Margaret explains, "Last night you told me you wanted to talk. What was it about?"

With a yawn, Hawkeye replies, "Oh, just what I was feeling when I put the baby in the box last night. It doesn't matter now."

Margaret nods, but gives him a look of reassurance and compassion. Standing from the cot, Hawkeye gives her a small smile before heading toward the door. As he begins to leave, Margaret thanks him.

"Anytime," He teases noticing a hauted look on her face for the second or third time that week. As the camp moves on from the baby, Hawkeye is keenly aware of a secret Margaret keeps from him. However, as much as he wants to, he knows he will never pry. He only hopes that Margaret will tell him before the war is over. What the surgeon does instead is try to keep a light atmosphere between them. As they both leave the floor after dancing the Lindy a week later, Hawkeye asks if he can buy her a beer. Smiling, the nurse agrees before the pair sits together and watches the other couples.

"Did we ever dance together that night?" Hawkeye wonders aloud knowing he breaks the vow he secretly makes. Eyes widening, Margaret hisses the man's name.

"No, really. Did we?" He questions seriously. Surprised, Margaret asks, "You don't remember?"

With a smile, Hawkeye admits, "I wasn't exactly sober that night."

"Neither was I," Margaret remarks as she takes a drink of her beer. Setting the bottle down, the nurse states, "At least I know you didn't take advantage of me."

Nearly spitting his drink out, Hawkeye remarks, "Are you saying you took advantage of me?"

Shrugging, Margaret answers, "All I remember is barely making it inside your hotel room. The rest is a little hazy after that."

"But we did dance?" The surgeon clarifies. Nodding, Margaret answers, "We danced."

As the jukebox plays in the corner, Hawkeye notices his friend's face go soft as the familiar voices of The Andrews Sisters fills the room. Softly he asks her what is wrong. Swallowing, Margaret states, "This is the song we danced to."

"We danced to Near You by The Andrew's Sisters?" He questions barely remembering the song. Margaret nods trying to understand what is going through her friend's mind when he smiles at her.

"Margaret. May I have this dance?" Hawkeye asks holding out his hand. Margaret simply rolls her eyes before giving him her hand. As they dance, Hawkeye whispers, "It's kind of like Deja Vu. This."

"Yeah," She answers softly. "But this time no one is going to anyone's room."

"Naturally. We're not drunk enough," Hawkeye answers as he draws Margaret a little closer. Just as the song ends, an impromptu OR session calls the entire camp back to real life.

Early the next morning once the surgeries end, Hawkeye sits across from Margaret and tops off her coffee. She nods her thanks before listening to the Colonel. A night turned into an impromptu OR session is not the most ideal way to start the day, and the officers and other surgeons are extremely happy to get some rest. Waking up hours later, Margaret makes sure to ask Colonel Potter for a three day pass as a gift to herself. With her thirty second birthday coming up as well as a terrible year, she decides she deserves a small vacation. However, when that day comes, all she is met with is disappointment. Unable to make her flight, the nurse spends her birthday with Klinger and a broken jeep. Finding out it is Margaret's birthday, Klinger tries to make her happy with a bran muffin he confiscates from the kitchen and match. Margaret is angry at first, but soon appreciates the effort. No one ever really celebrates her birthday, so a kind gesture goes a long way for her. After hitching a ride back to camp the next morning, the nurse and the company clerk enter the mess tent where most of the camp is eating breakfast. Sitting down next to Potter and across from B.J. and Hawkeye, the men ask Margaret about her trip. Explaining that she never makes it to the plane and they have to get a ride back to camp, the nurse and Klinger hear about the calf that B.J. and Hawkeye deliver.

"'I'm a dead man'," Klinger remarks thinking about the fifty dollars he has to give to the winner of the betting pool. Thinking he is safe when Hawkeye and B.J. give him an estimate for the calf's arrival, he is upset to find that the eavesdropping table next to them gives him a clear answer. With a sigh, the company clerk takes out the betting list from his pocket and is surprised to announce the winner is Margaret Houlihan. Nearly spitting out her coffee from laughing, Margaret manages to choke it down before telling Klinger he can keep his fifty dollars. Thanking her because all he has is ten dollars, the man is shocked when Margaret changes her mind. Telling him she will take his ten, the nurse remarks that she has a gift she wants to buy. Knowing it is most likely for her, Klinger gives her the money.

Leaving with her ten dollars after breakfast, Margaret is unaware of anyone behind her as she tries to figure out what to buy herself.

"Happy Birthday," Hawkeye states when no one is looking causing the nurse to jump.

"How?" Margaret begins. Shrugging, the surgeon admits to looking at her file. Rolling her eyes, Margaret remarks, "Of course you did."

"Anyway, what are you going to get?" Hawkeye asks nodding toward the money in her hands. With a smirk, the nurse replies, "That's for me to know."

"Spoil sport," The surgeon teases before catching up to B.J. who is about to tell the farmer and his cows good bye. However, any good feelings are quickly gone when Hawkeye declares two weeks later that he is going to move out of his tent. Neither his bunk mates nor the rest of the camp has a problem with the surgeon's decision as long as the camp gets a little peace. Despite the peace of the camp, none of the men in the Swamp are at peace. B.J. must deal with Charles' classical music on full blast, Charles has to listen to B.J. read his wife's letters for the millionth time, and Hawkeye realizes he does not like being alone. Saying something to Margaret at lunch while B.J. is getting his portrait taken and Charles is off who knows where, Margaret teases, "I thought you wanted to be alone?"

Shaking his head, the surgeon replies, "It's awful, Margaret! Sure, it was great the first hour or so, but then I was just bored out of my mind! Have you ever had to play cards alone?"

"I hear there's a game for that," Margaret deadpans. "Solitaire."

Seeing the glum look on her friend's face, the nurse asks, "Why don't you just move back in?"

"And give B.J. and Charles the satisfaction? Oh, no!" Hawkeye states to prideful to admit defeat. After Hawkeye leaves, Margaret soon finds herself sitting with Father Mulcahey and Klinger who comment on how unhappy B.J. and Hawkeye are. Knowing about Hawkeye, Margaret tells her own story about Charles.

"We need to find a way to get them to like each other again," Klinger remarks. Nodding, Father Mulcahey adds, "If only we could think of a good way to do that."

All three lost in thought when Colonel Potter comes by to ask their thoughts about his painting, they pay the man little attention, but instead meets up near Klinger's office to devise a plan to get the men to talk to each other again. Each picking a surgeon, Margaret soon finds herself entering Hawkeye's private hut. When his door opens, Hawkeye is surprised to find Margaret come inside and quickly acts as if he is deeply engrossed in his book and enjoying his time alone.

"'Just put that aside, Pierce'," Margaret states. "'I'm here to express my disappointment.'"

Confused, Hawkeye asks what she is referring to. Explaining how Hawkeye can leave B.J. worried about his daughter and not even be there to reassure him, Margaret watches Hawkeye fall for the story. Secretly pleased with herself, Margaret keeps on with the story and B.J.'s feelings.

"'Well, I'm gonna talk to Beej'," Hawkeye starts as he heads toward the door. Stopping him, Margaret tells him that B.J. will probably not accept his friend's help out of pride. At a loss, Hawkeye asks what he can do to help his friend. Taking hold of his arms, Margaret looks him in the eye and replies, "'Just be there.'"

Hawkeye meets his friend's gaze and simply nods.

"Yeah, you're right," He admits before turning away from her and the door and complaining, "I should have been there, you know? Some friend I am, not even caring about B.J.'s problems. Just my stupid socks! If I'd have known, I would have let him keep them."

"It's not your fault," Margaret tells him. "He didn't tell you."

Both are silent until Hawkeye states, "I'm going back to camp. Care to join me?"

Margaret smirks answering, "I could do with a walk. Do you need me to help you carry anything?"

"Take my helmet and jacket?" He asks. Nodding, the pair heads back to camp talking the whole way. Entering camp, Margaret places Hawkeye's helmet back on his head and wishes him luck.


	26. Chapter 26

A couple days after Hawkeye moves back into The Swamp, wounded come in the middle of the night. Thankfully, there are not enough to have all surgeons on duty. Knowing if all three surgeons in The Swamp operate on at least two patients, they can get back to bed quicker. Finally asleep after hours in the OR and Post Op, Charles and B.J. both yell at Hawkeye to quit sneezing. He continues well into the next day and during a staff meeting. He keeps insisting he is well, but no one will believe him. Margaret who has been back and forth trying to offer him Colonel Potter's handkerchief, finally stands up and checks his forehead. Shaking her head, Margaret announces, "'He doesn't have a fever.'"

However, being in a room full of medical personel elicits a debate that Hawkeye is dumbfounded by. He understands they are worried about his health, but he is fine. However, as the sneezing continues, Hawkeye is declared unfit for surgery and kept away from the soldiers. Convinced it is something in his tent, Hawkeye goes through everything trying to find the cause. After watching his friend search for over ten minutes, B.J. proposes he have an allergy test done. Agreeing, Hawkeye lets himself be poked by needles before being told to recover in his tent. Starting to itch a couple hours later, Hawkeye makes his way to Colonel Potter's office where her declares he feels like he will die. Led to a chair, Hawkeye continues to scratch at his legs as Potter quarantines him to the VIP tent. Leaving with B.J. and Margaret, Hawkeye asks, "Are you sure I'm not going to die? For all I know I picked up the rarest form of Korean Poison Ivy," Hawkeye half jokes as he scratches at his hands. Both B.J. and Margaret reassure him that he is fine as they walk through the compound. Heading toward the VIP tent, Margaret states, "I'll settle him in. Do you mind grabbing his things?"

"Can do! Hawkeye do you want your stuffed dog?" B.J. teases knowing his friend does not like to be fussed over. Rolling his eyes, Hawkeye poorly jokes, "Never get your dog stuffed!"

"Come on, let's get you to bed," Margaret states leading the man away. Entering the VIP tent, Margaret helps her friend to bed. Brushing his hair away once he is settled, Margaret is quick to note there is no fever. Fluffing his pillow, the nurse asks if there is anything she can get for him.

"This whole thing to be over?" He jokes before asking for some calamine or anything to help his itch. Nodding, Margaret answers, "I'll get it as soon as B.J. comes back."

Less than ten minutes later, B.J. comes into the tent with pajamas, a couple books, and some stationary before asking for his robe. Refusing, Hawkeye states, "This stays with me."

Rolling her eyes at his childishness, Margaret states, "You act like we're taking away a precious blanket. We need to wash it. At least to make sure that it's not the problem."

"Fine," Hawkeye grumbles. "But I want it back as soon as it's dry."

Nodding, Margaret and B.J. leave the tent and let their friend change and rest. With the robe over her arm, Margaret announces she will go to the laundry. Nodding, B.J. announces he has rounds for the afternoon. They are both about to go their seperate ways when Klinger comes by to tell them that Colonel Potter calls in Sydney Freeman to examine Hawkeye. Eyes wide, the nurse asks, "Does he think it's mental?"

Shrugging, Klinger answers, "We've checked everything else."

"When do they expect him in?" B.J. questions.

"Hopefully tonight," Klinger answers before being called by Charles.

Entering Hawkeye's tent at dinner, Margaret sets a tray down beside his bed. Hawkeye eyes the tray warily before thanking his friend.

"You're welcome," She answers. "How are you feeling?"

Sighing, Hawkeye announces, "Lousy and still itching."

The glare Margaret receives tells her she and B.J. never need to take his robe.

"We need to take every precaution," Margaret states softly. Putting his head against the pillow, Hawkeye states, "I know. I'm just not used to being fussed over."

Sitting beside his bed in a chair, the nurse answers, "Get used to it. At least until you're well. There are a lot of people here who want you better."

Sneezing loudly, Hawkeye sighs, frustrated.

"Trust me, if I could get better, I would."

Smiling at her friend, Margaret states, "I'm going to get your robe. Eat."

"Yes, dear," Hawkeye teases as he watches the blonde leave. Halfway through his food, Hawkeye looks up when the door opens. Seeing Colonel Potter, Hawkeye sets the tray aside and greets him.

"Don't sound too happy, Pierce. I made a call to Sydney."

"Sydney!" Hawkeye questions. "Don't get me wrong, I love the guy, but not enough to get my head examined."

Shaking his head, Potter remarks that they have tried everything else. Just as Hawkeye is about to complain again, Margaret comes in with his robe and a folder. A genuine smile breaks across the surgeon's face as he grabs for his robe and kisses it.

Rolling her eyes, Margaret tells him to stop being dramatic and to simply put the item on.

"Yes, ma'am," Hawkeye flirts before standing up and putting on his favorite accessory. Pointing to the tray, the nurse asks softly, "Are you finished?"

"Yeah, but tell the chef I want lobster next time."

"I'll see what I can do," Margaret announces before taking the tray. Feeling as if he is intruding, Potter announces, "I'll take the tray. You sit with him."

"Thanks, Colonel," The nurse states before sitting down beside her friend. Alone, Hawkeye nods to the file that Margaret still holds asking if it is for Sydney.

"It is. I figured he'd need it," She answers. After a moment she asks, "Do you want to play twenty questions to pass the time?"

"Sure, not much else to do," Hawkeye remarks. The pair go through a myriad of topics until Hawkeye asks about her time in Australia.

"It was winter when I got there. The group I was with was about to start Christmas in July," Margaret begins deciding to tell him about her time via a story. Noticing his confused look, Margaret states, "Seasons are reversed there. Anyway, I was working with an experimental MASH unit like I told you. I got the worst case of Bronchitis that winter and dealt with teasing for three weeks until a new nurse came in."

As she continues the story, Margaret is constantly interrupted by Hawkeye's sneezing. Standing up, Margaret tells Hawkeye she will be back. Soon back with allergy medicine, Margaret puts the pill in Hawkeye's hand followed by a glass of water.

"Swallow and drink," She demands to which Hawkeye complies. Sitting down beside him again, Margaret asks about his residency.

"Well, while you went around the world, I stayed a few towns away in Portland to finish my residency. That's where I met Carlye," Hawkeye states between sneezes. Margaret nods adding, "You really liked her didn't you?"

"Not as much as I like you," Hawkeye confesses before he is aware of what he says. Both too shocked to speak, they are quiet for a good few minutes until Sydney comes in and breaks the silence.

"'I'll leave you two alone'," Margaret states once greetings are made. Patting Hawkeye's arm, the nurse tells him, "'I'll stop by later to see how you are.'"

He groans in response as Margaret tells the psychiatrist that she gives Hawkeye a Benadryl in case he seems tired.

"'Thank you. Someday you'll make a healthy man very happy'," Sydney tells her and quickly notices the woman glances back at Hawkeye before leaving. Left with his friend, Hawkeye finally opens up about a childhood trauma that Sydney miraculously taps into. Then, he finds he is not sneezing anymore. Confident that his patient is better, Sydney tells Hawkeye he will tell the Colonel. Left alone again, the surgeon happily takes the blanket off and starts to check his face in the mirror. He looks tired, but refreshed. Hearing the door open, the surgeon turns around to see Margaret smiling at him.

"If this were under any other circumstances, I'd take that smile to mean something else. I take it, Sydney told you I'm cured?" Hawkeye asks. In disbelief, Margaret replies, "He did! I can't believe it! What did he do?"

"Talked to me," The man states. Rolling her eyes, Margaret announces, "I did that."

"But not about a childhood trauma," Hawkeye states before smiling again and exclaiming, "I'm cured!"

"I can see that," Margaret states. Her face softens a little as she tells him, "I'm glad. I wouldn't want my best friend to be bed ridden forever."

The words 'best friend' sting a little, and Hawkeye suddenly remembers that he sort of tells her how he feels. They look each other in the eyes wondering why they cannot communicate their feelings when the door opens again. Sydney invites them to play poker with B.J., The Father, and Colonel Potter, but Margaret quickly bows out.

"I'd love to, but I'm due in Post Op. I just came by to check on the Captain," She states as an excuse. Before leaving, the nurse tells Hawkeye, "I'm glad you're better."

"Me, too," Hawkeye answers before telling Sydney he needs to change and then he will join them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a few chapters left guys! We're almost to GFA!


	27. Chapter 27

We're now in the last couple chapters.

Enjoy!

The next month and a half is relatively normal until Christmas packages start coming into camp. Everyone is filled with anticipation over what he or she will get as well as an abundance of Christmas carols as people become a little more joyful. Once Christmas arrives, the camp puts on their annual Christmas party and the Father brings the children from the orphanage. Despite the festivities, a wounded soldier makes his way to camp. Trying their best to keep him alive, Hawkeye, Margaret, and B.J. simply wait until after midnight not wanting to tell his family that he dies on Christmas. Despite their efforts, the man dies a few minutes before midnight. When Margaret tells them she will get the death certificate, Hawkeye heads over to the clock and changes the time.  
"'Look, he made it. Time of death 12:05 December 26th'," Hawkeye announces. None of them want to face the world, but Hawkeye opens the door. Both the surgeons, the nurse, and the priest look at each other as they here O Holy Night being sung. B.J. closes his eyes and Hawkeye elects to get the death certificate. Deciding to get it himself, Father Mulcahey leaves them. Stumbling out of the OR well after midnight, the surgery team notes that the camp's festivities are winding down. Not much in the mood for a celebration, they head off to their tents.

New Years comes around soon after with another onslaught of wounded. Standing next to Hawkeye during surgery, she hears him somberly hum Auld Lang Syne. Margaret almost comments when the OR door is opened.

"1953!" Klinger calls from the entrance once midnight strikes. Rolling his neck, B.J. asks, "What happened to 1952? It feels like we just glossed over it."

"That was 1951," Hawkeye exclaims with a smirk when he hears Margaret's small chuckle beside him.

"I don't know how your 1952 went, but I remember some memorable moments," Margaret tells her friend. Noting the mischievous glimmer in her eyes, Hawkeye teases, "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were making a pass at me, Nurse."

Any more teasing is banished by the rest of the surgery and Colonel Potter asking what everyone wants from 1953. The consensus is for the war to end. As the winter continues, the camp tries their best to get through knowing this will simply be one more year away from home. Thankfully, the end of April brings warmer weather and a jovial atmosphere. As more and more people spend time outside their tents, Colonel Potter organizes a race against the 8063rd. When Klinger comes around asking about bets, Margaret eagerly accepts the offer.

"'You? How come?'" Hawkeye questions. With a smug smile, the nurse answers, "'I'd do anything to get even with their head nurse. Major Judy Parker, or as every sailor in the fleet affectionately calls her, Parallel Parker.'"

"'There's a wonderfully sordid story behind that, Margaret'," Hawkeye remarks with a smirk. She declines going into the full story and merely states that it involves Parker and a Petty Officer.

"'I'm in for a week's pay,'" The nurse states before asking if B.J. and Hawkeye will join. They decline until Klinger quickly wears them down. To their dismay, the sprinter the camp thinks they are getting is the Olympian's father. Upset they will be out of a week's pay each, the trio soon remember Father Mulcahey runs. After they finally talk the priest into entering in the race, he gives them one condition. If he wins, the orphanage gets a new roof. Agreeing, Margaret, Hawkeye, and B.J. talk with a man who can build the roof. On the day of the race, Margaret gives Nurse Judy a snide comment before heading toward her side of the race. Noticing Margaret brings another woman with her, Hawkeye asks with a smirk, "Who's your friend?"

"This is my best friend Lorraine. We traded her for you," She answers with a smirk of her own. Lorraine tries not to snicker at the banter, and can easily see what Margaret sees in the dark haired man all those years ago. Holding out her hand, Lorraine tells Hawkeye, "Margaret's told me a lot about you."

Seeing the knowing look in her eyes, Hawkeye uneasily answers as he politely shakes the woman's hand, "All good I hope."

Laughing, Margaret answers, "I just told her how big a pain you are."

"Well, I've been known to keep people on their toes," He answers with a smile that can easily send any woman to his arms. Eyeing Margaret, Lorraine gives her a look that asks why she lets him go. Margaret stares at Lorraine with a look that keeps her friend from asking about the relationship, at least until the race is over.

"Margaret, you never told me how handsome he was. Michael really lucked out," Lorraine teases. She notices her friend's expression and quickly apologizes. Shaking her head, Margaret simply answers, "Thanks, Lorraine, but I just don't want anything to get out. You know he would have been four this year? I can only imagine what a handful he would be, knowing now what Hawkeye is like."

"Oh, yeah?" Lorraine teases. "What's he like?"

Giggling, Margaret hisses her friend's name just as Parallel Parker calls Lorraine to the jeep. Hugging her friend, Margaret watches Lorraine leave and the jeep head off. Once the jeep is gone, the head nurse quickly walks to her tent eager to write Lorraine while her words are fresh in her mind. Halfway through the letter, there is a knock on her tent door. Covering her letter with paperwork, Margaret tells the person to come in.

"All right, Margaret! Time to pay up," Hawkeye exclaims as B.J. announces, "We told the Father we'd be right back!"

"You've already given him your money?" The nurse exclaims.

"You haven't?" Hawkeye retorts.

"For your information, I was writing a letter to Lorraine," The nurse answers.

"Ah, the friend who knows everything!" B.J. states causing Margaret to wonder what all Hawkeye tells him. Seeing the shock on the nurse's face, Hawkeye explains, "It's okay. He knows about 1948."

B.J. keeps his mouth shut to stop himself from blabbing that he knows about 1949, too, but remarks instead, "Only the gist. I'm always up for a story, though!"

Both Margaret and Hawkeye laugh uneasily as Hawkeye states, "Not a chance."

The nurse simply tells the men that she will get her money and head to Father Mulcahey's tent in a minute. The men nod and leave, but Hawkeye is stopped by Margaret asking, "What all did you tell him?"

"Just that we spent the night together and how we met. Why? What did you tell him?" The surgeon questions.

"Nothing," Margaret lies. Hawkeye gazes at her quizzically, but keeps his mouth shut. Someday, he hopes she will tell him what her secret is. For now, he has a less than appetizing meal to get to. Just as the door opens again, Margaret calls Hawkeye's name. After he turns, the nurse nervously asks Hawkeye to sit down. Confused, the surgeon complies and sits at Margaret's cot. Swallowing, Margaret gives a couple false starts before stating with a somber eveness, "I didn't tell you everything about our night together."

"Which one?" Hawkeye teases. Noting the serious expression on Margaret's face, the surgeon remarks, "If it's about last year in that hut, I knew during the pregnancy scare that the child could have been mine."

Margaret gives him a shocked look, but shakes her head.

"It's about 1948," The nurse begins, but falters unable to articulate what she wants to say. Instead, she goes to her desk and opens the top drawer. Rifling through the papers, Margaret gingerly picks up a small rectangular paper and hands it to Hawkeye. Taking the paper, Hawkeye glances at it. Looking up, he states lamely, "It's a birth certificate."

Nodding, Margaret explains, "It's your son's."

Suddenly, the man's mouth goes dry as he questions, "Son?"

Margaret nods, "I wanted to tell you."

"When? When he gets out of college? He'll just show up at my door one day? Who's even taking care of him while you're over here?" Hawkeye questions unable to see the torment on Margaret's face. As he continues to rant, Margaret finally grits out, "He's dead!"

Silence permeates the tent until Hawkeye parrots, "He's dead? How?"

Shaking her head, Margaret answers, "It doesn't matter, but now you know why I didn't say anything."

"You still could have written me," Hawkeye whispers. Taking the drawer out of her desk, Margaret hands it over stating, "I did."

Taking the drawer and staring at the letters, the surgeon picks one up and opens it. Swallowing, Hawkeye asks if he can read them. Margaret nods knowing the relationship she carefully creates with Hawkeye is over. Handing him a box to put the letters in, Margaret lets him leave on his own.

"I have to give Father Mulcahey my money," She announces leaving Hawkeye alone.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the second to last chapter! Next up is Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen!

Taking the letters back to his tent, Hawkeye immediately stores all but the first one in his footlocker. Content to be alone, Hawkeye immediately begins to read the first letter. Dated January of 1949, the surgeon is well aware that Margaret will tell him she is pregnant. Just as he suspects, among the simple conversational questions and statements about how he is and how she is and why she never writes before, toward the end of the letter she tells him she is pregnant. Knowing her as he does now, Hawkeye rereads the letter for any sign of hesitancy, and finds it in the rambling.

"Margaret," He whispers to himself both upset with and worried for her. Standing from his cot, Hawkeye puts the first letter back with the others before reading the next one. As he reads the letters dated from January until September over the next few days, Hawkeye realizes that she uses him as some sort of diary to display her worry and excitement. When he gets to the last letter, Hawkeye gingerly opens it and immediately catches the picture that falls out. It is of his son maybe a few weeks old. Reminded of the pictures he sees of himself as a baby, Hawkeye is struck by how much the baby looks like him. That night is when he feels cheated. The picture he holds will be the only chance he ever gets to see his son, and the only person he can properly grieve with is a few strides away and the cause of his new found anguish. Waking up out of a nightmare in the early morning, Hawkeye quietly takes all the letters from his footlocker and knocks on Margaret's tent door. Not caring that he wakes her, the surgeon waits for the door to open before handing the box to her and leaving. In no way will he talk to her now.

Over the next few weeks, Hawkeye and Margaret remain civil, but are in no way as close as before. Despite keeping the picture of his son, Hawkeye cannot shake the feeling of betrayal that hangs over him and soon cannot even look at his friend. In early June, Hawkeye gets a patient whose General father parks a trailer in the camp just to keep tabs on his son and make sure the soldier heals. When the young man dies, Hawkeye is immediately called over. Being the boy's surgeon, Hawkeye makes his way to the General's trailer to deliver the bad news. Knocking on the door, he is soon let inside.

"'Well'," The father asks. Casting a frown, the surgeon answers, "' I'm sorry. He didn't make it.'"

Questioning the man, the General listens to Hawkeye's explanation before asking, "'You have any children?'"

Knowing he cannot claim a son he never knew, the surgeon answers, "'No. I'm not married.'"

Sitting down with the General, Hawkeye listens to stories about his patient as a child. As the general talks about his son, Hawkeye soon comes to understand why Margaret never tells him about theirs. All he has so far is a picture that simply makes him bitter, but hearing the love come from this general makes him break. Hawkeye may never meet his son, but hopes the baby would have been like the soldier he takes care of. After leaving the trailer, Hawkeye immediately goes off to find Margaret. Taking advantage of the fact that she has laryngitis, Hawkeye immediately starts talking as soon as the tent door opens.

"You were right in not telling me about him. I get it now, and I'm sorry," The surgeon admits. He watches a soft smile spread across his friend's face as she immediately starts to cry. All she wants is for him to understand and forgive her. Knowing how much Margaret dislikes attention and weakness, Hawkeye immediately enters the tent and takes her in his arms letting the door slam shut behind him. Taking comfort in the embrace, the nurse cries harder.

From that day, Margaret and Hawkeye decide not to keep secrets from the other for the remainder of their time together and even resume their walks to try and recreate a relationship. One afternoon as they take a walk before dinner, Hawkeye asks what their son was like. His only picture is of a newborn Michael and eagerly wants to know what the baby's personality is like. A soft smile crosses Margaret's face as she explains, "He had your eyes, and maybe your smile. It was too hard to tell yet. He was always curious though. Any time we met someone new, he eyed them curiously. For some reason he rarely cried."

"Yeah?" Hawkeye asks. With a small laugh, Margaret laughs, "I guess he got that from me."

"You know, I would've helped you two," Hawkeye states. Nodding, Margaret answers, "I know. I just didn't want to burden you, or get married just because of a child."

They keep walking in silence until Hawkeye reassures, "Well, I just want you to know, I'll be here whenever you need it."

Taking his hand, Margaret squeezes it before looking up and thanking him. Despite still wanting a real relationship with her, Hawkeye is aware that now is not a good time. Instead, he resumes his role as friend and confidant. A week later, men from the U.N. come to camp and Hawkeye can easily tell that Margaret is falling for the Swedish U.N. official Per Johannsen. Keeping his distance, Hawkeye is surprised when Per comes up to him in the recovery ward and remarks, "'Uh, Captain, when we were in the mess tent I sensed that, uh, you are not happy with the attention Major Houlihan gives me.'"

"'Margaret and I are just friends'," Hawkeye reassures the man before telling him to have a nice time with Margaret. Surprised at the man's less than excited remark, Hawkeye asks why. Asking if they can speak in private, Per explains that a land mine accident leaves him impotent. Neither men speaks until Per asks, "Would you mind keeping this secret?"

"No, not at all," Hawkeye states, but is unsure if he needs to leave yet. Thankfully, Per makes the situation a little less awkward by asking Hawkeye to be a buffer between Margaret and himself. Agreeing, the surgeon tells him he will be in the bar that night just in case. At the bar happily eavesdropping, Hawkeye notices how uncomfortable Per is under Margaret's eager talking and flirting. Giving his friend just enough time to embarrass herself, Hawkeye soon comes over and takes a chair beside her. Interrupting their conversation, Hawkeye lets Per make his escape and lets Margaret yell at him. Left alone, Hawkeye hopes that he does his job well. The next morning, he watches Margaret and Per kiss good bye as well as the affection she has at the man's send off.

"'So evidently you had a nice evening?'" Hawkeye asks going to stand next to Margaret as the jeep leaves. Smiling, the nurse answers, "'Oh, I certainly did. He's a wonderful man.'"

Thinking he dodges Margaret's wrath, the surgeon is surprised when she turns to him an begins to exclaim, "'And you! Thanks for trying to be a jerk.'"

Smiling at her, Hawkeye takes the compliment and nudges with his elbow for them to take a walk. Agreeing, Margaret tells him about her night with Per. Confused, Hawkeye asks, "All you two did was talk?"

"And drank wine," The nurse adds. "I just hope we can keep in touch."

"Look at you making friends," Hawkeye teases as Margaret elbows him playfully in the side. He merely laughs and tells her, "You know, Per asked me if we were together? Apparently I looked upset in the Mess Tent."

"What did you tell him?" Margaret asks curiously. Shrugging, Hawkeye answers, "That we're just friends."

"Are we?" Margaret questions. Confused, Hawkeye wonders if he reads their relationships incorrectly. His questions are answered as Margaret explains, "Lorraine came to the same conclusion when she was here in April, about us. Sure, Per will always be a wonderful, close friend, but I think I enjoy talking with him more than anything. With you I can really be myself."

"Margaret? Are you asking me on a date?" Hawkeye teases knowing no other way to approach the topic. Shaking her head, the nurse answers, "I'm asking if we can start a relationship and see where it goes."

Noting the smile that spreads across his face, Margaret knows she asks the right question. They agree to keep their relationship simple, not wanting a disastrous repeat of their past, and find that their relationship is stronger somehow.


	29. Chapter 29

On the Fourth of July, the camp is given a chance to go to the beach and relax. Acting like children, the entire camp runs toward the water just to catch a glimpse of the ocean before playing different games in the sand. Toward the end of the day, Hawkeye and Margaret decide to find a space in the shade to cool off. Laying in the sand, the friends start to talk more like a couple as they ask about their childhoods and friendships. After a while the pair decides to crack jokes and any exuberance the camp has about their day off continues on the bus ride back to camp until snipers destroy any happiness they have left. Panicked and worried, everyone keeps quiet except the baby in the back of the bus. Logically, the man knows the baby cannot help crying, but he keeps hearing himself telling the mother to keep the infant quiet. The next thing he knows he is on a one way trip to see Sydney Freeman with special psychiatry sessions included. Margaret hates to be the one to make the call to send Hawkeye to Sydney, or at least tell Colonel Potter to, and dreads the moment she will speak to him. When Klinger places a call a few days after Hawkeye leaves, she is happy to hear what he has to say to others, but dreads talking to Hawkeye herself. To her dismay, Potter hands her the phone.

"'How do you feel?'" She asks once she is on the phone, careful to choose her words like the others. They are told he is subject to rambling and have no idea what will set him off.

"'Like a hostage'," Hawkeye answers sarcastically. "'How 'bout you?'"

Thankfully, the conversation lasts no more than a rather awkward minute before she passes the phone to Klinger. As the clerk says all the wrong things and goes on about the peace talks meaning nothing, Margaret quickly takes the phone from him and talks to Hawkeye again making it sound like the war will end soon. By his lack of reply, she can tell he does not believe her. Softly, she states, "'You just take care of yourself, okay? We all miss you here.'"

"'Then get me out!'" Hawkeye replies. Margaret almost answers when the line goes dead. Handing the phone back to Klinger, Margaret announces, "'Well, he didn't sound too bad.'"

"'Sounded more relaxed then I was'," B.J. admits. A week later, the younger surgeon goes to see Hawkeye and is astounded by how somber his friend is. Jokes are replaced by incessant rambling. However, it is still almost a week until Hawkeye comes back to the 4077th and into immediate surgery. He is also blindsided when he finds out that B.J. goes home. Although instead of wallowing over two friends and bunk mates he never gets to say good bye to, the surgeon heads toward the bus to help the wounded. Margaret works with Hawkeye during surgery and can see the pain on his face before he operates.

"'How are you feeling?'" Margaret asks worriedly.

"'Fine, fine. What could be wrong?'" Hawkeye deflects before rambling about how he is about to do surgery and his best friend is gone without a note just like Trapper. Prompting Hawkeye to start, Margaret gives a worried glance to Colonel Potter wondering if he really is okay to be back. She notes he is a little calmer when bandaging a soldier, which is a comfort. As he wipes his hands off from the plaster, Hawkeye sits on the desk that Margaret is at. Looking up at him from her seat, Margaret asks, "'You holding up okay?'"

"'All things considered'," He replies as an explosion sounds in the distance. Quickly he amends, "'Most things considered.'"

With the camp dealing with the bombing for days already, Margaret quickly grabs Hawkeye's arm and takes him to a room with sandbags to keep them safe. However, when the shelling gets to be too much for him, Hawkeye finds the tank that is being hidden and drives it into the dump. Coming back to camp, he is unaware of Colonel Potter deciding to call Sydney thinking Hawkeye's re-entrance to the 4077th is premature. As soon as they call to Syndey, the camp has a bug out due to a fire. While the camp is placed elsewhere, B.J. becomes the new surgeon for the camp, much to the camp's delight. A day later when the camp is playing with the orphaned children, all Hawkeye can do is sit back and watch. He is too afraid to be around any child right now with the memories of the smothered baby still fresh in his mind. The sight of Margaret playing with the kids is not helpful either. First a son he never knows dies, then he inadvertantly kills an infant by screaming at its mother. Walking outside of camp, Hawkeye is only a little surprised to find Sydney follow him.

"'Being around kids makes me a little uncomfortable these days'," Hawkeye admits to Syndey as they take a walk.

"'Well, that's something we'll have to work on'," Syndey states knowing Hawkeye will not be over his trauma for a while. Asking what else is wrong, Hawkeye admits that sleep alludes him and he is unable to get back in a rhythm during surgery. After Sydney leaves him, Hawkeye decides to walk a little more. Finding a nice spot that looks out onto some landscape, the surgeon sits down to try and keep from thinking. Taking a walk of her own, Margaret notices Hawkeye sitting alone and walks toward him. Quietly, she sits beside him as he stares ahead. She knows Hawkeye probably does not want to hear her words of comfort over his stay in an asylum, but states, "I know how you feel."

Hearing her friend scoff, the nurse quietly reveals, "Michael died in my arms. One night after work, I was feeding him and thought he went back to sleep. When I went to put him to bed, I found out he died."

She tries not to choke up, and is instantly panged by how direct her words sound. A frown crosses her face as she remembers the moment, but it seems a little more removed than before.

"Why are you telling me this?" He asks somberly bringing her out of her thoughts. Gently, she answers, "Because you can never get over this."

"Thanks," Hawkeye mumbles detesting the pep talk.

"You can only move on from it," Margaret finishes. "You may deal with it everyday, but you can go on."

Waiting for her to look at him, Hawkeye thanks her. She gives him a small smile answering, "Glad to help."

Going back to looking at the scenery, Margaret is unaware of Hawkeye staring at her. Finally, he asks, "How old was he?"

Eyes brimming with tears, Margaret whispers, "Three months."

"I'm sorry," He answers taking her hand. Leaning her head against him she feels a sense of pain when she hears Hawkeye state, "I wish I could've known him."

Squeezing the surgeon's hand, Margaret mumbles that they need to head back to camp. With a halfhearted groan, Hawkeye agrees before standing up and walking with Margaret. Unbeknownst to them, Sydney watches the pair walk back to camp knowing that as long as they stay together, Hawkeye will be fine.

The next day, the camp heads back to home base only to find it destroyed by the fire. Getting back to surgery, there are only short breaks as it seems like all the wounded in Korea come to their MASH. When Hawkeye is given a little girl no more than eight years old to work on, Potter asks to trade. Looking over at Sydney, Hawkeye declines Potter's offer. Somehow looking after the child is therapeutic. Not helpful, but therapeutic. When the surgery is over, Hawkeye goes to take a much needed shower before heading to Post Op to check on his patient and wait for the party to celebrate the end of the war. Entering Post Op, Hawkeye quickly finds the youngest patient and goes to check on her. Margaret watches from her post at one of the beds. She watches Hawkeye sit down and can see his demeanor stiffen a little. Walking toward him, Margaret places her hand on his shoulder which he easily covers with his own. Leaning down, Margaret whispers, "Just tell me when and I'll get you out of here."

"Is that an offer?" He teases. The nurse rolls her eyes before squeezing his shoulder and leaving.

After the party that night, Hawkeye and Margaret take a walk citing it as one last thing they will do together. As they walk, Hawkeye chuckles. Raising an eyebrow, Margaret asks what is wrong. Shaking his head, the surgeon states, "I was just thinking about that movie with Irene Dunne and Charles Boyer on that ship. The one with pink champage?"

"Love Affair?" Margaret asks confused. Nodding, Hawkeye answers, "Yeah. I just thought that maybe after the war we could meet up again. Take a walk? You said you're going to work in the States, and I'm going back to Maine."

Margaret quickly notes a hint of wistfulness in her friend's statement asking, "You want to meet up again in New York?"

"Yeah. Make a new start for ourselves. Margaret, I never really got over not seeing you after that night. I don't think I could do it all over again."

With a sigh, Margaret admits she has the same problem and proposes, "How about we meet a month after the war. In Central Park."

"Deal. I'd prefer to not be wheelchair bound when we meet," Hawkeye quips. By now they are outside Margaret's tent which is sparse accept the cot. Everything else is close to packed away. The pair stands in front of the door unsure of their next move until Margaret takes Hawkeye's hand, cranes her neck, and whispers in his ear.

"Are you sure?" He asks. Nodding, Margaret leads Hawkeye into her tent both grinning like idiots.

The next day is a flurry of packing, a wedding, and good byes. Finally, only Hawkeye, Margaret, B.J., Charles, and Potter are left. Knowing her jeep will arrive soon, Margaret says her good byes. Stopping at Hawkeye just as her ride appears, she watches as he begins, "'So, uh, listen...'"

"'Yeah'," She answers knowing he is finalizing their meet up as well as last night. However with too much to say and too little time, the pair launch into a kiss that makes B.J., Charles, and Potter feel awkward and intrusive. When Margaret and Hawkeye finally break apart, Hawkeye states casually, "'Well, so long.'"

"'See ya'," She replies before hopping into the jeep. Unwilling to repeat history, Margaret turns and waves to the men she leaves behind. Instantly, she locks eyes with Hawkeye hoping he will understand that she will not leave him again. He gives a small nod, and gleefully the nurse turns around in the jeep.

As she walks through Central Park a month later, the now civilian nurse is happy to find a small breeze to break up the August heat. Sitting on a bench taking in the scenery, Margaret is unaware of her hat coming off until a tall man with blue eyes and an infectious smile remarks, "Penny for your thoughts?"

Looking up at him, Margaret grins as Hawkeye greets, "Hey, Major Baby."

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Against All Orders](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16776040) by [oldmoviewatcher](https://archiveofourown.org/users/oldmoviewatcher/pseuds/oldmoviewatcher)




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